Online Satsang of March 12, 2024

[Dhyan Mikael:] Good evening.

I am glad that you are here. Welcome.

For those of you who are here for the first time, I would like to briefly speak about what we are doing here together.

If you want, you can ask me questions, either in writing in the YouTube chat or in the Zoom chat, or also verbally. You can raise a hand signal in Zoom, and then Simone will see that and take care of you. And then you can ask me a question and I'll talk a bit about it, if I can. And that's what we do for an hour and a half. And that's a wonderful thing for me, such a pleasure to receive these questions and to be able to talk about them.

I'm really looking forward to it. These evenings are really, really great. So, everything is very uncomplicated, and you can ask anything. They don't have to be highly spiritual questions, on the contrary. Often, the practical life questions are the most interesting ones. Simone, is there anything from your side that you could read out already?

[Simone:] No, Mikael, there's nothing at the moment.

[Mikael:] Yes, then I'll start. I've received a few questions by e-mail, and whenever there's no question live here, or no question yet, I'll read out an e-mail question and say something about it.

I'll read out the first question now.

How to deal with criticism

Link to topic in video at 2m06s

"Dear Mikael, thank you for your great work. I have a question. You say, we can be exactly as we are. But then how do you deal with criticism from a Guru, for example when you get hints about your own character flaws or about how you show yourself, how you speak and live? What do you do when all of this is criticized?

Are these your own weaknesses and shadows, or repressions which you don't see yourself? In our group, we talk about all our weaknesses in general, and then, together, we try to shed light on them to make us aware of our unconscious thought processes and character traits. I am sincerely grateful for an answer."

Yes, thank you for the question.

We all think we can help other people if we tell them what's wrong with them. And we all know how painful it is when someone tells us something: even the slightest hint hurts. But that's not the problem. The real problem with these things is that it doesn't help.

And I know groups like that, I've heard that from some people, especially in the spiritual field, and I think it's terrible. I just think it's terrible. It was many years ago, about twenty-six years ago, that I once had a partner who had such conversations with me, where you give each other feedback and say how you're doing with the other person and things like that. And that all sounds really, really great.

I don't think it does any good.

It's usually the case that we want to help the other person to become better or different because we have a problem with them and because we don't know how to look after ourselves, or because we don't trust ourselves to do so.

But once you start to learn to take care of yourself, to look after yourself, and that takes a little practice and some courage at first, then you can leave the other person as they are; then the other person doesn't need to change or improve.

You ask: how do you deal with such criticism?

I deal with it as follows: I don't listen to it. I'm radical about it.

Nobody says anything like that to me anymore, not since a long time. But when that still happened, I said: "Listen, I am the way I am. If you don't like it, leave me alone. But I am the way I am." And I'm not saying that because I think I'm so great. I'm not saying this because I think I have no faults. I have plenty of flaws. I'm a really weird guy, and I understand if there's a person who has a problem with me.

I understand that, but I am the way I am, and I can't change. I don't want to change either. I am constantly changing, but not because I want to, but by living, by feeling... that happens by itself. That's how I deal with it. You ask how to deal with it when this criticism and these evaluations come from a Guru... from your Guru, I suppose. I've been very lucky with my spiritual Master, Soham, who I've been with for twenty-four years now.

This is a true Master, a real Guru. A real Guru simply loves you. How he does that is different for everyone. He has never criticized me. He did say when he didn't like something. I worked for him. He wasn't just my Guru, I also worked for him as a member of his crew. Sometimes he told me if he didn't like something, but he never put it as personal criticism. He never said: "Mikael, you're so and so and that's not good, you should behave differently."

If he did say something, he would say: "Listen, it's important to me that this and that is done this way and that way", and then he would explain why, and then I learned something. But what I learned from him was: "Be the way you are. Don't change." Twenty-five years ago, he told me what Swamiji, my Guru, tells everyone today: "Don't change, be the way you are." And through this acceptance of yourself, change happens by itself, but in a natural way, all by itself.

And I am glad that my Master was and still is like that, and I am also glad that my Guru Swamiji is like that. I couldn't be with them otherwise. I am incredibly stubborn. I wouldn't listen to something like that, no matter how holy someone is. I just can't, I just don't want to.

It's much harder to face yourself. It's much harder to let yourself be the way you are, because we are idiots. I sometimes say that here in Online Satsang... sometimes I say: I'm just a completely stupid guy and I do really stupid things. Then, sometimes, people say: "but Mikael, that's not true". They think I'm so cool, but they don't know me as well as I know myself. And it's much more difficult to get to know yourself as you really are and to let yourself be the way you are. That's where you really learn surrender.

So, that's how I deal with it. I know that there are many Gurus who are very different, and I know that there are many disciples who are with them and who may need that. I really can't judge it. Here I can really only tell you my very personal experience, and that is: I can't do that. And I would like to repeat my personal experience at the end.

Maturing, growing, progressing, so to speak, happens by itself, simply by accepting ourselves as we are. It's a paradox. The whole world thinks you grow by hearing from others what you should change, but I think the opposite is the case. Thank you for your question. I'm very grateful that you asked it.

[Simone:] Mikael, there's a question from Sandra that she wants to ask you directly. [Dhyan Mikael] Yes, wonderful. Hello Sandra. Nice to have you here.

[Simone:] Can you turn up the sound, Sandra?

[Sandra:] Yes, I did. Hello Mikael.

Criticizing the partner

Link to topic in video at 11m47s

[Dhyan Mikael:] Hello, Sandra. Welcome.

