Easter Intensive: Online Satsang of April 1, 2024

[Dhyan Mikael:] Hello, welcome to the second Satsang in this Easter Intensive. Nice to have you here. I apologize for starting a bit late today. There were a few difficulties at the beginning, but now everything is running smoothly, and I am happy that this can take place. If you're here for the first time, I'll briefly talk about what we're doing here in the livestream, as usual.

In this Satsang, if you want, you can ask me a question and I'll try to say something about it. And you can do it in different ways. You can either type in your question in the YouTube chat or in the Zoom chat, or you can also speak to me directly if you're on Zoom. Then you can simply raise your hand, and then, Simone will know that you would like to present your question yourself, and then you will get your turn when the time comes; then Simone will let you know.

And I would like to add something else. If you have asked a question, then you are welcome to contact me afterwards by e-mail so that I have your e-mail address, and in a few days, when the recording goes online, I will then send you a link to the place in the video where your question was answered; and you will then also receive a transcript of the answer.

However, I can only do this if I have received your e-mail address. So, if you would like this, if you are interested, then just send me an e-mail after this Satsang, and then I will contact you when the recording of the Satsang is online. And now, we will talk here together until 3:30 pm, and in the last half hour, between 3:30 pm and 4 pm, we will meditate together. If you like, you are welcome to meditate with us.

Meditating together is something very special. Swamiji, the Guru in India who teaches Samarpan Meditation, says: if you meditate together... for example, if a hundred people meditate together for half an hour, then it's as if you meditate alone for half an hour a hundred times. It's a reinforcing factor, so to speak. And I feel that too. I find it particularly supportive and uplifting, meditating together, and you are cordially invited to join in today.

If you don't know how Samarpan Meditation works, that's no problem at all. I'll say a few sentences about it just before we start; it's very, very easy, and then you can just join in, if you like. And now, we'll just start straight away with the questions. Simone, do you already have something to read out? I think you said you had one was left over from yesterday.

I can't hear anything, Simone. I think you muted yourself.

[Simone:] Sorry. I still have a question from yesterday, that's right. And also, I already have a new question for today, which I'll read out after your answer.

[Dhyan Mikael:] Yes, great, very nice.

Fear of closeness and loneliness

Link to topic in video at 3m50s

[Simone:] The question, the first one, is from Mukunda. She asks: "Can you say something about the common dilemma of both fear of closeness and fear of loneliness?"

[Dhyan Mikael:] Thank you, Mukunda, thank you. Thank you for your question.

The two fears have something in common. It's like this: if I am not close to myself... Or, let me start the other way around. I know this fear of being alone from years ago. I used to be afraid of being alone, without realizing it. I realized at some point that I was afraid of being alone, after I had realized how I behave in relationships.

I've always made all kinds of compromises in relationships. I just wanted to make sure that my partner was happy, and for a while I even believed that this was something great. And at some point, 24 years ago now, I came to my spiritual Master Soham, and after he had known me for a short time, he said to me: "Mikael, you're afraid of being alone", and I didn't even know that.

But after he told me that once, 24 years ago, I took a closer look, and then I discovered that he was right. And then I discovered how this fear of being alone has colored my whole life; all my relationships; my friendships; the way I relate to other people.

And this fear of being alone comes from not being close to ourselves. Today, I am no longer afraid of being alone at all, but not because I have overcome this fear, but because through my spiritual Master, through meditation, I have very gradually learned to be close to myself; to feel myself and to live within myself, so to speak.

And when you set out on this path and slowly get closer to yourself, you discover a place within yourself where you are in good hands. You discover yourself, but it's so abstract when you say it like that. You start to feel comfortable inside yourself, to feel secure, to feel whole, to feel safe. And then, you no longer need people on the outside, on this emotional level, and then the fear of being alone disappears. Then you are no longer lonely when you are alone; then you are happy when you are alone.

And the discomfort or fear of being together is basically the same thing; the fear of closeness with another person. Because if I'm not close to myself, how am I supposed to be close to another person? That doesn't work at all. I don't know anything about closeness, and being close to another person used to mean that I would lose myself completely. I wasn't close to myself and always lost myself in the other person. That may feel a bit romantic at first, but it's actually very painful and, of course, not at all pleasant or useful.

So, it's not really a contradiction at all, these two fears, only seemingly; only if you look at them superficially, but the cause of both is one and the same.

And that's why the solution is also one and the same.

The fear of being alone and the fear of closeness come from this habit, which we humans usually have, of always being completely out there with our attention; always being completely with other people, with our partner, our lover, our beloved, our husband, our wife.

And then, we are completely dependent on what happens there: whether we are liked, whether we are accepted, whether we get the attention we are so desperately looking for... And if we do... when our attention is directed outwards, it always leads to problems. The whole world does it, and the whole world thinks it's normal, but that doesn't make it any better. When you start to change direction and turn your attention to yourself, everything changes. Then, the fear of being alone will disappear, as will the fear of closeness.

