Online Satsang of February 6, 2024

[Dhyan Mikael:] Good evening. Welcome to Online Satsang. Nice to have you here. I'm delighted.

If you're here for the first time, I'd like to briefly explain what we do here. Here in Satsang you can ask a question, if you like, either in the chat in writing via YouTube or here in Zoom, and then, Simone will read out your questions and I will say something about it if I can. But you can also ask a question live in Zoom via video, just as you like.

And if you do that, just raise your hand in Zoom... there's a button you can use to give a hand signal. Then, Simone will know that you would like to speak to me, and I will tell you when it's your turn. I look forward to our evening here together. Simone, is there anything you could already read out?

[Simone:] No, there are no questions at the moment, Mikael.

[Dhyan Mikael:] All right.

The crown chakra and Sahaja Yoga

Link to topic in video at 1m30s

[Simone:] Something is just coming in, Mikael. I'll read it out. "Hello Mikael. I'm very pleased that there's another Satsang with you tonight. I have a question. Recently, a meditation series with Sahaja Yoga was suggested to me on YouTube. Then I did a little research and tried it out. There you concentrate on the crown chakra, just like in Samarpan Meditation, and you do a few other things. If you know Sahaja Yoga, could you explain the difference?"

[Dhyan Mikael:] I somehow still have a strange sound here with me. Is that coming from you, Simone? Someone's microphone is open. It's quiet now. Okay. Good. Thank you, Simone.

Yes, thank you for the question. I honestly can't say anything about it because I don't know it. I only know Samarpan Meditation, but I don't know this form of yoga that you're talking about. It is certainly the case that this meditation can also be incorporated into other practices. As far as I know, the meditation stands on its own.

You can of course incorporate it somewhere if you like, but for the meditation to be effective, you don't have to do other things like yoga or anything else alongside it, which is of course still great. I have nothing against yoga at all, I do it myself. But I can't make a direct comparison because I'm not familiar with it. Yes. Thanks for your question. I'm glad you're here.

[Simone:] There are no further questions, Mikael.

[Dhyan Mikael:] Okay, I'll see what I've got here. I got some questions via email for this Online Satsang.

Insecure from ego

Link to topic in video at 3m52s

"How can I let my ego influence me less during the day. It's so loud, and I often feel insecure and confused. Feeling the big things seems easier. I get lost easily with the little things, and I find it difficult to look after myself and to see what is right for me and what I need. It's probably also a question of discipline."

Thank you for the question.

That's how we learn. It's not like you can do something specific and then you have clarity from one day to the next. I feel the same way as you, maybe not to the same extent, but I know the same thing. I usually don't know what is the right thing to do. I either wait, or I try out what seems obvious to me, and then I see where it leads.

So, for me, it's not that I always feel more confident in what I do and what I decide. It's more the other way around. It's more that I'm learning to trust more and more that everything, even though I have no idea and even though I'm unsure and even though I mostly don't know what the right decision is or what I should do now... I have more and more confidence that everything will unfold perfectly even though I am the way I am. People like to imagine that when you find yourself and become enlightened, let's put it this way, that you then have everything under control.

But I actually experience the opposite. You have less and less under control, and the more everything slips away from you, the more you learn that you don't actually have to have anything under control. Especially when it comes to taking care of yourself, for me it's a permanent learning process, a permanent trial and error that never really stops. It's not the case that you reach a point where you know everything exactly and then you know how you should live from now on.

I simply relax more by looking anew every day to see: "What fits now?" In other words, I always experience each moment anew, so to speak: "What's right, right now?" without being one hundred percent sure.

Yes, that's how I experience it. So, striving for some kind of tangible clarity is something you just have to give up. I could also put it in esoteric terms and say: the person inside you who wants this clarity slowly disappears, and at some point, you know that everything is okay, even though you are so limited as a person and so... I like to say about myself: so stupid. Thank you for the question. Thank you.

Simone, should I continue?

Life – a dream?

Link to topic in video at 7m59s

[Simone:] No, Mikael, there's a question from the chat, and Motsi Mabuse asks: "Is life just a dream?"

[Dhyan Mikael:] Thank you for the question.

Basically, it is a dream. I can't really say anything about it with one hundred percent competence, because I'm still here. I'm not some super big Guru who can see it all clearly from above, but everything I know and experience so far is: yes, it's a dream. Everything we think is important is not important. I just read something about this three days ago.

It's like when you dream at night, and I'm sure you know that from your dreams. You have a dream, and even if the dream is about something quite mundane, there's often this feeling that it's really important that you do it right. And of course you can't. In dreams, you usually know what you should be doing, but something keeps getting in the way and it just doesn't work out.