[Sandra:] Mikael, I have a question. This actually fits quite well now. I had a situation today where I was the one criticizing, and I realize, well, how am I supposed to say this... it comes from my parents that this is simply my way of being in a relationship, what I've been taught: this constant criticism of each other. I know about it, and I don't like it. I know that tend to do this. And my life partner naturally complains about it, and that's totally understandable. So, I would like to change it.

[Dhyan Mikael:] But you can't.

[Sandra:] Yes, I find it so difficult because I don't realize it at the time. And then I can apologize for it, yes, and at the same time I thought today: but I am like that.

[Dhyan Mikael:] Yes, you are like that.

[Sandra:] What am I going to do now? Do you know? Because of course it's also very unsatisfactory for my relationship partner, I totally understand that.

[Dhyan Mikael:] Well, you know, you don't need to worry about him. He has to learn to deal with it himself. He's not a saint either. We're all a bit weird in our own way. He doesn't have to listen to it, but for some reason in his life he listens to it and he puts up with it. I've done that all my life, too. I never actually criticized my partner. I was the one who was always criticized, but only because I listened, only because I didn't know what I was like and because I didn't know what I wanted at all.

I almost invited it, so to speak. And I've experienced in all my relationships that at some point, sooner or later, usually sooner, my partner started to make it more or less clear to me what could be improved about me, and I believed it. And that's why they were able to tell me something at all. I just mentioned that no one has told me anything for a long time now, but not because I'm so terrible, but because I'm no longer open to it. I'm just not open to it anymore.

I wouldn't even listen to it, and the other one feels it, unconsciously; we're all connected somehow. And no one would come up with the idea of saying something like that to me these days. So, you don't need to worry about him, he'll get the lesson he needs in order to learn how to deal with his thing. And part of the lesson is that his partner is just like you are. But it's not nice for you.

[Sandra:] No. I hurt myself in the process.

[Dhyan Mikael:] Yes, it just doesn't feel nice, and you could perhaps experience something nice together at the same time. You create a distance and an injury through this behavior and that's just not fun. But we can't change. What you can do is to notice it and to try, and it's not so easy, to notice it without judgment: "Ah, look, that's me, again, I know that, ah yes." So, without judgment or, if you can, even with compassion: "Ah yes. Yes, that's how she is, Sandra. Yes, yes."

You may also know where it comes from, but that doesn't help you, of course, you're still like that... and to really let yourself be like that. The more you can give yourself permission to be the way you know yourself to be, the more will happen on its own. It takes a while, but it actually happens relatively quickly. As soon as you let go of the judgments and really get to know yourself as you are, things start to move on their own.

I sometimes have the feeling that we carry these things inside us from somewhere, and the only thing that is necessary is that they are allowed to be there, and that's how something starts to move: simply by experiencing it again and again, feeling it again and again, but with acceptance. That's why Swamiji says, for instance: "Don't change yourself". As soon as you try to change, you remain as you are. That's just the way it is. It doesn't work any other way.

And that's why I just said... this might sound really harsh, but if somebody... You know, I'm not easy either. But still: if someone were to tell me what's wrong with me, and what I was told would probably even be true... but I would still say: "Leave me alone. I am the way I am", because that's how I am, and I don't let anyone take this acceptance away from me or talk me out of it, not even my own head. And that's how I change. I don't even know how. I notice it with the children.

When you have children, things like that are particularly likely to come to the surface because they have no strength. You can just brush over them, it happens so quickly, and then you think: "For God's sake, what have I said – again?" And then I notice how I become more sensitive, gentler, lighter, year by year. All this old stuff evaporates, but not because I'm working on it. I love myself as best I can, as much as I can, even if I'm not proud of it. If I were proud of it, loving myself wouldn't be an art.

[Sandra:] Yes. That's true. Yes, I can already feel that it has a little more ease to it, yes.

[Dhyan Mikael:] And in a way, it's much more difficult. Putting yourself down and saying: "Oh, I'm so stupid", that also creates distance from yourself. You berate yourself for it, you criticize yourself for it, but in doing so, you create a certain distance to yourself. If you are quiet instead and let yourself be like that, then you see how you really are, in all its clarity. This is uncomfortable, because we like to think we're pretty cool. And then, you slowly get to know yourself, which is simply a matter of practice.

[Sandra:] This could even fit in with the fact that I ask myself the same question over and over again, as if in a rhythm, in a recurring rhythm. For a while, I am always happy with my partners, and after a certain time, then no longer. Then I think: "This is the wrong man for me. It's the wrong man, I don't want him like this." It's always the same.

[Dhyan Mikael] Yes, it's like that. We have this idea that the right man exists and, although we are not aware of what lies behind it, we also have a vague idea somewhere of what it would be like if he were the right one. The problem is that there is no such person. We think that if he's the right one, then I'll be happy with him. But then you get to know him, and the first four weeks are great and the next three months are great.

And then you slowly get to know him as he really is, namely: he's a completely normal person, a man like any other. And then you realize: "Well, he doesn't make me happy either." But we don't want to admit that to ourselves. And you'll feel the same way with every man. There's no man with whom this won't happen to you. He simply doesn't exist, the man we long for. We long for something that exists, but not in a man.

[Sandra:] In us.

[Dhyan Mikael:] In us, of course.

[Sandra:] Yes, through this acceptance, as you just said, even with this cyclical behavior in me, I could say, "Okay, aha, there it is again," and as long as it's there now... well, it takes a few days for it to subside again... But that's also a behavior that simply belongs to Sandra.