Only then will you become capable of closeness. First you learn to be close to yourself, and then, quite automatically, without having to learn anything special, without having to think about it, you can be close to others. And then you realize for the first time in your life that you were never actually close to people before, no matter how romantic or beautiful it was. Only when you have become close to yourself, then you no longer need to be close to the other person, but only then does it become possible.

And you learn to be close to yourself through meditation; through what we do together afterwards... through Samarpan Meditation, very gradually. It's not witchcraft; it's not difficult. It is simply something you have to get to know and then practice, simply because we have never learned it before, in our lives. From birth, we have always learned to be out there with our attention. No one has taught us to look at ourselves. You just have to practice it. It's not a big deal. It takes a bit of time, that's all. Thank you for this lovely question. Thank you very, very much. Thank you, Mukunda.

Dealing with the demands of others

Link to topic in video at 12m29s

[Simone:] So, I'll read out the second question now, Mikael.

[Dhyan Mikael:] Yes, please, Simone.

[Simone:] It's from Michael. "Dear Mikael, yesterday I was allowed to ask you questions about my relationship and separation. Thank you very much for this opportunity."

[Dhyan Mikael:] You are so welcome.

[Simone:] "Your words on the subject of love, having no ideas, no wishes and no plans, touched me very much and have centered something in me from which I can see my love for my partner and also for myself more clearly. It wasn't always easy for me to love her as she is. I can see that clearly now. This also applies to my love for myself, and it is somehow logical. I'll take your words and the feeling inside me with me on our upcoming vacation, even if my partner is quite clear about wanting to separate.

I have now come up with two more questions that I would like to ask. It wasn't just that I had wishes that were more demanding, but that she also made demands of me. In our current we-are-separating phase, there are hardly any demands on the other person. Living together is loving and feels very free and easy. It is crazy. My first question would be how I can deal with the demands from outside that are not very negotiable for my partner or where I have resistance. How can I deal lovingly with myself and my resistance or her request, her wish?

One example in our relationship was (that she said): 'if you want a child, you have to take on at least half the work and probably give up your job for a while.' As I had just started my own business, this was a big resistance for me. I think we both had little flexibility for each other on this issue, which prevented us from having children. Can you say something about this? My second question concerns a statement you made that I would like to understand better."

[Dhyan Mikael:] Simone, may I interrupt you for a moment? I'd like to answer the first question, otherwise I'll forget the question, which would be a shame. But please save the second question for afterwards, please.

[Simone:] Yes, I will.

[Dhyan Mikael:] Thank you, Michael. It's great that you're here again today. I'm very happy.

Yes, it's really exciting what you're saying, that right now in this separation phase, after this shock, after this painful shake-up caused by this conflict that has now broken out, everything is suddenly so easy again because... you just said it so beautifully: because the ideas and desires are not there for a certain period of time. And that's how it is at the beginning of a relationship, a romance, too.

That's why it's so nice at the beginning. You get to know each other, and in this time where you get to know each other, your own intellect has not yet had the opportunity to categorize the other person, to get to know the other, and then to project your own desires onto this person. So, you meet the other as a blank slate. You have no wishes, you have no ideas. You simply take the other person as they are.

And even things that are funny, that become difficult later on, you just find them cute or different or interesting. And that's why it's so nice at the beginning, and that's why it's often so nice at the end. You break up, and after a while you don't even know why you broke up, because you suddenly love the other person again, because all those desires are gone.

That's why I said yesterday: when you love, it only works if you have no desires, no demands on the other person, no idea what that person should be like. Then there is room for love. Everything else is not love; everything else is an arrangement, a trade, some kind of a deal.

And you ask how you could deal with your partner's demands, and you have given an example. You say that she said: 'if you want a child, then you have to do this and that, otherwise it won't work.

And that is also a very practical matter. You say you would like to have a child with her, and then she tells you: "Okay, if you want to have a child... Here's how it could work." So, for me, that's not a requirement that's being put on you from outside. She's simply saying to you: "Hey, listen, a very practical matter: if we have a child together, then a few things are necessary, and this is how I imagine it." Actually, that sounds quite grounded to me. I would advise you to start with your (own) wishes and requirements, and then everything will fall into place automatically.

Then you won't have to think about it at all; all these questions will disappear. Once you press the reset button on yourself and forget about your requirements, your ideas and wishes for the relationship, for this person, and simply start living with her again, then you will realize on your own what is possible and what is not.

You've just started your own business.

I know what that's like. All your energy is going into it.

This is not the time to have a child. Your girlfriend senses that quite well.

