Online Satsang of September 19, 2024

[Dhyan Mikael:] Yes, let's get started.

Welcome to Satsang.

I am happy that you are here.

For those of you who are here for the first time today, I would like to say a sentence or two, as always, about what we are doing here in the first place. Basically, I am talking here in Satsang about what I have learned in my life, namely that this life does not have to be difficult; that this life does not have to be characterized by fear and suffering, but that this life is actually possible in a completely different way.

And how this works in practice for normal people, like you or someone like me, is something I love to talk about, because I have been able to learn this over the last few decades, and I am simply incredibly happy to pass it on. And if you have any questions about your life, about your spiritual path, then you are welcome to ask me a question here in Satsang, either in writing in the chat – Simone will then see it and read it out and I will then answer – but you can also talk to me directly via Zoom and ask your question there if you wish.

And if there are no questions here online, then I also have some e-mail questions that I can read out and answer. Yes, and we're going to do that for an hour and a half and I'm really looking forward to it. I love this opportunity to be with you and share that. Yes, that's actually all there is to it. Simone, do you have something to read, or can I start?

[Simone:] No, Mikael, I already have something to read.

[Speaker-o:] Ah, how nice, that makes me very happy.

Grief is the medicine

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[Simone:] Yes. I am reading it out now. The question comes from Hiranyakashipu. I hope I pronounced it correctly.

[Dhyan Mikael:] Hello!

[Simone:] "Hi Mikael. Can you say something about the grieving processes and loss? What can help with this and what is your experience? Best regards. Thank you."

[Dhyan Mikael:] Grief process and loss, yes... What you call grieving process is a wonderful thing. When we lose something in life, a part of us... We lose a part of ourselves, and then it has to be repaired within us – and that is grief. For example, if you have lived with a person for a long time, then this cohabitation has become a part of you, and when that stops, for whatever reason, then something of you dies. And with that comes intense feelings and you wonder what you can do.

What you call grieving process is something quite wonderful. When we lose something in life, we lose a part of ourselves, and then it has to be repaired within us – and that is grief.

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What needs to happen happens by itself: the grief. That's the medicine – this grieving process, the pain, the anger or the despair or the loneliness or the tears or the fear. That is the medicine. So, you don't have to do anything yourself – you just have to take the medicine, and practically that means: accept yourself as you are.

Feel the feelings that are here. Take your time – there is no rush. It's not that the grieving process is the problem, or these feelings that are coming up now, but that's the help. And if you accept it by allowing the feelings, willingly, as best you can, then you promote this new becoming whole within you.

What needs to happen happens by itself: the grief. That is the medicine – this grieving process, the pain, the anger or the despair. So, you don't have to do anything yourself – just take the medicine, and practically that means: accept yourself as you are. Feel your feelings. Take your time – there is no rush.

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Then this dying in you can come to a good conclusion, and then you will be reborn. Then something new will emerge in you.

It is not that the grieving process is the problem, or these feelings, but that is the help. And when you accept it, by allowing the feelings, willingly, you encourage this becoming new within you. Then this dying in you can come to a good conclusion, and then you will be reborn.

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We have a tendency not to have our attention, our center, in ourselves, but we have a tendency to have it elsewhere, especially with our partner, for example. You live in a relationship, and your attention is with your partner and what he or she does; whether he or she loves you; whether he or she gives you attention.

We have our attention on what this person is thinking, how they are doing, what they want... And when that person is gone, it's as if our center has disappeared. There's nothing left where we had our center of life, it's gone, and that really hurts. And the feelings are now helping you to come back to yourself. The feelings help you to come back to your own center – where you actually belong.

We have a tendency not to have our attention, our center, in ourselves, but with our partner. And when they're gone, it's as if our center has disappeared, and that really hurts. And the feelings now help you to get back to your own center – where you actually belong.

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And if these feelings have brought you back here, then you can just stay here. Then you can learn to always live from your center in other areas of your life, in other relationships or in a new partnership or in a new friendship or whatever it's about: to have your attention in you while you are loving, while you are living with someone, and not out there.

And that is what you learn in this really, really healing grieving process. There is nothing wrong with it at all. And I would encourage you to give yourself time to do that. Don't be in a hurry. Something like this takes time – not a few days, not a few weeks, but many months if it was a long and intense relationship.

Yes.

I am with you. And you are asking about my experience.

My personal experience is: the more I used to... I forgot to mute my cell phone, I have to do that now, otherwise it irritates me. Sorry.

My experience is this. In my life, it was like this: I used to always have my attention on my partner or my friends out there. I didn't even know where I was. And then I was really in trouble when that came to an end. But over the last twenty-five years, I've learned to live more and more within myself and to have my attention with me; to have my center within me and no longer with other people.

And now, now it is like this: when something happens that upsets me or a loss occurs, the feelings are still there – of course it's sad; of course it hurts – but it's no longer so devastating. It is no longer so existential because my foundation is not affected. I then have feelings, intense feelings, but it doesn't shake me to my foundations. You can live well from here. That's a safe ground inside you. That is my experience.

And I want to tell you something else, which is my experience, because many people can't even imagine what that means: "staying with yourself". Most people have the belief that this is what makes a relationship: that I am completely with you with my attention, and you are completely with me. Most people believe that if you don't do that, if I stay with myself with my attention, and you with yourself with your attention, that you won't have a relationship at all, but that's not true.

On the contrary: once you practice and try it out, you will experience a completely new kind of relationship, and you will ask yourself how you were able to live like this before. You will realize that you couldn't have any relationship at all before, because only a person who is at peace within themselves can enter into a relationship with someone else. What I used to do – I was always completely lost in my partner... that wasn't a relationship. It was as if I wasn't there at all.

So, there's no contradiction at all, although most people who haven't experienced it themselves in the way I'm describing right now assume that, but that's not true. Perhaps this will inspire you a little as to how you can deal with your grief and the phase of life you are currently experiencing. Give yourself time, love yourself and know that the feelings you are experiencing are the medicine that will make you whole.

Most people believe that this is exactly what a relationship is: that I am completely with you with my attention, and you are completely with me. But that's not true. On the contrary: only a person who is at peace within themselves can enter into a relationship with someone else.