[Dhyan Mikael:] You know, we never learnt to rest in ourselves and to love ourselves and be close to ourselves. When you were a little kid, you were constantly told, not just every day, but probably every five minutes, that you were somehow wrong; lovingly, of course, constructively, just like partners do with each other today when they are adults. We don't know how to be close to ourselves because we think we are bad. We look for happiness out there, but it's not there, not for anyone.

Nobody, not even the happy couples, aren't happy because the other person is so great. They are so happy because they have worked something out with themselves and have found themselves. And if we don't like ourselves and aren't close to ourselves, then we can't look there, and then we just look for it out there. That's what the whole world does, everyone. And everyone is lying. Nobody looks closely. No one is happy, all the relationships are going down the drain, everyone has problems, but everyone pretends it's actually there.

Everyone thinks: "Okay, if only I would be okay...", that's what I used to think... "If I was finally capable of properly relating, then I'd be happy with a woman." The women thought the other way round: "If only I had the right man, then I'd be happy with him." Everyone is like that, everyone. And no one... you know, it's like the emperor's new clothes. Everyone sees that the emperor is naked, but no one says anything. And no one finds happiness in another person, not one, but no one says anything.

Everyone believes in this dream, because if you stop it, there's only one way: the way to yourself, and you to walk that path, you have to learn this first. It's actually quite simple, you just have to figure it out. And if you learn to accept yourself as you are, yes, as weird as you are, as a, yes, as a bitch in a relationship or something like that... if you learn to love yourself with it, then you'll... I'm telling you, you'll realize something quite amazing: the more you love yourself as you are, as weird as you are, the more beautiful your partner will be.

I promise you. Do that for a while. And then, it won't matter which partner you have; they will simply become more beautiful. Watch out. There's something to discover. I can't wait to hear what you have to say in six months' time.

[Sandra:] Yes, I know that a bit from the beginning, because I didn't do that with him then, and I thought he was very beautiful then, too. But I think, yes, I want that, yes, that's definitely one way.

[Dhyan Mikael:] We don't have any conscious expectations of each other at the beginning of a relationship. The other is just the unknown entity. Unknown, we don't know anything about it, and that's why we don't have any expectations and we simply marvel. And then, we get to know him more and more - or so we think.

Of course, we don't know him at all, but we slowly form a picture of him. And as this happens, our expectations are coming in, and then he becomes ugly. He is just as beautiful as before, but we look at him differently. And then, the expectations come in, and then, yes, it just turns to shit. It's the same for everyone, not just for you.

[Sandra:] Thank you, Mikael.

[Dhyan Mikael:] Thank you for asking. Thank you very much, Sandra.

Nobody does anything for anyone else

Link to topic in video at 25m19s

[Simone:] So, Mikael, I have a few things to read out now. Margret just wanted to thank you: "Dear Mikael, I would like to take this opportunity to thank you very, very much for your love and kindness and for your tireless efforts for us humans. Thank you."

[Dhyan Mikael:] You know, my Guru Swamiji said something the other day. He said, "No one does anything for anyone else."

Everything people do is only for themselves, even the Guru. Jesus also did everything he did just for himself, except that the people around him didn't understand that. And that also applies to me. I don't do anything for anyone else. I simply do what I enjoy doing the most. I'm basically doing myself a favor by doing that, because nothing gives me more pleasure than that. And that's true everywhere in life. If we learn to do what makes us feel good and what brings us joy, then we give everyone else a gift. That's how life really works.

And I keep hearing that I love and radiate something, but I don't do it consciously. I learned from my Master to love myself, more and more, more and more, even though everything in me thought that this was the wrong direction and that I should rather love everyone else. I have learned to love myself more and more. And what then happens is that the other people only feel this love. That was the secret of Jesus. He didn't sacrifice himself, on the contrary. He only ever looked more inward, only ever loved more, and found God in himself.

And that's what I learned, and then, from the outside, it looks like you love other people, but in reality, it's not like that at all. And in this way, we can all live together in an incredibly beautiful way if everyone learns that a little: to love oneself, to accept oneself, to turn inwards, to meditate and to find this love and this happiness within oneself. A person like that just radiates beauty, and then we have a wonderful time together. But thank you anyway. I still appreciate your compliment. Thank you very much.

Is self-love an ego trip?

Link to topic in video at 28m14s

[Simone:] Then I'll read out Tom's question, Mikael. "Dear Mikael, thank you for your video 'Just like this you should be'. If I'm allowed to be the way I am, then I'm afraid of going on an ego trip. How can I avoid this? Thank you very much and best regards, Tom."

[Dhyan Mikael:] This is such a nice question. Thank you, Tom.

That's really the challenge on this journey: we think that loving ourselves is an ego trip, and criticizing ourselves and loving others feels right. But it's not true. Criticizing yourself is the ego trip, this negative ego. Give it a try. Start loving yourself for once. Try that for once. Start getting to know yourself.

Start feeling yourself and getting to know who you really are. You will be amazed. No ego can withstand what you are getting to know: this sensitive being that is not at all as cool as the ego would like to be, much more limited than you would like to be, much more incapable than you would like to be.

You make so many mistakes that you don't want to make. You are so human and yet you want to be perfect. Loving yourself doesn't mean thinking you're great. The ego does that. Loving yourself means loving yourself as you are. When you start to love yourself, then you can't help but start to see yourself as you really are, and that destroys the ego.

But people who have not tried this for themselves believe what you have just formulated so beautifully. That is what is usually said. It's not my experience that it's true, quite the opposite. So, just get started. And by the way: even if you get on an ego trip, I mean, you never know... You know, on this path, you can never be sure where you are. You never know if you're on an ego trip or if you're just losing your ego. How would you know that? You only have your own perception.