You know, the thing about wishes is this: life happens in a very specific way, in a very practical way. You don't need to worry about life at all. The things that are supposed to happen just happen, for example, that this woman is in your life; for example, that you've just started your own business. These are the things that life serves up to you and you just go with the flow, with your energy. You don't need any wishes. And wishes, these ideas that arise in us, that's what our intellect puts on top. It has absolutely nothing to do with life.

It always gets in the way; it never fits in.

There's never room for it. You can also see that in this situation. You have a partnership, you've started your own business, you probably have your hands full. You probably don't even know where to find the time to have a good rest in the evening. But that doesn't stop our heads from having the most adventurous wishes for which there is no room at all. But we want it anyway, like a small child who says "but I want to" and stamps its foot on the ground. It's not just your head, don't worry: we're all like that.

Start with yourself. Forget your wishes, and then see what's left of the sources of conflict in your partnership.

But start afresh now. Don't think about how things were before. You know, you are now back to square one. You can now start all over again.

As far as having children is concerned, I would like to say one more thing. You know, it's the woman who has the child. She gets pregnant. She carries the child. Her body gives birth to the child. The child grows in her body.

Actually, no man has the right to want a child. That is the woman's business, because she has the child; she is then the mother, not you. It's quite easy for a man to want a child, but I don't know if that's a good wish.

And I would like to say something about how it works between two people when you stop having wishes for each other. Some people say: "How do you then live together at all? Who decides what you do together? How does that happen?"

I would like to give an example from an area that is very controversial for most people, namely sexuality.

In sexuality... I like to use this example because it makes the pain of desires particularly clear... how terrible it actually is when someone makes a wish or even a demand of you.

When you get together for the first time, at the very beginning, and have no idea about each other at all... when you are far too scared and excited to say anything, then you get together and everything that happens... You experience incredibly beautiful things together, but none of these things that happen, happen because one of you says: "I want this now or that now." It all happens by itself. Like a... I was talking about this dance yesterday... like in a dance, a dance in which no one leads.

And then the first kiss happens, and not because one of them said: "I want to kiss you now", but because they are both very sensitive and attentive. Everyone senses for themselves that they are open to something in particular, and if the other person is open to the same thing, then, in a magical way, it happens by itself. You don't need to say anything; you don't need to ask. If you have to say something or ask something, then something is wrong; then the other person is probably not open to it. And it's the same with sex, with sleeping together... that happens by itself.

And that's how you can be together.

And in every moment of being together, in every moment, always be ready to accept it as it is now.

I just said I wanted to take the example of sexuality, because for people it's particularly difficult and emotionally charged, like a minefield.

Imagine you have an encounter with your wife, with your girlfriend, and you feel lust and you realize: "Ah, well, I'm really hot for her, now I'd like to sleep with her", and you feel: yes, she also has lust. And one thing leads to another, and suddenly, you're in bed together. But then there comes a moment when you realize: "Oh, something has changed." She doesn't feel well and pulls away. And then, immediately, in that moment, say 'yes' to it. Suddenly everything is different.

The date you're on has suddenly changed completely. If you now can say 'yes' to this because you have not developed any expectations, then you will spend a wonderful evening in a different way. But if you think: "But now I want to!", then you will have a terrible evening. And that's how it is with everything, with every little thing, not just having children, not just sexuality, but with everything: washing up, shopping, going for a walk... really with every little thing.

I repeat what I said yesterday: the other person is not there to fulfill our wishes, to fulfill our desires. Life is responsible for that. And how that happens, happens by itself. We never need to tell the other person anything about what we want. It is not necessary. It's the wrong address.

So... what you're experiencing right now, right now, this magical time when suddenly all these desires are gone... You said earlier: suddenly, everything is very simple again. It can always be like that. It doesn't go away because she suddenly doesn't love you anymore. It goes away because the desires come in. This is not necessary.

And there are such 'sacred desires'... Wanting to have a child, for example, is such a wish where everyone says: "Yes, that's a great wish, I understand that, you can have this wish." There are no sacred wishes. There are no sacred needs for which the other person must have understanding. There is no such thing. It's all poison for being together, all together.

So, if you want, you can continue what you are experiencing right now. And if you take care that you don't have any wishes for her... if you take care that you don't develop any ideas inside you about what should happen now... that's enough. You don't need to worry about her wishes and her ideas. That is not necessary. Start with yourself, and you will experience miracles. You don't need to think about her. You don't need to worry either. If you start with yourself, you will experience things with her that you could never have imagined.

That's the only thing we have to do: start with ourselves, and with all the things that come from us; nothing more is necessary.

I think it's great what you said: that it's suddenly so easy now. What a beautiful experience. That really is a remarkable sign. Thank you very much. So, and now there was a second question, Simone.

