Online Satsang of January 9, 2024
German with German and English subtitles.
German with English subtitles.
Topics: Nobody wants me with pain. Distraction from feelings. Are pets helpful? What if I distract myself? Is there a task for the soul? Emptiness and fullness. Loving when both partners rest in being. To be truthful. Is there a soul? Who decides who is a Guru?
About this Video:
What I love so much about Satsang are the questions from the participants, which are so directly taken from life – so practical and real.
In addition to spiritual questions such as "Is there a soul?", "Is there a soul mission?" and "Who decides who is a guru?", this time the focus was on human interaction several times: the fact that you are rejected by others when you are doing badly; the fact that you experience rejection when you start to become truthful.
These questions are very close to my heart. There is so much pain and confusion involved: why don't others like me just when I need them, just when I am starting to be authentic and real? You feel thwarted and discouraged by those around you. But in reality, the opposite happens.
I too have spent most of my life looking for encouragement and validation out there from other people. I only really found both within myself much later, and life helps with that. Through the lack of understanding and rejection we experience from others, we are thrown back on ourselves until we start to look in the other direction: inwards. This is exactly what this Satsang is all about.
Full translated transcript for reading along
[Mikael:] Good evening.
Welcome to tonight's Online Satsang. I am delighted that you are here. If you are here for the very first time today, with me in online Satsang, I would like to say two brief sentences about what we are doing here at all. You can ask a question if you like, and it will either be read out, if you ask it in writing. But you can also speak directly via Zoom, and then I will try to say something about it. And that's actually all we're going to do here for an hour and a half. Yes, Simone, do you have anything for me that has already been asked?
[Simone:] I just have a greeting, Maike.
[Mikael:] Yes, with pleasure.
[Simone:] Good evening, everyone.
[Mikael:] Yes, good evening everyone. Then I'll just start again with a written question that I received here by email for this Satsang.
"It is always said that we are all one. Yes, and when I have a wonderful experience, then we are all one, then these are all our experiences, everyone likes me. But if I have to go through a lot of intense pain, then no one sees it or everyone is happy not to have anything to do with it. Then nobody wants anything to do with it, then we're not all one. And you say that if you make friends with your feelings, then you feel at one with everyone. You know me, can you say something about that?"
Thank you for that question, thank you.
Yes, I would like to say two things about that.
There's something that people tend to misunderstand.
When I say: "When I welcome my feelings, when I am completely at peace with them, with what I feel and how it is for me, when I can really say yes to them and be at peace with them ", then it is as if there is no separation between me and the feelings.
And the more I experience this, the more I actually feel that there is no separation between me and other people. And also in practical terms, it becomes clearer and clearer that we are all going through the same thing, that we all have the same challenges, that no one is better or worse than anyone else.
So when I say: "then I feel one with everyone", it is a very deep connection that I feel inside. It has nothing to do with the outside. It doesn't mean that everyone suddenly likes me and everyone listens to me or that I have an easier time with other people. That does happen over time, but that's not what I mean. It's an inner experience, an inner recognition, that I'm talking about.
And you may know that too. If you have these difficult feelings, that have been with you for so many decades, if you have... you certainly have your moments where you are at peace with them.... and then you feel at one with the feelings that otherwise cause you so much pain, and you feel at one with everything inside you.
But how it is with our fellow human beings is another matter. That is not what is meant at all.
Normally, people understand this as "I am one with everyone", that I can tell everyone my joy and everyone my pain. But most people don't want to know anything about your joy and even less about your pain. It's just the way it is. People are just like that.
That's not what it means. And it's not really a problem either, it's not really a bad thing. I know that you've been dealing with the pain you're talking about for a very long time. And so often you have experienced being listened to. So many times there were people you could share this with, but it didn't help. The pain is still there, it doesn't go away. The pain only changes very slowly when you accept your pain as if it were your own child.
If I accept my own pain and my feelings as if they were my own children, then it becomes easier for me. This is something we have to do for ourselves within ourselves. Of course, it helps if we have dear people who stand by us or accompany us through it, but ultimately, only our own friendship with these things that are inside us helps. That is the only thing that helps in the long run.
And if you then get a reflection from people on the outside... if you experience that they don't want anything to do with your pain, then it's actually a good reminder for you: "Ah, yes, I'm the one who has to deal with this pain." It's just the way it is. And everyone has their own pain that they have to make friends with, and everyone has to do that task for themselves, and there is no getting around it. And I know it's not easy. I know you've been dealing with it for a long time. And that's why I keep encouraging you to be infinitely patient with yourself.
And when you can make more and more peace with these things that are within you, you feel truly connected to those around you, but regardless of what they are doing or not doing, whether they are listening to you or not, whether they like you or not. I also feel connected to the people who have a hard time with me or who are not nice to me at all, I also feel deeply connected to them because I know their pain, from my own experience, because I have made friends with my own pain. So it's an inner matter.
And it's just like this: most people don't want to have anything to do with your pain, and although that sounds terrible at first glance, it's actually a good thing because it belongs to you and no one can take it away from you, no one, no human being.
I love you.
Simone, should I go on?
[Simone:] There's a question now, Mikael.
[Mikael:] Yes, please.