But if you sincerely want to get to know yourself as you are, then these problems will all solve themselves. I promise you that. And meditation helps tremendously. Meditation really helps you not to go on an ego trip. Meditation alone in the morning and once a week in the group, if possible on site or, if that's not possible, online. This helps to break down the ego really nicely. That's my experience. So, to summarize: I know your concern, a lot of people believe that, but in reality, it's the other way around. Thank you.

The role of the subconscious

Link to topic in video at 32m33s

[Simone:] Mikael, there are three more questions from the chat, which I will now read out one after the other.

[Dhyan Mikael:] Yes, please. Thank you.

[Simone:] And this is from Minette: "Mikael, what role does the human subconscious play?"

[Dhyan Mikael:] Wow, what a question. Thank you.

What we consciously perceive is such a tiny little part of our being, usually, before you start meditating. But in essence, one could say: the subconscious plays the main role, and what we consciously perceive doesn't play a big role at all. But I like to take a practical approach to things. And from a practical point of view, everything that is important to me somehow comes to the surface. How? I don't need to worry about that.

That's what life does. The unconscious things that are supposed to come to consciousness, they do. You get enough triggers; you get enough opportunities for them. And they only come when the time is right. I don't think it's a good idea to rummage around in your subconscious along the lines of: "There must be something there. I want to improve." That's not necessary. You sense that there is an infinite amount inside you that you have no idea about.

And we don't need to know anything about it either. But when we become still, when we start to meditate, when we learn to stop focusing our attention on thoughts... In Samarpan Meditation, you do this by resting your attention for half an hour every morning up here in the crown chakra, at the top of your head... If you leave your attention there, you can't think at all.

Then you think again during the meditation, you realize: "Oops, I'm thinking again", and then you return there, for half an hour, again and again. And then it actually seems as if you no longer know anything, if you no longer pay attention to your thoughts; if you no longer pay attention to everything you think is right and wrong. If you forget everything you know, then you enter a space where you no longer know anything.

It's not that you then recognize the subconscious. It's more like this: you keep letting go of what you think you know consciously, as best you can, and then you float on what is actually in charge here. It is as if the subconscious is a huge, powerful river that carries us, but we cannot see the water that carries us because it is transparent. But it carries us.

Someone once said: "Not knowing is the most intimate." This is how we are closest to each other: when we know nothing. Incidentally, this also applies to partnerships.

And in a way, I experience it in such a way that the unconscious remains unconscious. It's not that I know more and more, but more and more happens by itself, through me, without me knowing. Then I realize: "Wow, there's someone at work here who knows, but it's not me." It's not that the unconscious becomes more and more conscious. I experience it like this: you say goodbye more and more to all the things that you previously thought were important... what you know, what you want, your own goals, your own dreams.

And you learn more and more to trust what you don't know and can't know. And the more you learn that, the more you get to know yourself, the easier life becomes, the more trouble-free life becomes. It's just magical. So, now I've talked a lot about this, but I hope it helps you a bit with your question. Thank you very much.

[Simone:] I already have a response to that, Mikael. "Thank you for the answer (the submarine emerges)."

[Dhyan Mikael:] Yes, really, the submarine emerges slowly, very gradually and by itself. Thank you.

Words without an owner?

Link to topic in video at 38m38s

[Simone:] Then I'll read out the next question, from Jeanette Nicole.

[Dhyan Mikael:] Hello Jeanette Nicole. Nice to have you here.

[Simone:] "Hello, Mikael. Is it that words are spoken without an owner of the words?"

[Dhyan Mikael:] Sometimes I speak words and I don't know where they come from, and I am amazed. When I make a video or a Satsang, it's often like that.

Sometimes I speak words and I don't know where they come from, but they are just totally stupid. Then I have the feeling that they come from my conditioning, from me, from my thoughts.

I rarely say things carefully. Either it flows from somewhere that has nothing to do with me, or it flows from somewhere that has a lot to do with me, but I still don't really have any control over what I say. Maybe you know that, maybe you know what I mean.

And you can feel it. Sometimes you speak and it feels easy. You don't even know... it feels right. Not because you're right, but it just feels right. And sometimes, you speak and your stomach hurts, even though what you're saying sounds really great.

Words aren't actually necessary. The actual communication, even here, even in Satsang, has nothing to do with words. When we communicate with someone, it always happens via energy, via our aura, via closeness, and the words... I sometimes have the feeling that we simply engage with each other by talking to each other so that we have something to do together.

You talk to each other, or you dance together, or you cuddle together, or you do the dishes together, but the actual togetherness has nothing to do with the words, even here in Satsang, because what I say is not the essential thing. You just sense something from me, and there is something that inspires you. And that what you perceive in yourself is the actual communication.

But we talk because we are human, and because we don't know anything else. Swamiji told us what it was like with his Gurus. He was in the Himalayas and was sometimes together with a Guru for half a year or a year. And he once said the other day: the Guru did not speak to him. The communication was without words, but very clear. All the insights, all the guru's knowledge was transmitted. He began to feel it within himself, but not by receiving lessons, but simply by being close to this Guru.

And it is the same with us humans. I don't know what I'm telling you, because it happens on a level that has nothing to do with the words I'm saying right now. But if I didn't say anything, there wouldn't be anyone here. So, you talk and you listen and you ask questions and I say something, and that way we have an excuse to spend time together, and something is transmitted, something that has already become normal for me but perhaps not quite normal for you yet, and you feel that inside you.