Realizing that one cannot change oneself

Link to topic in video at 31m36s

[Simone:] Yes, exactly. I'll read it out now. "My second question concerns a statement you made, which I would like to understand better. What is the difference between 'everyone is the way they are', or 'we can't really change' and the deeper realization in this? This already brings about a change. Is this about the ego part in us that is the way it is? The question is a bit mindy, but perhaps you understand what I mean."

[Dhyan Mikael:] Simone, would you please read the question to me again?

[Simone:] Yes. "What is the difference between 'everyone is the way they are', or 'we can't really change' and the deeper realization in that. This means that a change is already happening. Is it about the ego part in us that is the way it is?"

[Dhyan Mikael:] Thank you.

We always look outwards, as I said in the first question this afternoon. We look outwards for everything what we think we need, to the other person. And the other person looks at us. That's why, as I just said in detail, relationships become so terrible and so difficult and so sticky and so complicated.

And we believe that if the other person were different, or we believe that if we were different, then everything would be easier.

But the real challenge is not that we have to be different. The real challenge is also not that the other person has to be different. We believe that, but only because we don't know anything else. If you say: "Okay, I am the way I am"... When you acknowledge: "I can't change", and when you acknowledge that the other person can't change either... If you acknowledge that the other person is also the way they are, period... then you have reached a very interesting point.

Because then there is this: "Well, and now? How to go on from here?" And that's the interesting question. Once you realize where the solution is not, then you either turn to the place where the solution is, or you realize: "I don't even know where it is. I have believed all my life that the solution is for me to change or that the solution is for other people to change or for life to change, or for the world to change, but if that's not the solution, then what is the solution to all these problems I feel?"

That's the interesting question. Where is the solution, really? And this is what happens... When you admit to yourself, and it's not that easy at first: "Okay, I am who I am. I give up trying to change myself. I give up trying to change my partner. And now what?"

And then it gets interesting. And then, for the first time in your life, you have the opportunity to look in a new direction. Until now, you thought the solution was to change something about your psyche or the world or something else. And now someone comes along and tells you: "Forget all that. Look inwards.

Look at something that you don't know yet and that has nothing to do with this world at all, in reality"... your soul, of which you know nothing.

And then, by doing that which basically has nothing to do with the world... The soul was there before your body with the funny psyche was born, and this soul will be there when this body has long died. But when you, when your consciousness, begins to turn towards it, everything out there changes. There is a wonderful sentence from Jesus. He puts the whole secret of life into one sentence.

He says: "Turn to God; everything else will follow." Normal people have absolutely no idea what is meant by this: "Turning to God" means, in Jesus' words: turning inwards; searching for your own soul; meditating. These words did not exist two thousand years ago. The word 'inward' did not exist. No one would have known what this "inside" was supposed to be. Even today, people do not know.

No one really knows what the soul is supposed to be. You have to begin to experience it, then you know. But that is what Jesus is talking about. He says: "Begin to pray; turn to God." Praying was his word for meditation. The word did not exist in this country at that time.

And this one sentence from Jesus now says: "If you do this... if you start, instead of constantly looking outwards, fiddling with the world, fiddling with yourself and with other people... if you turn instead to what is within, to what is completely unknown to you, to God, then everything else will follow." All the things that need to change will change on their own.

And you say so beautifully in your question that if you acknowledge this: "I am the way I am", then something will happen. And you are right: the moment I am able to say: "Okay, I am the way I am. Okay, you are the way you are. You push all my buttons; I find you terribly difficult; I love you; but you are the way you are"... in that moment... this kind of realization is like a surrender to life.

When you say that for the first time: "Okay, I am the way I am, you are the way you are, there's nothing I can do"... It's like stopping for the very first time in your life and admitting: "Okay, I'm powerless." That's surrender, that's Samarpan. That's what you do in meditation: Samarpan means 'surrender'.

And from that, everything else happens by itself, just as you say. When a person can truly say: "I am the way I am, I don't want to change, I can't change at all. Everything is the way it is"... When you get to that point, then things really take off on their own. So, you're absolutely right. It's not a contradiction.

And that's why this meditation thing is so magical, you know. Some people are surprised. There are Gurus... With Swamiji, who brings Samarpan Meditation to the society, it happens a lot. People come to him with all kinds of questions, with all kinds of problems, and his answer is always the same: "Meditate, and your problem will be solved." And that's true, because that's exactly what happens during meditation, what you just described: in meditation, you let everything be as it is.

You stop wanting to change anything, wanting to do anything, wanting to evaluate anything. You stop all that. And simply by stopping... simply by truly doing nothing, inwardly, suddenly everything becomes possible. That is the secret of the world; that is the secret of life. That's why it says: "Put God first; everything else will follow." This is not a religious metaphor. It's a very practical description of how life works, but there are no people who put it into practical words, which is why I like making videos about it. I'm an engineer, I like it practical.