[Simone:] I like to read it out, from Boris. "Here are feelings of strong anger and deep sadness. I can turn to it at times, but there's also a lot of distraction, and I withdraw. There's the idea that I have to force myself into contact."
[Mikael:] Yes, thank you.
The most important thing for us, and the thing that makes it easiest for us, is that we allow ourselves to be as we are. You hear that you should feel your feelings because that makes it easier, and of course that's true. But first of all, you have to accept yourself as you are. And sometimes you can feel the feelings. Sometimes you have the strength, the capacity, the space within you, and sometimes not.
It is enough if you do what you can do. Nothing more is necessary. You know, one moment you feel strong enough to welcome that anger or that sadness. And other times you realize: "Oh, no, now I don't want to have anything to do with it." And then love that, accept that, then accept this "now I've had enough", say yes to that: "Ah, now I've had enough, okay, that's allowed to be there too."
Then you realize you want to distract yourself, you turn on the TV. Okay! And I really mean it. Say yes to it, be yourself honestly and courageously, just as you are, without judging it. You know, this saying yes to what's there right now is meant in a very direct way, always what floats to the top, what's closest to you right now, that's what it's about for you at that moment.
It's not some kind of idea: "I know, I have anger in me and I have to feel it all the time." That's also just an idea from the mind. If the anger is there right now, then feel it. And if, a short time later, there is a completely different feeling, namely: "I want to be left alone now, even by the anger", then allow it. It's really that simple. We are always closest to ourselves in this way, and that's what it's all about.
And you can't even imagine that at first, because we are so used to thinking in such categories: "I should or I ought to now...", but we can really be who we are, in every moment, over and over again, always anew, in every moment. And that is the great relief. I do this every day, all the time. There are always moments when I realize: "Yes, but I can't do what I thought I should do right now. I just can't right now. It would be sensible, it would be important, but now, now it's time for something else."
And then I have to be true to that, and then I'm at peace again, and that's when I have the most energy, and that's when I'm at my best, and then I might not get as much done as I think I should as Mikael and as a person, but then I'm as capable as I can be because I'm as much at peace with myself as I can be. And that simply requires you to look again and again: "What is it like for me now?" And then the anger has had enough, perhaps it wants to be left alone, and then something else comes along.
So it's not helpful to somehow make a concept out of it, but to keep looking at it, again and again, after every breath, so to speak, quite relaxed, quite normal.
These things take time, you know. Basically, it's a journey towards making friends with ourselves. That's why we feel the feelings, because then we get closer and closer to ourselves, but that's also why we have to accept ourselves in every moment as we feel them, and that's how we get closer and closer to ourselves, always, always closer, very gradually.
Thank you Boris, thank you. I love these immediate, so human questions, thank you.
[Simone:] There's a new question, Mikael. I'll read it out, from Gabi. "Dear Mikael, thank you so much for being there for me. What is the purpose of pets? Are they really helpful for us humans? I'm thinking about getting a cat so that I'm not so alone and have someone to cuddle."
[Mikael:] Oh thank you, thank you, Gabi.
I have two things to say about that. One is: don't worry about whether pets are really useful or not. If you feel the desire to try it out right now, then do it. If you're unsure, wait a little longer. And then just do it.
You know, you can go online now and google whether pets are really useful, and then you'll find people who say, "It was totally useful for me, and it's such a blessing," and others say, "It was a total bust, it didn't do me any good at all." It all depends on what it's like for you. That's why I can't tell you whether pets are useful. I can tell you right now about the pets I experience and what it's like for me.
But that only applies to me, it doesn't apply to anyone else. So do what you want to do. That sounds pretty reckless, but I would like to encourage you to do so. And I think cats are great, and I also think pets are a great thing. I grew up with a few pets as a child. I was lucky, I had parents who didn't have a problem with that. We had all kinds of critters! We had, I don't know, five cats, a dog, three dogs in a row, but only one at a time.
We had hamsters, white mice, fish, birds, all at the same time. And it was great. I learned a lot and I loved them. And now, here in the house where I live, right now we have three cats, they are so cuddly and so, so just totally lovely. The children love the cats, I love them. I don't know if you can hear them in the background, but the children are calling the cats to their meal right now and I can hear them.
And you know, there's something really great about animals: animals don't think.
And this energy, this peace, reminds us of something we have forgotten. And that's why animals are a real therapy option for people who don't have an easy time with themselves, because animals don't have a problem with themselves. They don't know these questions, these thoughts. They don't know this level within themselves.
Sometimes animals are angry, and then they are angry. They don't think about whether this or that is wrong. Sometimes they are very cuddly, sometimes they are scared, but they don't think about it. They are just the way they are. And we humans sense that, and it is a very good influence for many people.
Maybe you know that too... sometimes there's a cat lying next to me on the sofa, and then I look at it, it throws itself onto the sofa, relaxes and sleeps for as long as it wants, it doesn't think anything. And then you look at this cat and think: "It would be so nice to be a cat." Yes, being as natural as you are right now: it's just a great example. Yes. Thank you for the question. The only difficult thing with cats is finding the right name, but I'm sure you can think of something.
[Simone:] Gabi has a short additional question.
[Mikael:] Yes, please.
[Simone:] "Am I distracting myself with this?"