And suddenly you have an understanding within you, but it doesn't really have anything to do with what I'm saying. That's why I wouldn't take the words... they're not that important. There are also incredibly wise people, there are also Gurus, who only speak garbage, they really only speak garbage. But what people receive when they are close to these people is incredibly beautiful.

There are Gurus who are really harsh and mean, on the outside, but the energy speaks a completely different language. And that's why people come to them: because they simply become blissfully happy around these people who, if you listened to their words, wouldn't say anything special. So, it's really very mysterious, the whole thing.

But, as I said, if I didn't say anything, we would just sit here in silence. Most people aren't ready for that yet, but actually it would be enough.

Thank you for your question.

Sometimes I think I can't take any more

Link to topic in video at 44m33s

during the day? [Simone:] Mikael, there's another question from Amala.

[Dhyan Mikael:] Hello, Amala.

[Simone:] "Hello, Mikael. You once said that you quit your job back then because otherwise you would have gone to the dogs. I've been back at my job for two days now and I'm already ready for the weekend again. Sometimes I think I just can't do it anymore. Love, Amala."

[Dhyan Mikael:] Yes, I was thinking about you today.

It was like that for me back then as well... I'm a pretty stubborn person, and once I do something, I do it pretty straightforward and pretty long. I'm not really used to experiencing long periods of doubt. For me it's more like this: at some point I realize... So, I do something for so long, on and on and on, even though it doesn't really fit anymore, that's more my way of doing things, and then, at some point, I get to the point where I realize: this doesn't work at all.

And then, all of a sudden, it's totally clear. Other people are a bit different, maybe you're one of them. My advice would be: don't think about it; one could say... I would, and I do the same with myself, by the way: I refuse to think about whether I want something or not. I refuse to think about whether what I'm doing now is the right thing or not, because I can't answer the question.

Just get on with it. Just carry on as best you can. And I really mean that: not just "as best you can" in the sense of as best you can for yourself, in the sense that you should pull yourself together, that's not what I mean, but: do the job as good as you can. Do your best for yourself, but also for the job, and refuse to think about this question, but feel your feelings, and it will become clear to you. When the time comes that you no longer want to or can no longer do this job, you will know it.

You will recognize it when the question disappears. That's how it was for me back then. For me, the decision was so impossible, because I was a soldier at the time, I was an officer. I was in the army; I was an officer. I had signed up for a very long time back then. I would have had to do this job for many, many more years, and there's no official way out of it. You can't get out of it once you've signed up. And at some point, after a few years, I realized: I have to get out of here, I can no longer do this job.

And for me, the decision was so difficult and so impossible. I also thought that there was no way out anyway, so I didn't even have to think about it. I thought it wasn't possible. And nevertheless, at some point I realized: I have to get out of here. And you know, then it was no longer a question. It wasn't a question: should I still do this or not? No, it was clear: I have to get out of here. I knew I couldn't get out of there. And yet it was clear: I have to get out of here.

And then I found a way, one that didn't even exist, but I found a way. And this point comes by itself. You don't need to worry about it. You don't have to write down what you like about the job and what you don't like in order to make a kind of conscious overview. No. Live your life as it is. Don't change anything. Do everything as good as you can. and the clarity will come one day. Either you learn to love the job or one day the question disappears, and you realize: that's it, bye.

As long as we have the question, we are not done. Then you just have to get on with it; just get on with it.

And what I also know is that sometimes you go through phases. For example, I had that again at the weekend. I had two days on Saturday and Sunday where I felt really strange. That's not often the case for me, but I tend to have self-doubts or think that I haven't done something well or haven't done something right. And then I realized: "Ah, it was New Moon." And I know that... It tends to happen during certain phases of the moon cycle.

And I know that you've just experienced a lot in your life. When you experience things that are very challenging for you and take a lot out of you, it's really hard to go back to work now and feel good about it. You are completely preoccupied with yourself. You really don't need an eight-hour job to make you happy. You are completely busy, but you still have to go to work. Therefore, in your specific situation, I would say: give yourself time and don't think about these things right now.

If you don't want to be there anymore, then you'll know, and you'll recognize it by the fact that you don't have to ask anyone anymore. You just know it. Until then, just stay where you are, and you'll have a much easier time.

I am with you. Thank you for asking.

[Simone:] Mikael, I'd like to read out another thank you from Tom, who referred to the video 'Just like this you should be'. "Thank you, Mikael. I now clearly see self-love and meditation as the key for me. Thank you, thank you, thank you."

[Dhyan Mikael:] It's really the only thing we need to know, everything else happens on its own. It's unbelievable.

Reaching people without concepts

Link to topic in video at 52m40s

[Simone:] Then there's another question in the chat, Mikael, which I'll read out now. It's from Nana Sabia.

[Dhyan Mikael:] Hello Nana Sabia, hello to you.

[Simone:] And she writes: "Hello Mikael, I'm in a dilemma. I would like to accompany people, but I have big problems with mental concepts and theories, precisely because I am very connected and have always had a deep inner knowledge. Unfortunately, I have the thought that if I accompany others, I must also use these concepts because they expect it or otherwise won't take me seriously. I would prefer to be in Being when I am with people, but many cannot do this. Where is the middle ground? The more I am in being, the less I want and can pass on mental concepts."

[Dhyan Mikael:] Oh, thank you.

Yes, of course I understand you very, very well.

When I had the intuition three years ago, three and a half years ago: "Mikael, you're going to make videos", I thought I was crazy. I thought: what am I supposed to say? I don't know anything. I don't have a concept either, I don't have a clear, easy-to-communicate concept that you could sell well and that you could present convincingly and where people would say: "Oh yes, that's true and that has substance." I don't have these things at all.