Thank you for your question, thank you.

Do polarities such as male and female dissolve?

Link to topic in video at 43m11s

[Simone:] I would like to read out the next question, Mikael.

[Dhyan Mikael:] Yes, please, Simone.

[Simone:] It comes from Alexandra.

[Dhyan Mikael:] Hello Alexandra, nice to have you here. I'm delighted.

[Simone:] "Happy Easter and thank you very much for this live Satsang. Do all polarities dissolve, including the masculine and feminine?"

That's the first question, and then there's a second one.

[Dhyan Mikael:] Yes, I'll start with the first one. Thank you.

All polarities dissolve, including the masculine, including the feminine, but you live in a feminine body, and that remains feminine. And your partner's body is probably male, and it will also remain male, even when he finds himself and becomes a soul; he will still have a male body, and you will still have a female body. But your identity is no longer that of a woman. You still have this body, which has female characteristics and does female things. It all stays that way. It doesn't go away. But you are no longer identified with it.

You live somewhere else. You're just grateful that you can use this body for this life.

And you no longer see the other person as a man or a woman, but as a human being, as a soul, as a being that has nothing to do with what you can see with your eyes, with the body, which is male or female. It doesn't matter. Of course, it also has certain characteristics that can be beautiful or difficult, but you can see through it, so to speak, to the bottom of the other being. And that happens the better you get to know yourself; the closer you get to yourself, the closer you get to your own soul; the more you experience what you really are.

I am in a male body, which is very masculine in every respect, in the beautiful as well as the silly ones, and it stays that way, it doesn't change. But I'm no longer as attached to it as I used to be. I can smile about it now. And I know that I'm not a man, even though this body is male, and it remains so.

And that's how it is with everything we call polarities, with good and bad. You realize: there is nothing good, there is nothing bad. There is no one who does anything good. It's all hot air. There's nobody doing anything bad either, although there are many things that happen that are very, very painful, but you understand where it's coming from. And then it all dissolves.

When the meditation seems so long

Link to topic in video at 46m53s

Yes, so much for the first question. Simone, would you please read me the next one?

[Simone:] Yes, with pleasure. "If half an hour of meditation seems so long, what am I doing wrong?"

[Dhyan Mikael:] Oh, thank you, that's a great question.

If meditating for half an hour seems like an infinitely long time, then you're doing everything exactly right. That's a really good sign. That's why we sit down to meditate. Look, it's like this: We've already heard this a few times in this Satsang... We're used to doing something, since birth. We believe that's what life is all about: achieving something, changing something.

It's important, it has to happen. We believe in that. And that's how our inner being is knitted; there is constant movement, all the time. Even if you're sitting comfortably in a café somewhere and drinking a cappuccino, even then your head is rattling. You're already on to the next thing and the next thing after that, and you're barely listening to the other person, let alone to yourself.

And that's normal. That's just how we are. It's not that we're wrong. That's how we grew up. That's what we've learned. That's how everyone is. And when you start to meditate, you start to feel what a power and what a force that has... what you've just mentioned. And it's wonderful when you start to feel it. It's not pleasant, but it's good to feel it. That's why you sit down to meditate.

So, you're not doing anything wrong. It's also not the case that you have to reach a certain state in this half hour, in order to have done something right, for example, that you sit there for half an hour and then at some point the point comes where all the impatience disappears and you just sit there blissfully. That's not the goal. Sometimes it happens; you will get to know it. But that's not the point. The point is to try to rest your attention here and to do this very gently, without any judgment, again and again, again and again, and then experience what happens.

And you don't need to do anything with it. You know, you don't have to make the impatience go away now; you don't have to worry about it. You can just let it be there, and you just keep going back up here. And then you're impatient for half an hour, and that's incredibly fruitful. Even if you experience the same thing every morning for a week: don't get discouraged. That's exactly why we meditate. It won't stay that way, don't worry, but it's important that you feel it.

The more relaxed you can let it be there, the better. And it's the same for me, you know... sometimes I have days when I realize how impatient my inner self is. But I've gotten used to it by now, I don't worry about it anymore. Sometimes I sit down to meditate and I'm in a wonderful calm right from the start, and then the restlessness often comes in later somewhere; it usually comes in around some corner at some point.

And that is what most people misunderstand about meditation: meditation is not about sitting there blissfully and in silence for half an hour. That is not the aim of the exercise. In your life, more and more stillness will spread, more and more peace, but in meditation, we get to know the restlessness, simply by sitting very still, motionless, doing nothing, ignoring thoughts as best we can, and that's exactly what you say happens: we get to know the restlessness.