It's just hair-raising, and then you have the feeling that you're under pressure and that it's really urgent and important. Sometimes you're really stressed in a dream and then you wake up. And everything that was in the dream, all these feelings, this whole situation, this so truly and genuinely felt importance and urgency, it's all gone.

And that's how you can imagine it with the way we are experiencing life right now.

I don't know whether life itself, these bodies, this planet, whether it's all just a dream. I don't know because I'm still here. But everything we take seriously, every problem, every importance, every urgency, that's all a dream. None of that is important. These bodies, life and death, birth, these sensations we have about them, it's all a dream.

And the challenge is to slowly grasp this while we are dreaming.

I often dream that I'm afraid of falling down somewhere. Recently I had a dream like this, where I'm balancing somewhere high up in completely absurd situations and I'm afraid that I will inevitably slip and fall. And I always practice letting go in my dreams, if I succeed in doing so. I am not always the master of the dream.

I try out what happens if I don't believe this serious situation and just let myself slip and fall. And I've already managed to do that in the dream, and that's really, really great. Then I can experience in the dream that all of this is not true, this important, this dangerous thing. And that's how it is here, too.

And the nice thing about the dream we're in right now is that there's a way to find out. That's why I'm talking about Samarpan Meditation. That's what all the saints talk about, that's what Jesus talked about: this way, while we're here, here, in this really felt world, with all these really felt feelings and these really felt problems.

While we are in here, we can begin to wake up.

And with that, all the problems disappear. I said earlier: I'm not sure if the world here and everything is completely unreal. I'm not that far. But I am so far that I know and experience: there are no problems. There is simply no problem. And if I feel a problem, that doesn't mean there really is one. Thank you for the wonderful question.

Simone, how are things at your end?

[Simone:] I have two questions now and I have a lot to read out. Maik writes:

Fear of being alone

Link to topic in video at 13m50s

"Unfortunately I can't be here live as I have to work. My first question has to do with death and dying. That was the title of a seminar I attended as part of my Gestalt therapy training. These four days were very much about the experience of birth and death and the inner confrontation with this topic. To my surprise, I realized that I am not afraid of death. It felt more like a friend and coming home. What triggered a lot, however, was that after the dying process, I was overcome with a very big existential fear that I would now be alone forever.

I had a separation experience as a four-month-old child, when my parents left me alone for longer, and I think something got mixed up with the topic of death and being alone. The feeling in the seminar, the fear of being alone forever, was almost unbearable. Since then, I've been looking for security and want someone to tell me: 'You won't be alone after death. You will feel that there is no separation at all.' And then I ask myself: no one can give me this certainty because no one can know for sure. So, how can I deal with my fear of death and being alone?"

[Dhyan Mikael:] There are people who can tell you with certainty that you are not alone, not now and not after death; me, for example. But that's still of no use to you. The only thing that is of any use to you is what you experience yourself.

The topic you are asking about is not unknown to me. I know it too.

Twenty-four years ago, when I came to my spiritual master Soham, we had a conversation shortly after I arrived there which I still remember. And he said to me: "Mikael, your topic is being alone. You are unable to be alone." And I didn't even know what he was talking about. I wasn't even aware of it, but then I found out that it was so. I couldn't be alone. I was afraid of being alone, just like you, and this controls everything: relationships, friendships, how you behave.

And the advice my master gave me back then was: "Make friends with being alone, with this feeling, with this fear." See, you try to get out of this feeling. You try to get rid of the feeling, for example by finding someone who can reassure you that there is no reason to be afraid of being alone forever.

I invite you to go in the opposite direction, very gently, very leisurely. Instead of running away from the feelings, turn around, invite the feeling in, as if you will be alone forever with absolute certainty, because that's how it feels inside. You have this certainty.

It's not true, but you have this certainty, and you have to somehow make friends with it. And when you do that, when you accept it as it is for you, when you invite it as it is for you and make peace with it, then you will discover the truth. This feeling that you are running away from will reveal the truth to you, I promise you.

How it is for someone else, for me for example or for anyone else, is only of use to me. It's of no use to you at all, no matter what I say. It's the same for me. I have to make peace with every feeling, with every fear, with everything that comes to me, even if I know that there is actually no reason for it.

Don't run away from the feeling. I know the intensity that such a feeling can have very well myself. It feels really existential. I know exactly what you're talking about.

But it's worth making friends with it. This is a rare opportunity you have right now. I encourage you to stay where you are and not run away from it. I am with you.

But you said, Maik has a second question, Simone?