[Mikael:] If you're distracting yourself with it, distract yourself with it. It's not forbidden to distract yourself. We take it all very seriously. We hear something and then we think life is a very difficult, serious thing and we have to do things seriously and straightforwardly in some way.
We can really be who we are. We can really shape and live life in the way that is possible for us. Not everything is possible for you, but if it is possible for you to have a cat and you have the desire for it, then of course you can do it. I often distract myself. Sometimes I realize: this is not good for me. Sometimes I enjoy it. And so I dance with life, with the day.
What we have completely forgotten in our modern world is idleness, doing nothing, wasting time, just lying around and enjoying, reading a good book, simply lying in the sun or under a tree, completely useless and lazy.
These are incredibly important activities. We've all completely forgotten about them. But when we see someone who we consider holy, yes, they can do it. With him it's a cool thing, he sits under a tree all day, and that's okay, but we're not allowed to do that. That's how we think. Of course we're allowed to.
So, cats are simply a great distraction, a great inspiration.
And there's nothing wrong with distraction and doing nothing wrong with being lazy, if that's what you like.
Sometimes you catch yourself taking things very seriously, including the questions you're asking right now. Sometimes you realize that within yourself, and this seriousness is not necessary, although of course we all have it. That's just the way it is, which is why I encourage you to be quite casual and relaxed about such questions. Thank you Gabi.
[Simone:] Boris and Gabi thank you very much, Mikael.
[Mikael:] Oh, thank you, Boris. Thank you, Gabi. Thank you, thank you.
[Simone:] And Boris has another question. And that is: "Do you think there is a soul purpose that one can discover or unfold? Or is that just a concept to escape the present?"
[Mikael:] There is such a thing as a soul purpose, but it is the same for everyone. You don't need to discover it. Well... most people have no idea about it and then discover it at some point. But I don't think that what you're talking about, this search for your own soul's purpose, which is different from the purpose of other souls and your own calling and all that sort of thing... I don't think that has any kind of importance.
We come here into this life as a body, as a human being, with a specific task, and the task is the same for all of us. And that is to get lost in this world - so far so good, we have all managed that - and then to discover ourselves so that we can then experience who we really are, deep down, as a soul, ultimately as God. That is the way back to paradise, the way back to Heaven. And the task is the same for all of us, and it fills our entire lives, many lives even.
And what you've probably heard, these are distractions. Yes, we love to discover something which only applies to me and which is my own unique path, which is completely different from that of others. Somehow we love things like that. We love tasks, and there's nothing wrong with that.
We love it as people. We love our work, our tasks, we love fulfilling tasks and getting things done. But when it comes to: "Why am I here in this life? Why is my soul in my body? Why did it come here in the first place?" We all have the same task. How the path of life then takes shape on this journey of discovery is different for each person.
It really is individual, but we don't need to ask ourselves any questions. We don't need to find out. We simply live our lives, and life shows us where to go. Your life shows you where it's going for you, simply by what happens in your life, what you have energy for and what you don't, how you feel and how you don't, so life guides and steers you, like a river being guided through the riverbed.
You don't need to know much about it. In my life it is different. But the destination, where it's going... all these rivers flow to the same destination. All these souls that we are have the same task. That's why we can support each other so beautifully in it. We all have the same task, but this task is so simple... It's not easy for us to complete the task, it's a bit tricky, but it's not complicated.
Once you've understood what it's about, there's really only one thing left to do: be patient and learn to be here, meditate, go within. It's totally simple. The task and the way to get there is really very, very simple. It only takes time, but exactly this simplicity is something that our mind, our ego, our "I" does not like at all. And our mind, our ego, loves it complicated. And what you mentioned there smells like this to me. It's just my opinion that I'm saying here. But luckily I've always stayed away from such things in this life. I always wanted to know directly.
To put it in a nutshell: you don't have to find out what your soul's task is, that comes naturally. Your task is to find out who you really are; to discover your soul. You don't need to discover your soul's purpose. You don't even know what this soul is. You have no idea what that means. And people who ask themselves such questions really have no idea either. We don't even know ourselves.
My guru Swamiji, who teaches the Samarpan Meditation, talks about it very often. He says: "Meditation strengthens our soul within us, and then it slowly gets bigger and bigger, stronger and stronger." And then we begin to perceive it. And then we begin to experience that we are a soul, and that is all; when we become a soul, so to speak, inwardly. We don't need to know what the task of this soul is.
The task is to discover this soul, to nourish it. All the rest comes naturally, so there are no more questions. But the head doesn't like it: forget these questions and just meditate, and then continue to live year after year in the certainty that this is the right way, the way I'm doing it. It's that simple. But there's not much to be gained for the ego and that's why most people give this simplicity a wide berth. Thank you, Boris.
[Simone:] Jeannette Nicole has a question for you, Mikael. I'll read it out.
[Mikael:] Yes, I'd love to. Hello Jeannette Nicole.
[Simone:] "Dear Mikael, can you say something about emptiness and fullness?"
[Mikael:] Please repeat that. I'll turn up the volume a little on my end. I turned it down too much earlier, I'm sorry. Please repeat it again, Simone.
[Simone:] You're welcome. "Dear Mikael, can you say something about emptiness and fullness?"