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Thank you for your question.

Making peace with your own limitations

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[Simone:] Next, I may read out a question from Maria.

[Dhyan Mikael:] Hello Maria.

[Simone:] "Dear Mikael, nice to see you live. I have great fears that have overtaken my life. My body is also reacting strongly. The joy is also gone. Can you please give me a few words? Thank you."

[Dhyan Mikael:] What are you afraid of?

I'll wait for your answer, but I'll talk a bit more. Simone, when the answer comes, please just interrupt me.

[Simone:] It's already there: "of failure", says Maria.

[Dhyan Mikael:] Ah. Yes. I know that well.

Yes, what if you fail? What if someone finds out that you're not as good as you're supposed to be? What if you make a mistake, what if you mess up?

I used to think I could do everything.

I couldn't do everything, of course, but my belief that I should be able to do everything – and do it well – was so strong that I really believed it. I wasn't as clever as you. I wasn't afraid of failure – I wasn't that close to myself – but of course that was behind it.

Then I came to Soham, my spiritual Master, twenty-five years ago, and when I met him, I immediately became part of his team and from then on, I traveled with him and took care of a lot of things, mainly the technique. And of course I'm good at what I do – I just enjoy it – but of course, I also do all sorts of things wrong, all the time, even today.

And with Soham as my boss, so to speak – Soham was not only my spiritual Master and is still my spiritual Master, but he was also my boss, so to speak, because I worked for him – I had a wonderful opportunity, because he is an enlightened boss. He is a spiritual Guru. And with him, I was able to learn to be how I really am: so limited, so human.

I learned that my capacities and abilities are much smaller than I thought. And then I had to make peace with that – with the feelings that go with it. And that is the crucial point. That's what will set you free in this situation. Fear is not the emotion at stake here. Fear is simply a defensive reaction. But underneath... if you are really quiet with yourself and give it a bit of time and space when you are alone, then you can explore what is actually possible for you and what is not – if you are really honest with yourself.

For example, one of my specialties was that I could never say 'no'. Whenever someone needed or wanted something because they had a technical problem or needed technical help somewhere or any other kind of help... I always said 'yes', but not because I could do so much, not because I had so much capacity, but because I was afraid to say 'no'. I was afraid of saying: I can't do that, be it because I don't have the time or because I don't have the ability or because I don't trust myself to do it. And then I had to learn to say 'no'. It was so hard for me. It really gets to the ego.

And then I learned what an immense liberation it is – firstly to be honest with myself and then also to be honest with others. To say: "No, I can't do that, I'm sorry."

And then I learned to make mistakes. I mean, of course I also made mistakes before, but then I learned to own up to my mistakes and to know that it's simply part of it. If someone came to me and said: "you messed that up, that's total crap what you did", and then to say: "Yes, I messed that up. I wish I'd done better. You're right."

That was hard at first, but such a relief. You know, it's like I slowly got to know myself for how I really am. And I think that is the same for everyone. We have this idea of ourselves, and of course we project it outwards to our partner or boss or colleagues or whoever – not because they want us to be like that, but primarily because we believe we should be like that.

And the fear you have simply says: "Listen, I know I'm not like that. What you're playing at, what you're pretending to be, the way you want to be, the way you're pretending to be, that's not the way I am at all." That is what the fear says. It knows exactly that this can't go on for long. That's how it was with me.

But if you make peace with how you really are... Probably nothing is going wrong for you at the moment. The fear is probably purely hypothetical because you've started your new job. But if you are for yourself... When you are ready to accept yourself as you really are, with your flaws, with your limitations, with your inabilities, then you get freedom – freedom to deal with it. If you then fail somewhere, you can go to your boss and say: "Listen, I've messed something up.

Somehow, I've done something wrong. Maybe you can tell me how to do it better, but I'm not happy with what I've done." Then you can see that; then you can accept it internally, and then there is always an easy way out there, at work or in life, to deal with it somehow. The real problem is that we don't actually want that ourselves. The real problem is that we ourselves believe we should be different, and that's incredibly stressful.

If you're willing to accept yourself as you really are, with your flaws, with your limitations, with your inabilities, then you get freedom – freedom to deal with it. The real problem is that we ourselves believe we should be different, and that's incredibly stressful.

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And then I was very lucky to learn that, and so my work just became a joy. Of course, I still did all sorts of things wrong, even today. It was only today that I did something wrong again. I do something wrong every day. But I know myself by now, and other people know me too. They know: Mikael makes mistakes. Everyone else makes mistakes too, of course – but I know that I make mistakes.

And if someone were to say to me today – of course that wouldn't happen... If someone were to say to me today: "How can that be, that you did something wrong there", then I say: "I am like that. I am sorry. I am human. And I'll probably make mistakes tomorrow too, even though I am trying my hardest. I am like this."

Fear tells you... It's as if the fear is your own self telling you: "Listen, take me as I really am." And then you can make your job easier: if you accept your own limitations and know your own weaknesses. I got to know my weaknesses, and then it became much easier for me to deal with them. Then I could say to people: "Listen... just so you know, I have a really hard time with this and that. So, watch out!

I'm probably doing something wrong." And then everything becomes easier – for me, but also for my colleagues. When you get to know yourself and accept yourself for the way you are as a person, as Maria, then everything becomes easier, and then the fear also disappears. When you are close to yourself, then the fear disappears.

When you get to know yourself and accept yourself as you are as a human being, then everything becomes easier and then the fear also disappears.

When you are close to yourself, the fear disappears.

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Maybe you lose your job because your boss thinks you are not qualified enough, but you know: you did your best. You know: if it's not meant to be, then something else will come along, because you are the way you are. But this despair, this deep fear, that comes from being far away from yourself and actually putting yourself under pressure. That's the really difficult thing about this thing, and I used to be a master at it.

This despair, this deep fear, that comes from being far away from yourself and actually putting yourself under pressure.

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And I then became so good at accepting myself and owning up to my mistakes that I was actually given the task of being the scapegoat because I was good at it. I was then responsible for the technique in Satsang, and whenever something didn't work out, it was always: "It's Mikael's fault." Then everyone was happy – they knew who was to blame – and then, Satsang could continue. And I no longer had a problem with that.