And simply by letting the restlessness be there without worrying about it, no matter what it says, and coming back to this resting place again and again until it pulls us away again and then we come back again... This alone makes something very, very important and essential happen; but it happens by itself. So, it's not a bad sign at all, on the contrary: I'm absolutely delighted that you're telling me this. It's a good sign that you can perceive this unrest. That's good. Thank you for your question. Thank you, Alexandra.

[Simone:] Alexandra writes: "Thank you, what a restful answer."

[Dhyan Mikael:] Yes, meditation can be restful. Just let the restlessness meditate with you and rest as best you can, as quietly as you can. It's all no problem. Thank you.

Everything is overwhelming, everything is so exhausting

Link to topic in video at 53m42s

[Simone:] Then I'll read out the next question.

[Dhyan Mikael:] Yes, please.

[Simone:] It's from Katharina.

[Dhyan Mikael:] Hello, Katharina.

[Simone:] "What can I do if my nervous system is constantly overwhelmed, there is inner tension, discomfort and everything is so exhausting? I've been meditating with Samarpan Meditation for about half a year. Thank you."

[Dhyan Mikael:] Yes, that's also a really good sign. I know you don't like these signs, and I understand that.

You know, we live in a completely crazy world, and everyone thinks it's normal.

The way people keep themselves busy and overwhelmed and bombarded with impressions is unbelievable. It's all completely inhuman, but no one knows any different.

And as soon as you start to get on the right track... as soon as you start to turn around and go in the direction of rest, go in the direction of health, go in the direction of recovery... as soon as you do that... The first thing that happens is that you notice the restlessness and the pain of it, and the noise inside, and the infinite exhaustion.

That goes hand in hand with it.

That's why I'm happy that you can perceive this.

That's why it's good that you can perceive it. It won't stay like this forever, but the way back to peace, to rest, leads through the feeling of exhaustion, through the feeling of restlessness, through the feeling of noise and all these things inside you. It goes through there. It's a good sign.

It will also take a while. The more non-judgmental you can simply perceive it, without doing much with it, the better these feelings can do their work. You don't need to do much yourself. It comes naturally. The better you can feel the exhaustion, the better the exhaustion will teach you what you need to do to feel better. I do the same thing, and this controls my life.

Sometimes I have days or weeks where I have a lot of work, and I want to make the videos, and I want to answer my correspondence, I don't want to keep the people who write to me waiting. And then I feel so exhausted, and then I just have to feel this exhaustion, and then I have the feeling: everyone will be annoyed, everyone thinks Mikael is doing something wrong, but I can't; I just have to acknowledge what's there.

Nothing more is necessary. And then, that automatically gives me exactly the relaxation I need, simply by feeling exhausted. This is actually a very ingenious arrangement by nature, and it's the same for you.

You have decades of life behind you where you couldn't feel your limits, and now you realize: your batteries are empty. Your nervous system is at its lower limit. And that's great: now you can feel it. And now, in this time when you are feeling the exhaustion and this strain, in this time the recharging is happening, and very, very slowly, very gradually, it will change.

But don't wait for it to change. Just be with the way it is now, as if it will be like this forever. Settle into it. Organize your day, organize your everyday life in such a way that it fits in with the way you are right now. It will change, yes, but of its own accord.

And meditation does something quite magical. The only thing we need on this entire path is sensitivity. As I said at the beginning of my answer to you, we live in a world that is becoming increasingly insensitive. People are getting more and more input for the nervous system, more and more input of food and things that burden the body instead of relieving it, and that is why people are becoming more and more insensitive; that is why they are also becoming more and more rough.

The way to heal, and this is the only thing that is necessary for healing or recovery, as I just told you, is to feel the exhaustion or the illness, the pain. And when you meditate, your sensitivity increases, and that is why Samarpan Meditation leads to your whole life changing for the better in all areas: because deep inside you, you magically become more sensitive. However, this also means that you initially feel everything that makes your life so difficult.

And that is normal. That is good. Be ready for it, feel it, and the changes will come naturally. And meditation helps you to become stronger so that you can bear it, and it helps you to become more sensitive to the extent that is possible for you and that is appropriate for you. This is a very magical, very fundamental way to change your life.

So, what you are reporting is a really good sign.

Thank you. I'm happy.

Self-doubt and self-condemnation

Link to topic in video at 1h02m39s

[Simone:] There's one more question, and it's from Lucy, which I'd like to read out now.

[Dhyan Mikael:] Yes, hello Lucy. Yes, please, read out the question. Thank you, Simone.

[Simone:] "I experience such strong self-doubt and self-judgment when I show myself to the world more, for example, when I sing. I only hear the one slightly off-key note, so to speak, and not the hundred right ones. How do I get out of that? I would love to be freer in my expression, but it just really gets me into intense states, and I want to make myself invisible again."

[Dhyan Mikael:] Thank you, Lucy. Thank you for showing yourself with this question. Oh, I understand you so well.