[Mikael:] Emptiness and fullness are two great words that are perfect for posts like on Facebook that everyone looks at. "Emptiness" is something you hear again and again, and everyone wants to have abundance, whatever that is. Sounds great.
I don't try to think in those categories. For me, it's about living as simply as possible. Sometimes I perceive an astonishing emptiness within myself. Sometimes it's wonderful, and then I feel it, and then I enjoy it, and then I feel carried by it or by whatever. It's different every time, so you shouldn't talk about it too much.
And I've made it a rule to just be with what's there right now. I don't long for emptiness, but I don't long for abundance either. Sometimes I feel so blessed by life, as if I were a King and as if this whole planet was created just for me, that's how it feels sometimes. Such happiness, such amazement. Maybe you could call it abundance, I don't know. That's one moment. The next moment I feel something else again. And the way I try to live is completely down to earth. Do you know what I mean?
I try not to worry about things that are not my experience right now. Sometimes emptiness is there, and then it leaves again, and of course I let it go. And then something else comes. And in this detachment from these things that you experience inside yourself, and of course also in the detachment from the things that you experience on the outside and that come and go, be it people or things or something else, something completely different then opens up, and that is what is actually beautiful.
Now we could also call this abundance again, but I am very careful with such words. Even if I don't say these words to other people, but only have them in my own head, they immediately conjure up images, concepts, ideas, wishes or hopes.
That's why my advice is not to attach too much importance to such things, especially not to such meaningful words as emptiness and fullness.
What you experience inside yourself, as you probably already know, cannot be described in words.
Words simply cannot describe it. Even very mundane feelings cannot really be described by words. And when you start... But we have a habit of putting everything into words. That is our thinking. When meditating, during Samarpan Meditation, you have your attention here at the crown chakra, and something quite funny happens.
Thoughts and words are located here, at the level of the brow chakra, at the level of the third eye. And in the past, it wasn't even possible for people to go to the crown chakra. It simply wasn't possible, and nobody knew anything about it. And now we live in a time when it is suddenly possible. And it's now suddenly so normal that we don't even know what kind of revolution it is. But if you want to go there with your attention, this very simple and mundane exercise of resting up here with your attention, at that moment I can't think.
There are no words in me because my attention is a chakra too high for words. Of course, a few seconds or a few minutes later I find myself back in thought, busy with words again. And then I realize, "Oops, now I'm somewhere else." Then I go back up here while meditating, and then it becomes completely silent again, there are no words. And in this wordless space, we experience it as it really is. There are no words. Fullness, emptiness, is meaningless there. And I'm sure you know that too.
The wonderful thing about life is not that we achieve something very specific, such as abundance, but that we learn to be, not to experience the world in our thoughts, but to be empty and then experience it. And then everything is incredible. Everything is very simple, unspectacular and yet simply incredible. I don't know whether that makes sense now. Those two words have inspired me quite a bit. But I don't know whether this answer is of any use to you, but it's what has just come to me. Thank you.
[Simone:] Mikael, there are currently no questions in the chat, but Sunny wanted to say: "Oh yes, I could just sit and do nothing all day."
[Mikael:] Yes, and if you feel like it and if you have the opportunity, wow!
And that doesn't mean that anyone else should do it that way. It doesn't mean that Mikael says you should sit around all day, but if you feel like it and you have the opportunity, great! I don't often feel like it. I just do what I feel like doing. And that's the wonderful thing. The cats we have here actually spend eighty percent of their time just sitting around lazily, and they love it. Yes, let me see what other questions I have here, Simone.
"Dear Mikael, I'm glad you're here. How nice that I was led to you last year. I have a question about a special form of love, the one where it only works when both partners rest in their being. Then one loses oneself in the eyes of the other, one's own divine spark is mirrored and one feels connected to everything. However, as soon as doubts and fears arise, it no longer works. Have you ever experienced this?"
Yes, thank you for the question. I wrote down the question from the last or second last YouTube chat, there was no time for it, but I thought it was so beautiful that I wanted to read it out now.
Actually, it's like this... You're writing about love. Actually, love is only and exclusively when we are at rest in our own being.
What people normally call love has nothing to do with love. That is not what you mean here. This "Oh, I love you" is actually an "I want you" or "I need you".
But love has nothing at all to do with wanting or needing. Love is simply this energy that you feel flowing to the other person, to the whole world, through you, and you feel it when you are at peace within yourself, otherwise you don't feel it. If you want something or need something, then you are not in this space, and then you might feel something that is called love, but it has nothing to do with love at all.
And you say: "When the doubts come, it's gone again." It's not that doubt destroys love, but that when we are in doubt, we are not resting within ourselves, but rather we are in the head, then we are in our thoughts, then we are on a completely different level, and that has nothing to do with love. Love cannot and will not go there, to this level. And as soon as you let go of the doubts and manage to simply rest within yourself again and not take the thoughts and doubts seriously, then love is there again.
It was there before, it was there all the time. We just can't feel it when we are preoccupied with our thoughts, with our ego. And the writer had an additional question, which I would also like to answer briefly: "If you practise Samarpan Meditation for a longer period of time, can it be that you then feel the crown chakra permanently? Could it be a slight, painful tingling sensation? And what does that mean?"