And whether it was my fault or not didn't really matter anymore. It was useful for Satsang, and it helped me to become even more at peace with myself. And my ego got hit more and more, which was also good. And then everything became easy and simple. I don't know whether what I've told you will actually help you, but I can imagine that there is something for you in it. If not, please feel free to ask again. Thank you, Maria.

I am happy you are here.

[Simone:] Alexandra B just wrote: "Dear Mikael, thank you so much for your words, what a blessing."

And I have another question from Martina to read out.

[Dhyan Mikael:] I would like to say something very briefly to Alexandra. Excuse me. I am always so touched when what I say, which simply comes from my experience... I have a blessed life, and by simply telling what I experience and how it can go... If that touches you and does you good, that is such a gift for me. So, I'm always completely stunned. So, Simone, please... continue.

Doing nothing in meditation

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[Simone:] Thank you. Martina has a question, it's about Samarpan Meditation. So, there are two questions. Let me start. "Dear Mikael, I have two questions for you. Firstly... It is said that during Samarpan Meditation, we stay with our attention in the crown chakra. We don't do anything, we don't expect anything, we don't evaluate anything.

This doing nothing is not quite clear to me, because when I feel my attention at the crown, which is repeatedly disturbed by thoughts, and quite often at that, then I have to gather my concentration again and direct it back to the crown in order to immerse myself in the flow. That feels like an active action to me and is not doing nothing, is it? Can you say something about that?"

[Dhyan Mikael:] Yes, I would love to.

Yes, you're right. It's like we are resting here. We park our attention here. We say for half an hour: I want my peace and quiet now. I'm going on vacation now, vacation from my thoughts, vacation from all the stuff that usually goes on a few stories below, and I'm just going to rest in the crown chakra. And you are right: thoughts immediately pull at you; all kinds of things pull at your attention. And that's the reason why we meditate: to experience exactly that. And you're right: your attention then ends up somewhere else in no time.

You suddenly realize that you're thinking about the office or your husband, or your big toe itches and you wonder what's going on down there, but you're not up here with your attention. And then the exercise consists of going back here with your attention – nothing more. That's the only thing we do – but in a playful way. By doing nothing I mean: there is no goal, there is no must. You don't do something in order to achieve a certain result. It's like lying in a hammock and doing nothing, but of course you lie in the hammock and that is also doing.

It is not serious. Swamiji – that's the Indian Guru who teaches Samarpan Meditation – says: do it like a hobby, without seriousness, completely relaxed, more like a game. You go there with your attention, simply because it's incredibly good for you. And then, you notice how your thoughts have diverted your attention, and then you can say quite playfully: "Whoops, now they've done it again", and you simply march back to the crown chakra as easily as you can. Sometimes I don't feel it at all.

I sit there with my eyes closed, and sometimes I can't even feel where the crown chakra is because my head is so busy, but then I go in that direction with my attention as best I can, and just stay there as best I can... again and again, always again, as non-seriously and as relaxed as I can. Yes. And that doesn't feel like anything earth-shattering at all. It actually feels quite easy, even if you almost never succeed because, as I said, your thoughts keep interfering.

But this one act of bringing your attention to the crown chakra again and again, completely relaxed, without haste, without fighting your thoughts, without judgment... this one act will change your entire life. You don't know how. It's indirect. It's not that after meditation you suddenly wake up and everything is different. Your life changes very gradually, without you knowing the direct connection to what you are "not doing" in that half hour, but that's how it is.

It doesn't feel like anything earth-shattering. But this one act of bringing your attention to the crown chakra again and again, in a relaxed way, without rushing, without fighting thoughts, without judgment... this one act will change your whole life. You don't know how. It's indirect.

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How to become a disciple of Swamiji?

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Simone, there was a second question.

[Simone:] Yes, exactly.

I'll read it out now.

"I would like to become a disciple of Swamiji and would like to know if there is a specific ritual or something similar. In Tibetan Buddhism, you take refuge in a Master and sit directly with him. Can you please explain this to me? Thank you very much from Martina."

[Dhyan Mikael:] That's great. Yes, with Swamiji it's not that you go to him and then sit with him, but just wanting to be his disciple changes everything. And there are also certain rituals in India. If you want to do something like that... you can just write me an email and I'll refer you to the people who can help you. Or you can write to Samarpan Meditation Germany at info@samarpan-meditation.de. You can just write to them and ask them exactly this question and they will answer you. They are the specialists for this.

For me it was like this... The moment Swamiji came into my life; the moment... and he didn't come into my life personally. It so happened that Soham, my spiritual Master, told me about Swamiji one evening. And the moment I heard about him for the first time, it was as if I was transformed; as if I had been waiting for this Guru, who I knew nothing about before, all my life or many lives. And I was basically his disciple from one moment to the next, without any ritual. I heard about him and I was just as open as you can be, and I've been his disciple ever since.

And when you do the Samarpan Meditation, when you rest here... that's my connection to Swamiji. When I rest here, I sit at his feet. When I rest here with my attention, it's like his feet start here. In India... "The feet of the Guru": this does not mean his physical feet, but his energy – the Guru energy; that which flows through him. And it's really like this: when I want to connect with Swamiji, I go to my crown chakra, and then I sit at his feet there.

And I can do that all day long. I can't travel to India, and as far as I know, he doesn't have people who are with him all the time and sit with him. As far as I know, that's not the case. But I can sit at his feet the whole time I'm awake by resting in the crown chakra. That's how I do it. But, as I said, you can also ask the Swamiji people directly, they can give you authorized answers.

And that changed my life, completely: just this suddenly being his disciple... As I said, in my life it was without ritual; it was just like that, from one moment to the next, and I've been with him ever since, even though I've never been to India. But whenever he is in Germany or in Europe, I go to see him. That makes me very happy. I am very touched. Thank you, Martina.

[Simone:] Mikael, I would like to briefly read out two pieces of feedback. Maria writes: "Yes, you helped me a lot. Thank you very much. Now I'm going to try it out and see through the perfect Maria."

[Dhyan Mikael:] Oh, that's good. If the perfect Maria dies, then you become beautiful, then you become interesting. Yes, that's good. Nobody needs the perfect Maria. I'm happy.