Singing is particularly intense. The human voice, and especially when singing.... you feel so naked and so exposed, it's incredible. A person who doesn't sing can't even imagine that. I don't sing myself, but my partner is a singer and that's how I know. She feels the same way as you do.

I feel the same way, by the way. As I said, I don't sing, but I started making these videos almost a year ago. I can tell you... well, it really is a classroom.

You ask how you can deal with it, with this self-doubt.

First of all, I want to go back to what was said earlier... you know, this: "I am the way I am." The thing is: you do something, and you show yourself to the world. When you sing, you have the feeling that you are turning your innermost self outwards and everyone can see your inner self.

And then this: "I am the way I am. And if everyone thinks I'm wrong: I am the way I am."

In essence, it's about the following.

It's about slowly learning to love yourself as you are. And at the beginning, you don't even know that you have a problem with loving yourself as you are. But then you do something crazy like singing or making videos, and then you realize what kind of self-doubt you have, and you realize all the things you think are wrong about yourself. And now you have two options. You can start to try to change yourself. You can try to change the things that you are convinced are wrong with you; to improve them. That's what most people do.

It's an endless spiral that never leads to the goal, but always to more problems, to more self-doubt.

Or, you can start to make peace with this feeling.

This self-doubt is basically saying: "I'm wrong. I'm not good enough. I need to be different", for whatever reason. The 'why' doesn't matter at all.

And be ready for it: to be completely wrong... To be prepared to be so wrong that you even die because of it. You know, when we were very small children, those babies who depended on their mother's breast because otherwise they would die... They are dependent on the mother's food, on the mother's attention and on the mother's touch, they depend on it, otherwise they die.

And we have that built into us... Because none of us got enough of that attention back then, we have that built into us: "If I'm not good enough, if I don't manage to get someone to accept me, then I'll die." And that's why behind these seemingly mundane things like singing... I mean, basically you couldn't care less whether someone likes your singing or not.

It's really not the deciding factor in life, but the feelings that go with it, they are deeply existential. And nothing helps. All the thinking about it doesn't help. Explaining where it comes from doesn't help either. There is only one thing that helps: making friends with these feelings that lie underneath: "Yes, being wrong. And if it means that I have to die now: yes, I'm ready to die." That's what's behind it.

My Master Soham once said to me: "If you are ready to be wrong, then you are free." I will never forget that.

Nobody tries to do that. Everyone tries to change themselves or convince others that it's okay to be the way they are. None of it helps. The feeling doesn't go away. But if you start now, these... you know... that these feelings come to you, that they show themselves to you and that you can feel them the way you do, that's a wonderful opportunity. It's not a problem. You know, everyone has these feelings inside them, everyone. Most people just don't feel them, and that's why they can't do anything. But you feel them, and that is a blessing.

Make peace with it; make friends with it, very intimate friends: "Yes, I am wrong." Of course, you are not wrong, but you feel that way. Be ready to feel this way. You are convinced of it... everything inside you feels like it really is true. You are convinced: "I am wrong, I am inadequate. I'm not enough. Okay."

That's the way. Earlier it was also about relationships twice, and people asked: "How am I supposed to deal with it when someone criticizes me; when someone says I should be different; when my partner doesn't think I'm good?" That's exactly the same way.

You feel totally wrong, and you know you can't be different. If you can then say, and I learned this from my Master Soham... If you can then say: "You are right, I'm wrong. But I am like this. I can't change. I know you're right: I should be different. I know you're right, I'm wrong. But I am like this." Then you are free.

And now, at the end of my answer, I would like to tell you a secret: life supports wrong people. The more willing you are to be as wrong as you really are, the more you will experience, in a very miraculous way, how life supports you just as you are. You will be amazed. I can only recommend it. Try it out.

Thank you. Thank you for your question. Thank you for having the courage to show yourself like this; and have fun singing. Singing is the best therapy. Like I said, I don't sing, but I experience it here in the house all the time.

Thank you for the answer

Link to topic in video at 1h13m21s

Simone, we might have time for one more question, don't you think?

[Simone:] Yes, we still have time. But I currently don't have a question. I just have two comments to read out. Katharina, who wrote about the overstrained nervous system, writes: "Thank you, Mikael, wonderful. Tears are flowing."

[Dhyan Mikael:] Just love yourself as you are, really. This feeling overwhelmed is like a baby that just wants to be held in your arms, you know... for weeks, for months.

[Simone:] Michael writes: "Thank you again, dear Mikael. I don't know what happened, but I cried the whole time you were answering my questions. The depth in your answer is very healing."

[Dhyan Mikael:] You know, I am so touched by your questions and also by the questions of others, because it is so human. We are this way, and no one has ever taught us how to live properly. And now we can finally start.

Why meditate on the crown chakra and not on the heart?