Yes, it can be. My experience is that I can feel this place up here, which the Indians call the crown chakra, better and better over the years. And sometimes, when it's particularly easy for me to rest there, even often in Online Satsang like now or when I'm making a video, it's often very pronounced for me, then it tingles there all the time, there's really something going on there.
At other times I don't feel it so much, but when I remember: "Oh, I could go into the crown chakra with my attention", which is what you do during Samarpan Meditation, then it starts tingling again in no time at all. This chakra is then activated and the energy there starts to flow again. That's a beautiful and good thing. For me, at least, what you are describing is normal. I wouldn't describe it as painful, I find it rather interesting, this sensation. I don't even know how I would describe it, but something is happening. I can clearly feel it. Thank you very much for your two questions.
[Simone:] Mikael, Jeanette, Nicole has another question for you.
[Mikael:] Yes, I would love to.
[Simone:] She wants to know: "How was your awakening?"
[Mikael:] Wow, what a question.
I can say two things about that.
What is commonly called awakening is, I think, certain experiences that you have as a person, or a certain experience.
And there is an experience that I once had that was very significant for me, and I could probably call it my awakening experience.
It was twenty-five years ago now.
My computer keeps making a lot of noise here, I have to do something about it now or it'll keep bugging me. So, now it's quiet.
It was about twenty-five years ago, I guess. I had an experience where, for the first time... I don't know how to describe it. I was in a space where there was nothing. There was no more "me", there was nothing, the world was gone and it was vast and completely peaceful. It was a remarkable experience. I didn't make much of it, I didn't take it seriously, I didn't make a big deal out of it. That just wasn't my style. But I've never forgotten that experience.
Today I can actually always feel that space, more or less, but back then it was really an overwhelming, remarkable experience for me. But in recent times, people have asked me this question more often, and when I think about my life, I think of things that I have experienced before, where I also think: yes, actually something was awakened in me years before, where I was simply touched by something, where I simply felt something that I had never felt before. A connection with a part of me that I had never felt before.
So it's not so easy to answer this question clearly. But it is like this, and that's why I said at the beginning that I would like to answer it on two levels: I don't attach much importance to these so-called enlightenment experiences or enlightenment, because for me they are more like symptoms of something that happens anyway. I feel that it is not through an enlightenment experience that something decisive can happen in life, but the way I see it is that we go through a certain development, and on this path of development things change in us very gradually and continuously.
And during these changes, we occasionally have new inner experiences. But these experiences are the consequence of what is already happening. That's why we don't need to take them so seriously, nor do we need to wait for them. We develop, whether we have a great experience or not. Development happens. It's like when you sneeze. You sneeze when you have a cold. Sneezing is not important at all, it's just part of having a cold. And whether you sneeze or not, the cold is still there. And so it is with the spiritual awakening, in this phase of life that you are probably in right now.
And that's how it is in my life: this phase... I could say it started twenty-five years ago or maybe twenty-eight years ago with this very first experience, which I just mentioned. But you know, the closer you look, the more you realize: "That's not true at all. Actually, my whole life has somehow been going in this direction in a strange and magical way." You don't even know where to begin to find a starting point. In reality, this life is one long process towards a completely new way of being.
And it's a long journey that takes time, just like everything in life takes time.
But it's hard to talk about it, most people don't want to hear about it, but these memorable experiences, people remember them, you can tell stories about them, you can write books about them, but in reality they are not important, these experiences, are not important at all. In fact, many people don't experience their awakening in the form of such a concise experience, such a turning point, but rather as a gradual development. I believe that for most people it is more like this; a completely natural development.
And when I had this experience over twenty-five years ago... I was very lucky because I was at the time... I went to therapy back then, and I was lucky because I was with a very gifted, thoroughly enlightened therapist, I know that today. And he didn't take it seriously either. He knew... he knew from his own experience. He had gone all the way to the end. He was totally down to earth, down to earth, calm and quiet. And when I had the experience, he didn't make anything of it. On the contrary, he acted as if nothing big had happened.
And that's true, I know that today. And I'm grateful because I didn't make a big deal out of it. I just forgot about it again. And a short time later, I came to my spiritual master Soham, and he was just as bone-dry as I was, and he wasn't interested in all these things that are usually made such a fuss about in the spiritual world. The only thing he did and still does, for decades with wisdom and love and patience: to get people out of all these stories and all these great stories and bring them back into the moment, again and again.
And then what this life is really about happens. It happens gradually, very gradually. That's why I don't often talk about these awakening experiences because I simply don't think they are important. What is much more important is what we do every day to promote this development that we find ourselves in. It's like... You know, you're in a human body, and it needs food and it needs sleep. And if you take proper care that it gets food and enough sleep and rest, then it thrives and then it does well.
And this soul development that we find ourselves in is something that we can also promote if we want to. But this is something that, just like eating and sleeping, requires continuous daily care, for example meditating; for example ignoring thoughts and being in the moment as much as possible, as much as possible... preferably, if you can and like to, just rest in the crown chakra and live from there. And then you promote this spiritual growth. It happens all by itself, but over time.