But that what is so close to your heart, the Being, that carries over; but not because I'm so great, it just carries over. That's what happens.

You don't need any concepts. The important thing is to be true to yourself. There are people who work well and enjoy working with concepts, and they are joined by people who need concepts so that they can learn something. That works wonderfully. And then there are people who don't need concepts to be able to absorb something, and they come to people like you or maybe to me.

And you can do it like this: don't force life to do anything. Just play with it. You do your work, you earn your living, and you know: you actually want to do something else. Just try it out, the way you want it. You know, the important thing is that you don't go by what you think people expect – then you're not interesting – but that you offer something that has to do with you as you really are, even if you think: no one wants that.

I thought: if I make a video, if I give Satsang... who cares about that? I knew I had nothing to say, and yet it really seems to be a blessing for people. I don't understand it, but that's just because I'm authentic in how I am. And that will happen with you too. How? We don't know. So just play with it. Just try it out, somehow, but be true to yourself.

And create space for yourself so that you can be true to yourself, and by space I mean: set up your life like this... that's what I said at the beginning: don't try to force life to do anything, that you have to be successful with it, for example. Just do your job, continue to live your life practically as before, and just get on with it, somehow. And then you'll see where it takes you. Look, I do the same thing. I earn my money with computer work. I program websites, and I really like doing that. I have fun with it. And if I have to, I can keep doing it until I die.

I can do it, and I like doing it. But I would prefer to only give Satsang and only make videos, simply because it's such a joy. But how that happens is not up to me. From the very beginning, from day one, I just left it up to life and said: "Okay, life, if you want me to really make these videos, then you have to show me somehow." And the more people listen or watch, and the more people support me... I'm always asking for contributions, memberships and donations. The more people do it, the more time I can devote to it, because then I don't have to work, because I have to make a living.

And so, I just leave it to life. Then I say: "Hey life, if you want me to make videos as authentically idiotic as I am, then you have to support me somehow and then I'll do it. And if that doesn't happen, then I'll just make websites or some other work." And then it becomes easy. Then you just say: "Okay, life, that's not my business, that's not my decision. You decide." And then it becomes easy, then you don't have any expectation that anything has to happen or that you have to be successful.

And, you know, we don't know what life has in store for us. There are people who start talking about the Truth or about Being, like I do, and touch other people. I know people who don't say a word about these things, they do other things, but they touch people deeply in an incredible way. Some people do bodywork, some people do art, each in the way they are, each in the way that comes out of them naturally.

It's a bit tempting when you start to feel this Truth within yourself to believe that there must be a very specific way in which you can now pass it on to others. But it has to happen somehow by itself. Somehow it happens by itself, and differently for each person. I thought I would never talk about such things in my life, never. I could never have imagined it, and when I had the idea three and a half years ago, I was shocked.

But now I've been avoiding it for three years, and now I'm doing it after all. Be patient, take your time. Continue to live your life as before. Let what you feel inside you mature. Let this being mature, and let this being, as far as practical matters are concerned, pave its own way. Don't think about it, don't make any plans. And it will happen, I promise you; but you don't know when.

Yes.

Thank you for your question. And be patient with yourself. Thank you.

Support me if it gives you joy

Link to topic in video at 1h01m53s

I would like to say at this point... I always forget this. People tell me from time to time: "You never say that you need something." I would like to take this opportunity to say: everything I do is free for everyone. Anyone can watch all my videos. Every Satsang is free. And I think it's important that it is like this, because what I spread here is not mine. I don't know where it comes from.

But for very practical reasons, as I have just described, it is very, very helpful for me if there are people who support me financially, because then I have the time for it. Then I can spend more time on Satsangs and videos, because that takes time, it takes money, and it takes a lot of energy. And if you are happy to support me with this, you are very, very welcome to do so. I'm happy about every single person who does that, and on my website, there's a page called 'Membership', and that's where I've put together the information on how it works.

But, as I said, I appreciate support, in a sense I need it too, otherwise I don't have the time to do it to the extent that I do, but it's all free and you can feel free to watch my videos at any time. You are free to watch my videos and join in the Satsang or write to me or ask questions at any time, whether you support me or not. It's not about paying, just about supporting me, simply out of joy and gratitude. Yes, so much about that.

And I thank all the people – I forget to say that, in Satsang at least –, who already support me. I am so touched. Sometimes I get an email when someone has started to support me, and I'm so touched and stunned every time. It's like a sign from God for me, who then says to me: "Yes, keep going." Thank you to every single person who has already supported me. Thank you so much. So, Simone, do you have anything else?

[Simone:] Yes, I have a heartfelt thank you from Nana Sabia. She writes: "I am so touched by you addressing me directly. I feel seen and connected. Thank you so much, Mikael."

[Dhyan Mikael:] Yes, but that really is the case. The question just now was about the words. I've forgotten everything I said to you. I've forgotten the subject. I can't remember anything. It's really as if the words had nothing to do with me. But I feel you, as if we were one. And that is the gift of being human.

Thank you for being there.

Looking at the "I"

Link to topic in video at 1h05m21s

[Simone:] Then there's another question in the chat, with the acronym B.O.: "Is it good to look at your sense of 'I' in order to recognize whether it has an end or a beginning somewhere, whether it has any substance?"

Thank you.

So, it's like looking at thoughts and trying to figure out if they have substance or not. Thoughts have no substance, but they are endless. The I-feeling has no substance, but it is endless.

It is not my way. My path is not to turn to this in order to realize that it is actually nothing.