[Simone:] Andrea H also wrote: "Your words are balm for my soul, so wonderful and helpful. Many, many thanks for you."

[Dhyan Mikael:] Thank you. Thank you for your words, I am very happy.

[Simone:] And Martina just wrote: "Many, many thanks for your clear words, they help me a lot. Martina."

[Dhyan Mikael:] Thank you for being here. And thank you for your questions. I am so touched that I can speak to you.

[Simone:] That's all the questions for now, Mikael.

Support me if it gives you joy

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[Dhyan Mikael:] Then I would like to take the opportunity to point out that there will also be a chance to meet me in person soon. In two weeks, two weeks from tomorrow, the Non-Duality days in Upper Austria will start, which are organized by Jetzt-TV, by Devasetu.

I'm allowed to be there too; there are seven Satsang teachers in total, I think, six or seven, and each of them will give four Satsangs during these two days – that's at the weekend, it goes from Friday evening to Sunday evening – including me. And if you feel like it, come there and we can get to know each other personally and you can sit in Satsang. If you feel like it, you can do a real little retreat with me there. I'm sure it will be really, really nice.

It's a wonderful place. I'm looking forward to traveling to Austria for the first time with Satsang. I am really looking forward to it. And if you would like information about it: I have put together some information on my website. Just go to my website, dhyanmikael.de, and on the page with the dates you will find all the information about this event. But on Jetzt-TV, on the Jetzt-TV website, you'll also find all the information you need.

And since I have just enough time before I continue, I would like to point out that everything I do here is free of charge. Satsangs are free, my videos are free, everything I offer online is free. And that has to be this way, because what I pass on here is nothing that I produce or do. I only pass on what I myself have simply received as a gift. You can't sell the Truth, the Secret of Life.

But for very practical reasons, I am happy when people support me, for the very simple reason that it takes a lot of time to make and publish videos; and everything I do, I try to do very beautifully and very well, and it really takes a lot of time. And so that I can take this time, I need support somehow, otherwise I just don't have the time. And the more people support me, the more time I can take. And as I said, everything that I do is free, and nobody should feel obliged. That's very important to me, that everyone can simply enjoy everything I do.

But if you feel like it, if you enjoy it, then support me. That makes me really happy and makes my joyful work – I don't want to call it work, it's not really work at all, it's just joy and a blessing for me... then you help me to do it. And if you feel like it, you can find information on how to do this on the donation page of my website. The easiest way for me is if you become a member; you can donate a few euros a month or more, as you like, every month. It's all automatic, and that helps me the most. But you can also donate in various other ways.

I have compiled the information for this there. And Devasetu from Jetzt-TV is also happy to receive donations. What he does is also all free – this gigantic work that he has been doing for many, many years is all free. It's incredible, but of course it also takes money and lots and lots of time, and he is also happy to receive support. And if you feel like supporting Jetzt-TV, you'll find lots of information on the Jetzt-TV website. Yes, I'm glad I could say that now and not at the very end when time is already running out.

Don't look how far the darkness goes

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Simone, should I read something out now, or do you have something by now?

[Simone:] No, please read something, Mikael.

[Dhyan Mikael:] Yes, I'd love to.

"Dear Mikael, our global political situation is preoccupying many people right now. The European elections with the right-wing parties or the war in Russia and Ukraine or the situation in the Gaza Strip... Can you say something about this?"

Yes, I often get questions like this, and the answer is always the same.

And the answer I give here may seem a bit strange to you, because nobody else says it.

You can't change the world.

You can't change your partner. You can't even change yourself.

You can't change the world. You can't change your partner. You can't even change yourself.

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And to worry about something means: you give it your attention. And that means: you give it energy – you promote it. That's a good example... if something terrible happens, and all the news channels have it then, and all the newspapers, and you read it then: and then you absorb this negative energy that happens with it, and at the same time you promote it, through your attention. And the more people give it attention, the more it's promoted, whether you mean well or not.

To worry about something means: you give it your attention. And that means: you give it energy – you promote it.

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Even protesting or fighting against something doesn't help – nothing at all. I know it's totally popular, it's totally in: you demonstrate against war – then you wage war against the war.

And it feels good and right, and you do something, but in reality, it does no good at all, on the contrary. In reality, it only makes it worse – even if you mean well.

Protesting or fighting against something is useless. You demonstrate against war – then you wage war against war. And it feels good and right and you do something, but it does no good, on the contrary. In reality, it only makes it worse – even if you mean well.

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Most people don't know it, but the attention you have is like a beam of energy: whatever you direct it at grows.

That's why Samarpan Meditation is so helpful. When you turn your attention inwards, and inside starts here (at the crown chakra)... The inside I'm talking about has nothing to do with your feelings; nothing to do with your emotional or psychological inner life. That's all outside; that's all part of the body. But the inside of which I speak is completely unknown to you, and when you do the meditation, you get to know this inside very, very slowly; this inside of which Jesus spoke – the Kingdom of God; Heaven.

It is completely unknown to you, but when you do the meditation, you get to know it very slowly: this inside that Jesus spoke of – the Kingdom of God; Heaven. When you focus your attention on it, your life begins to change for the better, even though you can't explain it at all.

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And when you focus your attention on it, when you start doing it, it grows, and although you can't explain to yourself how this is possible, your life begins to change for the better. You focus your attention on your inner self, on your soul, even though you don't even recognize it yet. You don't even know what you're doing when you meditate, but it grows. Your life gradually becomes problem-free, peaceful and happy because you direct your energy, your attention, to the source of life, which is within you.

You direct your attention to your inner self, to your soul, even though you don't even recognize it yet. You don't know what you are doing when you meditate, but it grows. Your life gradually becomes problem-free, peaceful and happy because you direct your energy, your attention, to the source of life, and that is within you.

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This is what Jesus spoke about all the time. He said... this is something that most people didn't understand. They thought he was saying something in a figurative sense, but Jesus was always just speaking very practically. He said: "Put God first, and everything else will follow." He said: if you turn your attention inwards, to your soul, to God... And he said: "Heaven is within your reach." He knew: it is as far as you can reach: up there (at the crown chakra). If you direct your attention there, inwards, then everything else that is essential arises from it – by itself.