And this is simply an ongoing task, unspectacular, but deeply natural and totally simple and feasible for everyone. But these great events, these stories, are of course much more interesting. And I sometimes have the suspicion that they are also so attractive to people because most of them actually want an instant solution like this. They wait for some event and then they think: "Ah, now everything is done", but life isn't like that, people are deluding themselves. Enough talking about it. Thank you for your question.
[Simone:] There's another question from André, Mikael, which I'll read out now.
[Mikael:] Yes, please. Hello André.
[Simone:] "Hello Mikael. How can I rest in Being, and set myself apart? I'm currently practising being truthful with friends and I am experiencing a breakup of contact as a result."
[Mikael:] Yes, being truthful is one of those things. There is only one truthfulness that really matters and that is that you are true to yourself; that you are honest and truthful with yourself; that you don't fool yourself; that you know: what is important to me? What you say to other people or not is a completely different story.
You know, it's like this: when we start to discover ourselves, when we start to find out what we actually want and how we feel, that's a total revolution at the beginning. I still remember how I started to learn this. That's when I first realized that I had no idea at all that I had needs and desires and feelings myself. I have always lived only for the wishes and things of others. I was quite good at that, that's just how I learned it.
And then it's simply a revolution when you start to discover yourself and discover your own point of view and you discover: "This is what I want, this is what I don't want." And then you feel the need to say that to people because you expect them to accept it. But they don't, as you are experiencing right now. It's not their business at all. The only thing that matters is that you realize what it's like for you. And then you dance with the world. You have to find out how you dance with the world.
It's not easy at first.
We discover these things that are so important to us for the first time in our lives. And then we want others to see us the way we are just getting to know ourselves. We want others to accept us.
We want... Especially from someone we love, we want them to love us in the same way, to accept us and say: "Yes, that's okay, you can be like that."
Normally, in this phase of development, people experience exactly the opposite: rejection, difficulties, friction.
But as I said, this is a phase that I know so well. It's a time when you want to talk about these things all the time. You want to explain yourself, you want to show yourself because you want to be seen, because you want to be understood and accepted. I totally understand it, I know the times well.
But it's not the job of others to accept you or understand you. And after a while, I noticed something really interesting in my own development. I realized that I wanted so much for my girlfriend or whoever, my friends, to accept me for who I am and all these things that I somehow discover that they approve of, because... It took me a long time to realize that in reality I myself had a hard time accepting the guy I was discovering more and more, Mikael as he really is... that I had a hard time accepting him; that I had a hard time just letting him be who he is.
And then I was quite surprised when I gradually, very slowly, realized what a task it was to let myself be who I am. And the more I learned that, very gradually, the less I wanted to talk about it with other people, and it's no longer necessary. And the more you learn to be good to yourself as you are, to love yourself unquestioningly as you are, as you get to know yourself more and more.... The more you succeed in doing this, the more you simply won't care about other people's reactions or opinions of you.
And then it becomes easier with other people. Then you no longer have to talk about yourself, and you no longer seek validation. You know how it is: when you seek confirmation, when you seek approval, you get the opposite. People can't help themselves. It just doesn't work that way. I said at the beginning: the only person who has to like you is yourself.
And when you are at peace with yourself, more and more, when you get to know yourself better, and in my case it took a long time, it took years, until I started to really be at peace with myself. And then it became easier and easier for me with other people, with my girlfriend, with friends, because I simply didn't need anything from them anymore.
And when you're in the phase you're in right now, you have the feeling that you're being rejected for who you are, but it's not true. What people react to, and the closer a person is to you, the more vehement the reaction will be, that's completely normal.... what people react to is the search for confirmation, the search for approval, the search for harmony.
You have certain expectations of those around you in this phase: to encourage you in this shaky time you're in. And nobody likes that. Nobody likes that. If at some point you stop looking for that from others, if you just be who you are, then people will react to who you really are. And there's never really a problem with that.
That's my experience. I think I'm completely weird, but somehow people don't seem to have a problem with me anymore. But in the past... I used to go through the world wanting acceptance! My God. And then you don't get it. It doesn't work. It's as if life forbids other people from helping you because life throws you back onto yourself. That just reminds me of the first question I answered earlier.
You can only give yourself this acceptance, this confirmation. Everything else is useless, and it's almost as if your fellow human beings simply can't give it to you even if they wanted to. They just don't want to. It's unpleasant.
You're in this totally cool phase now where you're starting to get to know yourself, and be patient with yourself and don't take what you're experiencing with people too seriously. It has nothing... They do not react to how you are as a person and as a soul. This is just a difficult time. Just try, if you can, to expect as little as possible from your fellow human beings.
And love yourself as best you can. That's the key. Yes, and of course, if you like doing the meditation, if you know it, that's the burner for me. I spent seventeen years learning to accept myself with my spiritual master Soham. I am so grateful to him, it took me a long time. And then, after seventeen years with my master, this meditation came to us. And since then... it's like a highway. It's so quick. You don't have to sit with the master for seventeen years. Now, two decades later, the world is ready for something like Samarpan Meditation.
It's been around for eight hundred years, but the world wasn't ready for it yet. Now it is ripe, now we as humans are ripe for it, and now you can do this meditation, half an hour every day, that's all it is. And you develop a connection to yourself and a peace with yourself in such a natural, unspectacular and quick, deep way, it's incredible. That's why I talk about it so much, because I've come such a long way, and now I realize what a tool it is. As I said, it didn't exist before, but it does now, and I can only recommend it to you. It's really easy, natural and fast.