There are various spiritual paths and directions where you do this in this way, and I have never trusted them because I don't trust myself. There is nothing wrong with these paths. There may be people for whom such paths are useful. But I have always known that I'm not suitable for it. I simply can't judge: is it the 'me' who is looking at itself, and also feels spiritual at the same time, or who is looking? Do you know what I mean? It's all too vague for me, because I can't trust myself.

I like things to be simple and practical, and that's why I like Samarpan Meditation so much. I rest my attention up here (in the crown chakra). When I'm up there, just in this part of my body, nothing spiritual... You don't need to imagine a chakra or anything there... just try to be there with your attention up here, in this place that you can touch – and you can't think. Of course, you think anyway, but then you are no longer there. Then, suddenly, your attention is in your thoughts.

And then I go back there again. And for me, it's such a simple, practical matter that I can't fool myself, I can't do anything wrong. You can't do this meditation wrong.

And I am capable of this. And my experience is that in a very magical way, which at the beginning you can't even comprehend how it can work at all, it connects you with what is beyond 'me', beyond thoughts, beyond this body, without imagining anything, without seeking anything, without wanting to achieve anything, simply through this very simple, mundane, seemingly harmless exercise. And these spiritual games with 'looking at the ego' and things like that, as I said, I think I'd probably have fun with that for a day or two, and then I'd be fooling myself without realizing it.

And that's why I don't do that kind of thing. I stay away from it. But that doesn't mean it's not good per se. I can only speak from my own experience. I really like it foolproof because I'm a fool. I really need it simple, and that's why I talk about Samarpan Meditation so often, because is really suitable for us normal people. That's the great thing about it, that's the fantastic thing about it. Suddenly, anyone can be spiritual, even if they are completely normal, even someone like me, for example.

Thank you for your question. I love questions like that. Thank you.

[Simone:] I don't have any new questions at the moment, Mikael.

[Dhyan Mikael:] Yes, thank you Simone. Then I'll read out an email question.

Who is in charge of your attention?

Link to topic in video at 1h10m49s

"I have been meditating in silence for years. I am an emotional person, and I feel this very much through my body. But at the same time, my thinking mind is also very strong. When emotions arise in me, I sometimes struggle to let them be. In other words, I'm sitting in the middle of this pot of emotions and find it very difficult to distance myself. I saw a video of yours and immediately joined in (I assume she's referring to the meditation). The first thing I felt was: 'Wow, that is it.

Now I have something where I feel at home when these emotions pull me in.' During the Samarpan Meditation, I felt a tingling sensation in the crown chakra area and on the spine in my neck right from the start, and my head felt hot. For a few days now, I have been getting severe headaches and also strong pressure in my sinuses when meditating on the crown chakra. The noise in my head is always audible. Now my question. Did you also experience physical pain at first? And is it normal for the body and head to make themselves known with pain like this, or am I perhaps too fixated?"

Thank you for this question, for this email. And I would like to say two things about it. One is, you say that you now have a place where you can be when your emotions are boiling. And that's exactly how I feel, that's what I appreciate so much about it. It's as if I've suddenly found a safe place within myself where I can return to at any time. I don't always manage to stay there.

As I said, when I meditate, I go up here with my attention and then I stay there, but suddenly I realize that I'm back in my thoughts. So, I don't manage to stay there, but I can return to it again and again, like a refuge, a safe haven. And once you've experienced that for a while, it's just incredible, and it just becomes more and more. This escape point becomes an escape room, and it gets bigger and bigger, and life gets easier and easier.

And you ask about your physical feelings and sensations that you get when you meditate. It is like this: when we meditate the Samarpan Meditation, when we direct our attention to the crown chakra, what basically happens is that we direct our attention, often for the first time ever in this life, away from the body, from the body and its perception, from the body and the thoughts.

And what then usually happens is that after a relatively short time, the body starts to resist. It doesn't like this at all. The body wants to bind our attention to itself, which you then notice. And it's normal. When you start to meditate... after a short time, once the first easy phase is over, the body starts doing all sorts of things. It's a bit different for everyone. And it's just a very simple game: a battle for attention.

You can simply ignore it: then your head just gets hot. Sometimes you suddenly get a terrible itch somewhere, or something hurts and pinches, and your body says: "I don't want to go on, I can't go on, I have to get up." That's normal.

Don't think about it, don't worry about it. Just keep coming back up here with your attention, back here, quietly.

You don't need to fight your body. Just let it be. And if you ignore it and just gently come back to the crown chakra again and again while you are meditating in this half hour, then the body will get used to the fact that you are in charge of your attention. Once the body has experienced this for a few weeks, these symptoms slowly subside.

When the body then slowly calms down, the emotions usually start, important emotions that really want your attention, and then the thoughts. These are the three levels that pull at your attention. But for this half hour in the morning, we let it all go, and we keep coming back here with the attention. And the longer you do this, the easier it becomes.

Thank you. I love these practical questions about meditation. Thank you very much. Simone, should I keep going or do you have something?

Meditate more often during the day?

Link to topic in video at 1h17m13s

[Simone:] A question just came in. Amala asks again.

[Dhyan Mikael:] Oh yes, how nice. Hello Amala.

[Simone:] "Do you also meditate during the day or just half an hour in the morning? I have the feeling that half an hour is not enough for me. Thank you so much for my previous question."

[Dhyan Mikael:] I love you. I meditate for the half hour in the morning, every morning, no matter how I feel, always first thing right after I wake up. I go to the bathroom because I'm going to the toilet, and after that... I always prepare my meditation place in the evening, then I can just go straight there, sit down and meditate. I do that every morning. And then, once a week, I meditate for another half hour in the late afternoon or early evening together with other people, usually online.