[Simone:] Exactly. I'd be happy to read it out now.

[Dhyan Mikael:] Yes.

The disturbing mind

Link to topic in video at 20m26s

[Simone:] "The second question concerns my meditation practice. Thanks to your impulses, I've been meditating every morning without interruption for six months now and I'm very happy about it. Samarpan Meditation has become a constant in my life. Thank you, Mikael.

My experience in meditation is the oscillation between my mind, which constantly creates problems and wants to solve them at the same time, and then those moments when problems don't exist. Then there is a third voice in which my mind evaluates and devalues what it does, which always scares me. It's like a 'pseudo-good' that evaluates, versus my irreplaceable mind; like a struggle; and then also moments of just being. Will it always be like this?"

[Dhyan Mikael:] Thank you for the beautiful question. Thank you, Maik.

I would like to share a story that Swamiji once told. He told the story of a small seed, a tiny little seed, the seed of a tree. And this seed, at some point it had fallen on the ground and was lying there on the ground between stones and rocks. And then, the seed began to worry because it didn't know how it would ever start to grow, in the situation it found itself in, between all those stones; all around it were just stones and large boulders.

And then this seed asked the tree growing not far from it: "What should I do?" And it said: "Don't worry about it. Everything is fine." And at some point, the seed started to grow a little bit. He still had huge worries. The tree kept comforting and reassuring him, saying: "Everything is fine." And the seed was desperate all the time: "What am I going to do? I can't move these stones, they're so heavy."

But very slowly it grew, then grew around these stones, and then it came to light at the top, and then this little seed became a tiny plant and a little tree. Then the tree got bigger and bigger, grew more and more and more. And the stones didn't change. The stones were still there, and the rocks were all still there. They hadn't changed at all, but the tree grew bigger and bigger, and after a while, it no longer thought about the stones or the rocks at all.

They were down there somewhere and became smaller and smaller and completely unimportant. And it's the same with us. Of course, Swamiji tells this story about this seed because that is us. This seed is the soul within us, and when we start to discover it, and when we start to turn towards it, then we realize... then we see all the stones around us, our mind, the thoughts, our ideas, the world, the distractions. We sit down to meditate, and we have the feeling that we are actually thinking the whole time.

And when you're not thinking, you're thinking about thinking. So, it's completely absurd, I know. And it doesn't change. We have this body and we have this head and it just does it. It's not really a problem, that's what it's made for. It's actually a really great machine. What changes is the power of the soul.

I still have thoughts, just like you. When I sit down to meditate... Yesterday I had a really great meditation. I sat down and right from the start, it was just amazingly quiet. I thought that was great. This morning it was completely different. It's different for me every day. There was so much going on in my head this morning, it was amazing. But because of all this noise, I was even deeper than usual at the end of the meditation. It was really great. I always find it helpful, no matter what.

But the difference between me and you is that I don't take all this fuss at all seriously. It's not a problem for me, on the contrary: it helps me to come to myself even more, as if it were a game. For me, it's no longer serious at all. And that's what changes. The stronger we become within ourselves, the stronger the soul becomes, the bigger it grows, this tree of the soul, the more insignificant are all these disturbances that we initially find simply overwhelming. That's why I keep telling: the only thing we need to do is meditate, and be patient.

And I am this tree growing next to you, growing just like you. I may have been growing for a few days longer than you, and I can tell you: "Don't worry. I can't explain it to you because you're still worried, but I can assure you that everything is going right." In practical terms, this means that you should continue to meditate every day as you do. I think that is fantastic, the straightforwardness with which you have started this is wonderful.

Just keep meditating and don't worry at all about how it is. Just meditate, no matter how it is. Swamiji also says: "Don't judge how your meditation is." You don't know how good it is. You don't know what a fantastic and miraculous effect it has when you meditate for half an hour, despite all these thoughts. You remain seated. You keep coming back to the crown with your attention, despite the thoughts. This is all you have to do. I once made a video about this called: "It's not about the Silence."

It is not at all about experiencing silence for half an hour in meditation. It's about meditating for half an hour and repeatedly directing our attention to where we want it to be, despite all the noise, and this makes us stronger and stronger. We feel completely wrong, we feel weak and helpless, but through this constant practice and through this constant repeated willingness to do it every morning, this inner power of consciousness grows within us.

And it won't be long before you hear yourself telling someone: "Yes, yes, I know that. Just keep going." All you need is patience, but you have it. That's really, really great. I'm glad you're here. Thank you, Maik.