It's the easiest way I know of to come to yourself and be at peace with yourself.
Thank you. Thank you for your question.
[Simone:] Mikael, there's another question from Fabian.
[Mikael:] Yes, hello Fabian.
[Simone:] Fabian asks, "Is there a soul?"
[Mikael:] Yes, that's a good question. I'm glad you're asking yourself that and now you have to find the answer. It's an interesting question. The fact that we have to ask this question at all says a lot.
And the answer I could give you is of no use to you. I know the answer, but you don't know it yet. Normally, if you ask yourself "who am I", you will say "well, I'm Fabian. I'm twenty-eight years old, I have fair skin, two legs, two arms, so and so is tall, my profession is so and so". That's Fabian. But that's not the whole truth, there's still something more to discover.
In reality, we have nothing to do with this body, and when you hear me say that, you might think: "That sounds really weird. That's me, who else?" But there's something else. There is something that was here before this body was here. You existed before that, so to speak. And when this body is gone, you are still here.
That is what is called the soul, the innermost being.
And the Samarpan Meditation that I just talked about... When Swamiji talks about it, he says it like this... He says: "Discover your soul." That's what Samarpan Meditation is for. Discover what you really are. At the moment you may think you are the body, and if someone else says something else, you think they are crazy. But through meditation you discover in a short time that there is something completely different, and then a whole new life starts. Then you start to discover your true purpose, your true identity.
Then you relax. Then all these endless challenges and problems of worldly physical life no longer affect you so much, because you are in connection with what you are in reality, with a completely new power, with a completely new way of being. But listening to this is of no use. You may resonate with what you are hearing, but you have to discover it yourself. And it's easy. As I said, it's easy these days. A few decades ago it was a mammoth task.
That is the blessing of this time, that this is now changing, that it is now possible for us normal people in society to discover this. Is there a soul? What a question. If you are interested in the answer, then I recommend Samarpan Meditation. It's super simple, but it really is something. And then you will discover the soul. Then you will discover who you really are, and everything will change. I promise you. You'll still look the same, your body won't change at all, but you'll suddenly know something completely different.
Thank you for this beautiful question.
[Simone:] André thanks you, Mikael: "Thank you. They are so valuable, your words. Yes, and I do the Samarpan Meditation every day.
[Mikael:] Oh, nice. That makes me happy.
[Simone:] No other questions for you in the chat at the moment.
[Mikael:] Yes, then I'll see what else I have. By the way, Samarpan Meditation has nothing at all to do with me personally. I think you all know that, but I would like to mention it from time to time. I didn't invent it, it has nothing to do with me. I only talk about it so much because I have simply learned in this life how helpful and valuable it is. I mentioned this earlier: after seventeen years with my spiritual master, and I had the best master you could wish for, I was so lucky in this life... and yet: when this meditation came into my life, something completely new began.
And that's why I like talking about it so much, but not because I invented it, not because it comes from me. It comes from the Himalayas. Shivkrupanand Swami, whom we all call Swamiji, brings it. In Germany, Austria and Switzerland there's the samarpanmeditation.de association, which is responsible for spreading and teaching it. These are the people who are officially involved, so to speak. I'm just talking as a meditator and I want to share my experiences.
I just want everyone to hear about it, and if you like it, then give it a try, I can only recommend it to everyone. So, now I'll see what other questions I have over here.
"Who actually decides when a person is a guru? It feels to me, that you are my guru. When does a person know, when do you know, when do I know or when did Swamiji know that he is a guru? Do I feel or sense it then?"
What a question.
A guru is a being, a person through whom God becomes tangible for you, one through whom God comes to you. For most people, they worship this person as God for a certain, sometimes long time, simply because they can experience the divine directly through this person. This is a guru, an infinite gift. Jesus was a guru. Those people who came close to him, they could feel God, Heaven, unimaginable, simply because he was nearby.
And then it's like this... Swamiji, my guru, he describes it, he says... He says of himself: "My only goal is to make your soul your guru." He doesn't want to be your guru forever. He doesn't care about that at all. Samarpan Meditation helps people to discover their soul, and then the soul becomes ever more powerful, ever clearer, takes over more and more of the say in your life.
No longer the intellect, no longer the mind, but the soul takes over more and more of the say in life, quite naturally, by itself. And then there comes a time when we no longer have any questions, when the guru on the outside, who was so important to us for a certain short time in our lives, becomes unimportant because we then have the guru within ourselves. Then we become our own guru. The questions disappear. The fear disappears.
We love the guru, our own guru, just as much as before, but we no longer have any questions, we are simply here.
And this is a development that goes on and on.
The guru within begins to grow and continues to grow. I haven't found an end to it yet.
And no one I know says of themselves: "I am a guru".
It's other people who make you a guru, because it describes their own experience. That's why no one can say: "I am a guru". It depends on you who is a guru. You have to know that. The guru himself doesn't care.
Guru is not a job title. Guru is something that describes what happens to you when you are in the vicinity of a certain being. That's how I see it. I'm sure there are other descriptions, but that's how I experience it with my guru and with myself.