And I often meditate during the day, but in a different way, not formally. I sink into myself when I'm working. I get quiet when I answer letters, when I go for a walk, when I cook. Earlier, at the dinner table: the children and my partner were talking, and I sat there and listened, and that was meditation. But it's not like I'm sitting there meditating, I'm doing something.

But if I had the feeling, and there have been times... if I had the feeling: "This is not enough for me, I need more meditation", oh, then I would do that. If I felt like, "Oh, my day is so full, I have to work, I have to do this, I have to take care of this and that, but what I really need right now is: I need to meditate again," then I would do that. Yes, just do it.

My experience with meditation is that the time I spend there saves an incredible amount of time. People often think they lose time, but that's not true. The time you spend there makes everything else so much easier and makes me more centered, makes me stronger, so that everything is easier. And I keep realizing that it actually saves me time. And of course, I feel much better.

And what really helps is meditating in a group, once a week. And if you can't do this at home in your city, do it online. This has an incredible effect, especially if you are going through times when you are experiencing very big challenges and where you easily feel lost, I can tell you.

There are online opportunities every day to meditate in a group or, for example with the people here in Germany from ODM every Saturday. You sit down, that half hour, and it's like you're with so many kind, like-minded, loving people, it's such a support, especially when you're having times that are really hard for you. I can only recommend it.

Thank you, Amala. It is so good to have you here.

[Simone:] Mikael, I have another question in the chat, I'll read it out now. It's ten minutes to half past nine.

[Dhyan Mikael:] So late already... that's mean.

Perceive and express limits better

Link to topic in video at 1h21m48s

[Simone:] Narashima asks: "How can I learn to better perceive and express my boundaries?"

[Dhyan Mikael:] You learn to better perceive your boundaries by repeatedly experiencing what it's like when you go beyond your boundaries. That is the only way. There is no smart way. We want to avoid learning, but we learn by making mistakes, and you don't need to be afraid of making mistakes.

You are just the way you are, you can't be any different, and then it happens to you again and again that you are not mindful of yourself; that you do things that are not good for you; that you put yourself in situations that are not good for you, or that you stay in them even though they are no longer good for you. And then you experience it. You experience it and you feel it. And we already mentioned it at the beginning of this Online Satsang: then it's about... Sonja's question was about this... then it's about experiencing it, but not judging it.

Then to not say: "Oh, crap, now I've messed it up again", but to simply feel very quietly: "Ah! How does it feel when I do it like this, when I experience it like this, when I am like this?" And through this feeling, maturing happens within us, a learning, and not up there. You then behave differently out of your own accord at some point, without realizing it. This is how true change happens.

Just dare to keep doing what you feel like doing, even if you know that you might get into trouble. Just follow your attraction, follow what brings you joy. Take the risk of getting into trouble. And then you keep experiencing these things where you realize: "Yes, I could have done that differently now." But you couldn't have; but then you feel the pain or the discomfort or the disappointment, whatever. I have that all the time in my life too, and I still have that.

Sometimes I want to do something, and I know exactly: it's not good for me. I know it for sure. But I feel the attraction. Sometimes it's something as mundane as eating something that isn't good for me. But I feel the desire for it and the appetite, and then I do it, and then I feel uncomfortable afterwards, and then I feel it without judging myself. And as a result, these things very slowly lose their power over us, very, very gradually. And that's how we learn. We learn everything that way, including what you call 'setting boundaries'.

That's the method that works best. Everything else doesn't really work. And the great thing is that when you learn this, it goes hand in hand with an increase in your inner strength. It's almost as if you no longer need to set boundaries because they are clearly defined. You no longer need to say anything at all. So, it's not about learning to express something better or communicate more clearly.

None of that is really useful. If you learn to feel these things that are happening, then expressing them better will happen by itself, if it really is up. Most of the time, completely different things happen so that it is no longer necessary. Then, people realize on their own that they no longer need to mess with you. That's my experience.

And be patient with yourself. This kind of learning is very easy, very natural. It's the natural way we humans learn; it just takes a bit of time. And don't judge yourself. Be how you are and feel what it's like to be you. Then, learning will happen all by itself. You don't need to be particularly clever. It all happens by itself. It worked for me too.

Thank you, thank you, thank you. I think we have to stop. We have three minutes left, but I don't want to keep Devasetu up for too long. I just want to say thank you, first of all for these wonderful, wonderful questions. I'm so grateful to be with you and with you guys. And I would also like to point out that we... it's been ages since the last Online Satsang, almost five weeks, I think. Five weeks - that's far too long.

I found it really awful to wait that long. But I will now be doing two Satsangs over Easter, and I would like to invite you to join me: on Sunday, March 31, which is Easter Sunday, and on Easter Monday, April 1. On these two days, I will be doing an Easter Intensive, there will be Online Satsang on both days in the afternoon from 2pm to 4pm, and you are cordially invited to join in. I look forward to seeing you.

I look forward to seeing you. And the special thing about these two Satsangs, as with the last intensive on New Year's Day, is that we will also meditate together on both days. So, there's Online Satsang from 2 pm to 3:30 pm, and then, from 3:30 pm to 4 pm, you can meditate with me and everyone else if you want to. And that's just so nice. Meditating together is simply amazing. I would be very happy if you were there as well.

Thank you very much. Thank you very much. Thank you, Simone, for your questions, for reading them out. Thank you, Devasetu, that we can do this here.

Thank you for being here.

I love you.

Good evening. Bye.