Link to topic in video at 1h14m53s

Now I'm going to start talking about Samarpan Meditation, because we're going to start meditating together in five minutes or four minutes. And before I go into the details, I would like to briefly return to a question that was asked yesterday. I can't remember the name of the person who asked right now, but she asked me why we don't go into the heart during Samarpan Meditation, but into the crown chakra instead.

And my answer yesterday was that she shouldn't ask, but should experience it, because then she will experience the answer directly herself. But today I would like to make a comment on this. The fact is that there is of course nothing wrong with the heart. The heart is a great thing, but you are not the heart; you are not the feelings; you are not this body.

And I know, of course you are not talking about the heart as a physical organ, but about the chakra, the feelings, the heart energy, but you are not that either. As I said, there is nothing wrong with that, it is a wonderful thing, but in this meditation, we are doing something different. Without knowing it at the moment, we focus our attention on what we really are. You rest your attention up here and you don't even know why.

But as you do this, by itself, without knowing how, you discover who you really are: not the body, not the emotions, not the desires, not even the heart, but a soul. You don't know what that is – soul. And that's why we focus our attention up here during meditation and simply ignore everything else – not because there's anything wrong with it, but because that's not who I am. We also say this mantra at the very beginning of the meditation: "I am your holy soul; I am a pure soul." I am a pure soul – nothing but soul.

And that is the reason why we turn to this spot, but how magical this passage is, this everyone has to find out for themselves. I wanted to add that to my answer yesterday, which went in a completely different direction.

Now we're meditating

Link to topic in video at 1h17m50s

So, now we're going to meditate together. I've already briefly mentioned what you do, practically speaking. It's like this: you just sit down comfortably... You can lean against something if you want; you can make yourself comfortable. I prefer to sit so that my back is upright; my back is free, this way I can meditate best. Sitting cross-legged is the best way for me to relax in meditation, but you can do it however is most comfortable for you. All these outward aspects, how you sit, where your hands are... I place them on my thighs... all that is secondary. None of that is really important.

The only essential thing is where we are during the meditation with our attention – that's the one thing this meditation is about – and we have it up here, at the top of the head; nothing esoteric, just here. And at the beginning of the meditation, we do the following: we take the flat of our hand and place it on top here. And the part of the head that you feel when you place the flat hand on it, that is the crown chakra. That's all you need to know about it.

And then, you make three circles with your hand in a clockwise direction on this spot on the top of your head, which warms it up a little and you can feel it better, and then, you take your hand down again very slowly; and now you can feel the spot up there a little better than usual. And while your hand is going down, you just keep your attention on that spot. And then we say the soul mantra that I have just mentioned: "I am a holy soul; I am a pure soul." This is repeated three times.

And then, we sit for half an hour – or, now, for twenty-eight minutes – in silence. No music plays, nothing else happens; you just sit there for half an hour. And you will notice how your thoughts tug at you... how your attention is suddenly no longer in the crown chakra at all. None of this matters at all, you can't do anything wrong. Your task is simply to keep coming back to the crown chakra with your attention. That's all; and that's what we're doing together now.

And I will recite the soul mantra, and you can repeat it if you like. And when the meditation time is over, at the very end, I'll say another sentence to call you back from meditation, and then we'll end this Satsang. Okay.

Meditation

Link to topic in video at 1h21m20s

I am a holy soul.

I am a pure soul.

I am a holy soul.

I am a pure soul.

I am a holy soul.

I am a pure soul.

-Meditation-

Thank you for meditation.

You can now slowly open your eyes again.

If you are interested in this meditation and would like to do it regularly, then there is an introduction from the people who officially spread this meditation here in Germany, that is Samarpan Meditation Deutschland e.V.

It's a short and very nice event that you can take part in online. It takes place once a week, on Mondays for example, but also on many other dates, and there you can learn more about this meditation if you like. But you can also ask me – however you like.

If you asked any questions during this intensive and would like to be notified by email when the video is online, and if you would like the link to the location of the answer in the video and the transcript, just send me an email and I'll get back to you.

Support me if it gives you Joy

Link to topic in video at 1h49m50s

Finally, I would like to say that all my content is always free, just like this Intensive, simply because I believe that I have no right to ask for any money for all these things because it is not mine. I received it as a gift from my Master, from my Guru, from life. That's why I just pass it on. But for very practical reasons, I am very happy to receive financial support, and if you feel like supporting me, it's very easy to do so.

I have the information on my website, on the 'Membership' page. And if you feel like it and enjoy it, then you can go there and find out more, or simply send me an e-mail and ask me. Thank you for being here. If you still have questions, you can write to me by e-mail and I will reply by e-mail. But you can also write to me by letter, I particularly like handwritten letters, and I will reply either in the next Online Satsang or in a video.

Thank you for being there. Thank you.

I love you.