This is what Jesus spoke about all the time. He said: "Put God first, and everything else will follow." He said: if you turn your attention inwards, to your soul, to God... And he said: "Heaven is within your reach." He knew: it's as far as you can reach: up there, at the crown chakra.

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And it's the same the other way round: if you focus your attention on the negative things in your life or in the world, then they become stronger. And since the whole world... ninety-nine percent of people do that, and that's why it's getting worse. I don't do that. My life is different. Swamiji says something very interesting. He says, "Don't look at how far the darkness goes. You will never find the end of darkness. Instead, kindle your own lamp, and then the world around you becomes bright.

And it's the same the other way around: if you focus your attention on the negative things in your life or in the world, they get stronger. Ninety-nine percent of people do that, and that's why it gets worse. I don't do that. My life is different.

Link to quote in video at 48m00s

Your world is bright." And if all people do this, the world will become brighter and brighter. Imagine you are standing in a huge room, and it is completely dark. No matter how far you go, you won't find the end of the darkness. But light a tiny match and there is light all around you. That is within your power – and that changes the world. And that is the only thing that can change the world for the better. And it works.

Swamiji says: "Don't look how far the darkness goes. You will never find the end of darkness. Instead, light your own lamp, and then the world around you will become bright." That is within your power – and that changes the world. And that is the only thing that can change the world for the better.

Link to quote in video at 48m30s

And "lighting your own lamp" means: illuminating yourself; turning your attention inwards, meditating, allowing your soul to grow – then your inner self becomes bright. Your life becomes bright and you shine, you radiate. And this radiates to other people, and then they start to do the same. Then they start to light their own lamp, and so it goes on and on.

Jesus lived in very turbulent times.

He lived in an occupied country. His people, the Jews, were oppressed by the brutal rule of the Romans. There was not much to laugh about.

He did not devote one iota of his attention to these things. His disciples were concerned about them – about other people, about the poor, about the political situation. Judas wanted to get involved. Jesus always said: "No, I don't want to have anything to do with that. What are you talking about? Put God first." And that really means: revitalizing your inner self, and then, the rest will happen by itself. Everything we think we are doing good out there is usually exactly the opposite of what we want to achieve.

Jesus did not devote one iota of his attention to these things. His disciples were worried – about the poor, about the political situation. But Jesus always said: "What are you talking about? Put God first." And that really means to revitalize your inner self, and then, the rest will happen by itself.

Link to quote in video at 50m47s

And that's why I don't watch the news.

I don't worry about it either.

I'd like to tell you a story I read the other day about a Zen monk in Japan. This Zen monk was a student of a great Master and naturally became more and more of a respected Master himself, and he was invited by some of his students, who admired him very much, to meditate together with other friends and to listen to his lecture. And then he came at the appointed hour to the place where they were to meet, which I think was on the fourth or sixth floor of a building in Japan.

And everyone gathered in the room; everyone was ready. And then the Earth started to shake. There was a strong earthquake. The whole house shook. The furniture slid through the house. Earthquakes are very common in Japan. And people panicked. They rushed out of the house, they were worried. The monk stayed seated, closed his eyes and didn't move. And when the earthquake was over, people slowly came back into the house and found the monk sitting there with his eyes closed, deeply absorbed.

And they said: "We were so nervous; we were so scared. Weren't you nervous when the Earth shook? Were you not afraid?" And he said: "Yes, yes, I was very nervous. I was afraid that at the moment of my death I wouldn't be at rest within myself – that I wouldn't be where I wanted to be; that I wouldn't be where it mattered, but that I was worrying about something; that I was out there with my attention." That was his worry, and he immediately closed his eyes and put his attention back where it belonged.

So radical.

In the thousands of years since Jesus died, there have been an infinite number of people who have tried to do good in the world; who have fought for good – all forgotten. Jesus did not fight. Jesus did exactly that... He did exactly this, which nobody understands – what he says: "Put God first", means: stay with your attention inside, with your soul, in the crown chakra.

That's where the only thing of value happens. And we can still feel his energy today. All the good people who have done all sorts of great things for the world – all forgotten, all falling to dust or just terrible things coming out of it. But this one person who did what nobody understands – we still know about him today. His energy can still be felt today; just like Buddha, he was the same.

Since Jesus died, there have been an infinite number of people who have fought for good – all of them forgotten. Jesus did not fight. He did what no one understands: "Put God first". This means: keep your attention within, with your soul, in the crown chakra. That's where the only thing of value happens.

Link to quote in video at 54m22s

And that changes the world – only that. And that's why... I know that and I experience it in my life, and that's why I don't pay any attention to all these negative things.

Every moment I waste on it, I'm missing out; in that time, I could be doing something much more useful for myself and for the world with my attention. And sometimes I do anyway. I'm no angel either. Sometimes I'm on Facebook and I'm looking at things and then fifteen minutes have passed before I realize what I'm even doing there and then I realize: "What am I actually doing here? What am I actually doing here?" But no one else will tell you that – except Swamiji of course, that's where I got it from.

You won't achieve security and stability and peace in your life by paying attention to war, discord and worries – on the contrary. But if you nurture your inner peace; if you nurture your inner stillness, if you nurture your Kingdom of Heaven, then everything else in your life changes. What Jesus said is so true – literally. That's how it is in my life. That's what I can say about it – about all these issues: there's no need to worry.

You won't achieve security and stability and peace in your life by paying attention to war, discord and worries – on the contrary. But if you nurture your inner peace; if you nurture your inner stillness, if you nurture your Kingdom of Heaven, then everything else in your life changes.

Link to quote in video at 57m06s

But meditate – that's the important thing.

What Jesus said is so true – literally. That's how it is in my life. That's what I can say about it – about all these issues: there's no need to worry. But meditate – that's the important thing.

Link to quote in video at 57m48s

And this is not ignoring reality. It is rather the other way around. Once you have come to know this reality that Jesus already spoke of, that all the Gurus and all the sages and all the saints speak of, then you know from your own experience that what everyone else in the world believes in doesn't work and only has the opposite effect.

And this is not ignoring reality. It is rather the other way around. Once you have come to know this reality that Jesus already spoke of, that all the saints speak of, then you know from your own experience that what all people believe in does not work and only has the opposite effect.