And it's like this: it's possible that you feel things through me that you haven't felt before.
I started making these videos because I want to tell people about things that are working in my life and that I have found to be so helpful and so beneficial and so real and so workable and so of practical value in life. But these are things that normal people... I have experienced over decades that normal people don't really want to have anything to do with. For example, a real guru. You know, maybe you have certain experiences with me that you haven't had before.
But I can tell you: when you meet the person who is a guru for me, it's a completely different dimension. I don't want to say that anyone should go to the guru who plays this role in my life. Everyone has to decide that for themselves, everyone goes their own way. I just want to say, if I play such a role in your life: I am a small light and I am very lucky to have a giant sun in my life.
And if you appreciate this reflection of this huge sun that perhaps shines through me into your life, if you appreciate that, then I'm totally happy. But there's even more. There is a big sun, the one that I also let shine on me. And that's how I experience Swamiji too, by the way. He also never talks about himself as a guru. He only talks about his gurus all the time and about this incredible grace and the huge sun that he experiences there.
Ultimately, none of this has anything to do with people. If you experience something because you listen to me or because you watch a video of me, that has nothing to do with me, you know. Something else comes through and that's what you then eventually... That's why Swamiji says: he makes you, your soul, your guru, ultimately... that which flows through Swamiji to me, which perhaps also flows from me to you, that also flows in you.
In reality, you don't need anyone else for that. At first, until we discover it, until we have approached it, until we have recognized it, until we dare to let it grow. It just takes a little while, but we actually have it ourselves. That's why everyone becomes their own guru at some point.
What a question, I think it can only be answered completely inadequately, but I still like to talk about it in detail. Thank you.
[Simone:] Mikael, do you have one last little question to finish?
[Mikael:] Yes, we have a few minutes left. Thank you for the hint about the time. Very, very good. Let me have a look... I have a question here that I think fits just in the time left. Unfortunately, I still have a lot of questions that I don't have time for today. I'm really sorry. I am so happy about all these questions. I'll have to make another video in a few days where I simply answer a lot more questions.
"Dear Mikael, in one of your videos you talk about something that happens to me almost every time I meditate. I then have the feeling that meditating somehow won't work out that day. And then I think: it's not going to work today. I might as well stop. But when I open my eyes, I'm amazed that exactly half an hour has passed, even though I had the feeling that only a few minutes had passed. Where am I during that time? I can't remember anything. Do you know the answer to that?"
One question more beautiful than the next.
It's called meditation. You know, we say: "We do the Samarpan Meditation". We sit down for half an hour, but then we sit there and focus our attention on the crown chakra, and that's what we call meditation. But that is basically the description of an exercise that you do. But the state of meditation is what you describe. Sometimes you sit there and you have no idea where the time has gone. You just can't explain it.
When you're in meditation, you don't know anything about it because there's no one there to remember. That's highly amazing, but it's also my experience. What you're describing is exactly my experience, even with this feeling that nothing will happen today. We always have this idea that if I meditate well, it means that my thoughts disappear more and more and that I become more and more still and just swim around blissfully in silence somewhere, but that's not true at all.
The more I go inwards, the more subtle I become, the more attentive I become, the more I notice what disturbances are still there. This is actually a good sign. The thoughts become louder and louder, and the itching of the body becomes clearer and clearer, because I become more and more awake and more and more attentive. And that's why it becomes easier and easier to go to the crown chakra. But we cannot judge the degree of our stillness, because the more still we become, the more we perceive.
That is why Soham says... not Soham, Swamiji keeps saying: "Don't think about how your meditation is." Almost all people have the feeling: "It's not working at all." We can't judge it. It's totally exciting. We can't judge it at all. I feel the same way. I've always had meditations where I have the feeling: "What kind of morning was that?" And then I open my eyes, and only after I have opened my eyes and try to notice my body again, only then do I realize how absorbed I actually was, and I ask myself: where am I?
I would like to say one more thing at the end. It is really, really helpful if you never stop the meditation early, no matter how it is, no matter how bad you think it is. As I said, you can't judge it, you can't. We are not in a position to judge the quality of our meditation, we cannot. But it's important never to stop it early, never, because otherwise that voice inside us that doesn't like meditation at all and that tells us all this garbage will be strengthened, and we don't want that. It doesn't matter how the meditation is like in your eyes.
Just be here, just keep meditating, stubbornly, very stubbornly. I only have two rules in this life: I meditate every morning, no matter what, no matter how I feel, no matter how little sleep I've had, no matter how sick I am, no matter what my head says. I meditate every morning, and always for half an hour, never less. And then, that what we meditate for... then this soul gets more and more power, more and more space within us. Nothing else matters. How meditation feels like is actually completely irrelevant.
I also made a video about it once, maybe you'll be interested. It's called... what's it called? "It's not about Stillness", I think that's what it's called, because a lot of people misunderstand it. So, we have to close. Unfortunately, time is up again. I could talk just as long once again right now. I feel the same way in Satsang as I do in meditation. I have no idea where the time flies. I don't know how that's possible at all. It's completely unfair that time flies so quickly in Satsang. Thank you for all these wonderful questions. Thank you very, very much.
Thank you so much. Thank you for being here. I love you.
Good night.