Link to quote in video at 58m10s

Yes... So much for that.

Simone, may I continue, or do you have something now?

[Simone:] I have something now, Mikael.

[Dhyan Mikael:] Ah, how nice. Please.

[Simone:] Two responses have just come in. Ursula Klezer: "I am deeply touched. Thank you so much."

[Dhyan Mikael:] It's a pleasure to be able to speak to you.

[Simone:] And Maria: "Thank you for the helpful words."

[Dhyan Mikael:] Thank you, Maria.

On being willing to be wrong

Link to topic in video at 59m25s

[Simone:] And Hiranyakashipu has another question that I would like to read out.

[Dhyan Mikael:] Hello, nice to have you here.

[Simone:] "Would you like to say something else about shame – the experience of being deeply inadequate and wrong?"

[Dhyan Mikael:] Ah, I'm a specialist in that. Yes... I designed a postcard in spring. I ask the people to support me if they enjoy it; I've just done the same with you. And once a year, I send a little postcard to all the people who support me as a thank you, and it says... I don't know, I've just run out. Hang on, I'll just get it.

Here it is, this is what it looks like... It's hard to see here.

"Whenever you are true to yourself, it feels wrong. For that you have to be willing: to be wrong."

And what you are talking about here, this shame, this being wrong, that's the core of the spiritual path. I printed this saying on my first annual postcard from this spring because this is what my spiritual Master taught me at the very beginning, twenty-five years ago, as the very first thing, and this has determined my entire path to this day: the willingness to be wrong; the willingness to be the way I am, even though I am wrong.

If you can make friends with this shame, with this inadequacy, with this wrongness, then you are free.

This shame, this wrongness, that is the core of the spiritual path: the willingness to be wrong – to be as I am, even though I am wrong. If you can make friends with it, with this shame, with this inadequacy, with this wrongness, then you are free.

Link to quote in video at 1h00m46s

This is what my Master told me twenty-five years ago. Today I am free. I'm still wrong – but I'm willing to be wrong, and now I am free.

Today I am free. I'm still wrong – but I'm willing to be wrong, and now I am free.

Link to quote in video at 1h01m59s

And you don't learn that overnight. It goes deep.

What you are talking about is... I was just saying: that is the core of the spiritual path – because this conviction, "I am wrong", is what separates me from myself and therefore from God. "I am wrong, I have to be different." And if I can't be the way I am – I am like that anyway – then I am far from myself.

Then I abandon myself.

And this story, this challenge, is so old that it is even in the Bible. One of the very first stories in the Bible is about Adam and Eve in paradise. You may remember the story. It's beautiful because it describes exactly what you are experiencing. Adam and Eve – this image stands for humanity. This story of paradise describes humanity as it was back then. Adam and Eve lived in paradise, and everything was good and they were one with God. God came by every day, and they had a chat.

This is the core of the spiritual path – because this conviction that "I am wrong" is what separates me from myself and therefore from God. And if I cannot be the way I am, then I am far from myself. Then I abandon myself. And this story is so old that it's even in the Bible.

Link to quote in video at 1h02m37s

There was no problem at all. But one day... there was this tree in paradise, the tree of knowledge of good and evil. And God said to Adam and Eve: you can do anything; have fun; do what you want – but, please, don't eat from this tree, because if you do, you'll spoil everything. But people have eaten the fruit, the apple, from this tree, and that is an image of the fact that people began to be able to judge: the fruit of knowledge about good and bad.

It is the time in the development of the human ability, the human, incredibly ingenious apparatus up here, to judge: this is good, and this is bad. We ate of this fruit – that is: we had become capable of it, and the first thing we judged was ourselves. And in the story of paradise, it is described so beautifully. The next day, God came by Adam and Eve as usual, but he couldn't find Adam. And he said, "Adam, where are you?" Adam was hiding. God said, "Adam, what's wrong?

In paradise was this tree of knowledge about good and evil. And God said: "do what you want – but don't eat from this tree". But we ate of this fruit – that means: we had become capable of it, and the first thing we judged was ourselves.

Link to quote in video at 1h04m04s

Why are you hiding?" And Adam said, "Because I'm naked." And God says, "Who told you that you're naked?" And that's a metaphor: Adam says, "There's something wrong with me – I can't show myself to you like this." And God says: "Who told you there is something wrong with you?" It wasn't God – it was ourselves. We became capable of judging ourselves – and that was the end of paradise. And we've been living in hell ever since.

Adam said: "Because I am naked." That's a metaphor: Adam says, "There's something wrong with me – I can't show myself to you like this." And God says: "Who told you that?" It wasn't God – it was us. We became capable of judging ourselves – and that was the end of paradise. And we've been living in hell ever since.

Link to quote in video at 1h05m46s

This shame you're talking about, this wrongness, it's not your mother's or your father's fault that they did something wrong with you; it's not my mother's or father's fault either. It's part of being human. We became capable of it back then. And now, now we are slowly learning to deal with this ability.

We are now learning to be these incredibly sensitive and capable beings – without judging ourselves; to not misuse this apparatus that we have, this body. God said it. God knew exactly what was happening. God knew we're getting smarter, we're getting more capable, and he said: "Do what you want, eat anything, but not this fruit." And now we're learning to deal with it.

We're learning to stop judging ourselves. And before you can learn that, you have to make peace with being wrong. You are not wrong – only your head tells you that; but knowing that does you no good. The only way out of it is into it: "Okay, I'm wrong." Everything in you says: you are wrong. And if you believe this yourself, other people on the outside will mirror it back to you very helpfully.

Your partner tells you often enough that you are wrong, and your boss probably does too. And we get evidence everywhere that we are wrong. And make peace with that. It's very similar to what I was talking about earlier, when it came to being afraid of failing. It's basically the same thing: "Yes, I am like that." For me it's like... You know, I'm still wrong with everything I do. I have this heritage too.

We're learning to stop judging ourselves. And before you can learn that, you have to make peace with being wrong. You are not wrong – only your head tells you that; but knowing that does you no good. The only way out of it is into it: "Okay, I'm wrong."

Link to quote in video at 1h07m40s

Every person has that legacy. My videos aren't good enough. I don't make enough videos. I don't answer fast enough. Everything I do is wrong – in my eyes. It's just this machine up there. And what I learned many, many years ago is to say: "Okay, I am like this. God, I am like this. And if that means that I die, then I die, but I am like this. And if no one likes me, okay, but I am like this."

I'm still wrong with everything I do. I have this heritage too. Everyone has this heritage. And what I've learned is to say, "Okay, I am like this. God, I am like this. And if that means I am going to die, then I am going to die, but I am like this. And if nobody likes me, okay, but I am like this."

Link to quote in video at 1h08m44s

So, what you're talking about is the legacy of humanity. It's not because there is something wrong with you – there is something wrong with all of us. We all believe that; every single one of us. I don't know a single person for whom that wouldn't be true.

Make peace with your feelings. Be willing to be wrong. Then it becomes really easy.

And then, when someone comes up to you and says: "Hey, what's that all about? You're really weird, you are really wrong"... If you can then say: "Yes, you are right. I am wrong, that is true", then you are free. Then you can run up to God again and no longer be afraid. And sometimes, when I'm sure that I've really messed something up again, I often take this into the crown chakra while meditating – like a child who says: "Look, God, this is how I really am. This is how I am – so wrong; this is how I am."

Make peace with your feelings. Be willing to be wrong. And then, when someone comes to you and says: "You're wrong" and you can say: "You are right. I am wrong", then you are free. Then you can run up to God again and no longer be afraid.

Link to quote in video at 1h09m51s

And then I hear the laughter of God.

And sometimes, when I'm sure that I've really messed something up again, I often take this into the crown chakra while meditating – like a child who says: "Look, God, this is how I really am. This is how I am – so wrong; this is how I am." And then I hear the laughter of God.

Link to quote in video at 1h10m30s

In this wrongness we are all brothers and sisters, all together.

Do what you yourself are at peace with

Link to topic in video at 1h11m18s

[Simone:] I have one more question.

[Dhyan Mikael:] Yes, please.

[Simone:] From Amodini.

[Dhyan Mikael:] Amodini, hello, how nice.

[Simone:] "Hello dear Mikael. Amodini here. Yesterday my mother wrote to me that she got sad that we don't communicate much. What's the best answer to that?"

[Dhyan Mikael:] That's quite something.

I can say two things about it. One is a tip from my spiritual Master Soham, who you also know, and he said: you can just write to her from time to time – just a postcard, something, a short greeting: "Hey, we were just thinking about you. We wish you a nice Sunday. Everything's okay here. Best wishes." And then they are really happy, it's a minute for you, and they are totally happy.

And Swamiji says something really interesting about it. I really learned something from that too. He said: it's important that you have a good relationship with these people. And what he means by that is not that you have an exemplary relationship with those on the outside. He made that clear at some point; unfortunately, I don't know exactly where. It's about your inner relationship: that you feel good about the way you behave there.

You could of course just block it out now and say: "I'm not in the mood. I don't want to have anything to do with that woman, she should leave me alone. She has no right to expect that I contact her if I don't want to." And everything you would say here would probably be true somehow. But that doesn't help you because you won't feel comfortable with it yourself, otherwise, you wouldn't be asking me. Do something with which you can be at peace with yourself – and these are often just little things.

You know, as a person you are probably similar to me. When I communicate with someone and get in touch, I make a big deal out of it. It's not my style to just send a short greeting. I write a really long letter, that's when I really get down to business, and I don't really feel like doing that – but that's usually not what these people are interested in.

My mother, for example, is really happy when I just write to her briefly and reply briefly to when she has written. My mother is like that too... She also used to say: "Hey, it's a shame we're not in touch more often", and that used to really annoy me.

I thought: "Why is she like that? She shouldn't be like this." But then I learned – through what Soham said and through what Swamiji said – to take it much easier. I realized that it was actually my own seriousness that was playing tricks on me. And now I write from time to time, I even visit her more often and I realize that it's actually fun. But I do it in my own way, in a very light and relaxed way, without any seriousness.

Of course, I wouldn't respond to the accusation. I wouldn't start discussing it with her, but, you know, just a sign of life every now and then... Well, it works really well between me and my mother, and, as I said, I'm enjoying it now. I'm actually more of a hermit type, and that means I have a tendency to isolate myself.

But when I get these impulses from outside and don't take them as seriously as I used to, but think: "Ah yes, I'll take this as an opportunity to peek out of my shell a bit and make casual contact", then the others are totally happy and I'm relaxed – and sometimes I even like it. So, my advice to you would be: make it playful. Deal with it playfully, within yourself.

Our kind, people like you and me, we tend to take it very, very seriously and make it very complicated, but it doesn't have to be that way. Of course, there are also cases where you know exactly: if you say 'A', then 'B', 'C' and 'D' will come too, and then she'll beat down your door. You know what works for you and where you need to be careful. I'm not saying that you should do anything that later proves to be problematic for you. But things aren't usually like that.

And if you don't want all that: just be true to yourself. Yes, be true to yourself. No one can ask you to be different.

And if you don't want all that: just be true to yourself. Yes, be true to yourself. No one can ask you to be different.

Link to quote in video at 1h17m48s

Although I tend to be a recluse and can be very particular, I do have the ability to dance very well with other people and adapt to them without harming myself. This is simply a talent which I have and which has always made my life very easy. But other people are different. And if that doesn't work for you and if you know what's good for you, then be true to that. Be true to that.

Yes, maybe this will give you some encouragement somewhere in some direction that is helpful to you. That would make me happy. And if not, then write to me again. Maybe I haven't grasped your point at all. I don't know exactly. Amodini, I send you my warmest regards, to you and your family; your beautiful family.

[Simone:] Amodini has already answered something. She writes: "How beautiful – thank you so much. Yes, isolating is the best thing here too. Thank you."

[Dhyan Mikael:] Yes, I know you a little bit from far away and we know each other in this respect; we are similar here.

You can't help your son

Link to topic in video at 1h19m56s

Simone, do you have anything else?

[Simone:] No, I don't have any other questions.

[Dhyan Mikael:] Okay, then I'll see what else I have here.

Here I have a question from a woman who wrote to me some time ago. I'm really sorry that it often takes me a long time to answer questions. I really do my best. I told earlier, when I was talking about donating, that everything I do just takes a lot of time. And I wish I could make more videos. I wish I could have more time to respond. I respond to everything, but sometimes it takes a really long time. That's just the way it is, sorry.

"I have really important questions about my son. He is forty years old and an alcoholic. Until recently, he worked as a care worker for the disabled in a home. Now he's back from a quarterly rehab program in which he worked out with his therapist that this work is a big part of what's happening and that he should look for something new. Although he has his own apartment, he is currently living with me to make it as easy as possible for him to return to normality after rehab.

He takes part in an aftercare group that takes place twice a month; otherwise, he is pretty inactive when it comes to looking for a new job. As a result, I am beginning to feel impatient and even angry about his inertia, which I am forced to watch powerlessly. At the same time, I'm afraid that if I push him, I'll drive him back into his old addictive behavior. I am quite at a loss and would be very happy to hear your view of the situation."

Thank you for your question. I am always so touched by this trust that I am allowed to speak on such things. I would like to say two things about it. One is something you may not like to hear, but it is simply the truth: You can't help him. He is your son. He's your son, and the problems he has he got from you – not because you're wrong or bad, but that's human nature. Jesus said: "Fathers pass on their sins to their sons", and he wasn't saying that fathers are bad, but he was describing how it works. And you are the way you are because of your parents.

And I only mention this to tell you: you can't help him.

You are the last person who can help him.

And the best thing you can do is to be true to yourself. You know, if you like having him with you, if you're really comfortable with it and it makes you happy, then it's a good thing. But if you have him with you when you're annoyed and angry, then you're poisoning the poor guy, and yourself too.

You can't help him. He's your son, and the problems he has come from you – not because you're wrong or bad, but that's human nature. You are the last person who can help him. And the best thing you can do is be true to yourself.

Link to quote in video at 1h22m36s

You think you are doing something good; at the same time, you think he should finally get his act together.

But that's a bad situation; it's neither good for you nor for him.

I can't tell you what that means in practical terms. I can only tell you what you can be guided by. And what you can be guided by is what feels right for you – for yourself. What can you do that is good for you?

This is a bad situation; it's neither good for you nor for him. I can't tell you what that means in practical terms. I can only tell you what you can be guided by, and that is what feels right for you – for yourself. What can you do that is good for you?

Link to quote in video at 1h24m13s

Teach your son to do something that is good for him by doing something that is good for you. In the moment, you're teaching your son how to sacrifice, and he's probably already very good at that. You are doing something you don't want to do because you are afraid that something bad will happen to someone else – and you are teaching him that. I'm not trying to accuse you of anything, please don't get me wrong. I just want to tell you that it's unnecessary. We often think what we're doing is good, but in reality, it's counterproductive, for you and for him.

Teach your son to do something that is good for him by doing something that is good for you. Right now, you're teaching your son how to sacrifice. You're doing something you don't want to do because you're afraid that something bad will happen to someone else – and that's what you're teaching him.

Link to quote in video at 1h24m49s

I've already talked a lot about being wrong.

Taking him in so that you don't potentially make his situation worse is the best way you can avoid feeling wrong, but you're obviously not happy with it. And doing something that feels good to you now probably means that you feel completely wrong.

As I said, you'll have to find out for yourself what it means in practical terms. I can't tell you that. That depends entirely on what your soul tells you. And you can also ask a professional. You can ask an addiction therapist and say: "Listen, is what I'm doing any good at all? I have a suspicion that it's not good at all, because I'm getting angrier and angrier, and I have a feeling that that's a sign that what I'm doing as a mother is actually not good at all." He might tell you something that surprises you... I could imagine. I don't know, I'm not a therapist.

But basically, my advice to you is: take care of yourself. It's high time you took care of yourself.

And the more okay you can be with feeling wrong, the more okay you are with being afraid of doing something wrong, the more okay you are with all the feelings that come with it, the more gently and lovingly and easily you can handle this situation, with you and with him. And you'll be surprised at what comes out of it. I promise you that. And I would like to say one last thing to. I have experienced stories like this in my personal life.

It's time to take care of yourself. And the more okay you can be with feeling wrong, the more gently and lovingly and easily you can handle this situation, with you and with him. And you'll be surprised at what comes out of it.

Link to quote in video at 1h27m17s

And it's not your responsibility to take care of other people's problems like that. You can't. You simply can't do it. If you think it's up to you what this person does and how their life path continues, then you're doing two things. Firstly, you are grossly overestimating yourself. His life is predestined. He has this life because he is supposed to have this life – including the alcohol addiction.

It's not your responsibility to take care of other people's problems like that. You can't. You simply can't do it.

Link to quote in video at 1h28m39s

And if much worse things happen as a result, then that's also part of his path.

And if you take responsibility for it – if you think it's your job and it's up to you – then you make your own life impossible.

But you are free.

I've left people several times in my life, even though I knew it was really hard.

But I knew it was the only way. Everyone else said what I was doing was wrong – everyone. But I knew it couldn't be good that way. What I'm doing here can't be right. I have to do something different. That's what I did. And I did it several times. I'm pretty sure that all these people still believe that I did everything wrong, but today I see: it had to be this way.

No one can take do that for you: to make peace with it. And I would like to encourage you to do that: do what you know is right – no matter what that means. You have to be ready for anything.

No one can take do that for you: to make peace with it. And I would like to encourage you to do that: do what you know is right – no matter what that means. You have to be ready for anything.

Link to quote in video at 1h31m17s

Yes.

I send you every blessing. Thank you for your question.

Oh, wow, 9:30, what happened?

Yes, I'm afraid we have to call it a day.

Thank you for Satsang. Thank you all for this Satsang. I am so happy that we can do this. And I thank Devasetu for creating this wonderful opportunity to do this here regularly. Next month, there will be another Satsang. You can write to me; I make videos in which I answer questions. Soon there will be Satsang in Upper Austria. I look forward to hearing from you. If you want to write to me, you can find my contact details on my website, on the Ask-me page. Thank you for being here. I love you. Thank you for Satsang. Have a nice evening.