Collective development

Link to topic in video at 29m10s

[Simone:] Mikael, there are two more questions for you. I'll read them out now. "In my experience, when you start to deal with your true being or to sense it, you are suddenly shown content of a completely different kind," writes Franziska. "There is sometimes talk of a new development in human history, a new earth, as Eckart Tolle describes it. Do you also have the feeling that we are currently undergoing a strong collective change and are approaching the Divine again? And do you perhaps see yourself as a little wheel in this development?"

[Dhyan Mikael:] Oh, that's a great question. Thank you, Franziska. Thank you, Franziska. Yes, of course it is. I am a wheel in this. You are a wheel in this. Everyone listening here is a wheel in this.

You know, most people don't realize what we're experiencing right now. That us normal people, who live in society, with jobs, with family, with friends, with other people around us... that we are beginning to awaken... that there are things like Satsang, in the cities, in the world, that's incredible. A few decades ago, this didn't exist at all, it was still something very esoteric.

Now there is someone like Eckart Tolle who sold millions of copies of his books, who fills halls with thousands of people, just normal people who are interested in it. And Samarpan Meditation is the ultimate tool for us people in normal life to awaken here, where we are. And the fact that it is now coming into society is because we are just at the beginning of such a new age.

Samarpan Meditation has been around for many hundreds of years, but until now it has been hidden in the Himalayas; it was developed and preserved by Gurus who have lived there for many hundreds of years, and one Guru has always passed it on to the next disciple. But the time was not ripe for such a tool to come into society simply because society was not ready for it. The time wasn't ready for it.

When I was a teenager, when I was thirteen years old, my mother had met a spiritual Master and from then on had a spiritual Master. And that was something totally esoteric back then. That was almost fifty years ago now.

Today it's normal. Today there are ashrams from saints in every major city. I spent twenty years with my Master Soham in Satsang, and quite normal people came there; they came there from work in the evening with their briefcase, in their suit, sat down in the Satsang and listened every evening. That was unimaginable a few decades ago. And I'm telling you this because I want to illustrate what we are experiencing here.

And this is how the new society will emerge; not through a revolution, not through heavenly armies suddenly falling from the sky and overcoming evil or waging wars, but quite simply through you beginning to discover yourself.... through you beginnng to awaken; by you beginning to strengthen your consciousness, becoming enlightened and living in normal life as a realized human being. And this inner light of yours is contagious.

It's not at all about convincing or improving other people, but every person who starts to become more conscious influences everything around them, and in this way, the entire world will change, inevitably. It's like an avalanche, and we're just at the beginning of that avalanche. It's a very, very exciting, thrilling and blessed time that we're experiencing.

Also, that I can make videos like this... and that people are watching them, on YouTube, everywhere... I find that incredibly amazing. So, we're living in a wonderful, very blessed time.

Thank you.

Raising children properly

Link to topic in video at 35m11s

[Simone:] I'm going to read out another question from Sandra.

[Dhyan Mikael:] Yes, with pleasure. Hello Sandra.

[Simone:] "How can we bring up children properly? What is important when living together with children? What can we give them and what do they really need? What do children not need?"

[Dhyan Mikael:] Wow, thank you.

Children are the most important thing in this world because children are the people... children are the world of tomorrow, and what we give children today determines the world of tomorrow. That's why I'm happy about this question.

You can give your child attention when they are small enough and want it. Children need an incredible amount of attention and time. Children don't need much in particular. We always think about what do I need to teach them? What do they need to know? What do I need to give them? You don't need to know anything about it, the children already know that themselves, but they need your vicinity, your permanent, reliable, constant vicinity: that you are always there when they need you; that they are the most important thing for you.

I experience that here. I live with my wife and her children, and of course the mother is busy, has all sorts of plans and things to do. But when one of the children comes and needs something, it's simply always the most important thing for her. And somehow, she manages it. I'm always amazed. Then these children get the feeling: "Everything is fine. If I need anything, mummy is there."

It's not so important that you always have everything under control and that you can always say the right thing to the children and that you can always give them what they might need or want. That's not the point. Just being there, that's the most important thing.

And we live in really strange times. The adults... We supposedly live in times where everything is better than it used to be, but I have the feeling that people are working more today than they used to, and they are more stressed, and we are passing this on to the children more and more. Now it's already normal that children are stressed at school, and now it's already starting to get stressful in kindergarten because they have to learn something earlier and earlier.

Children simply need time; time and attention.

That's one thing. You asked what you can give them, apart from attention. The most important thing is that children don't learn by what you give them. Children don't learn by what you tell them or don't tell them. You ask: "What do children not need?" Children don't need advice. Children don't need anyone to tell them what is right and what is wrong. Children choose what they learn themselves, and they do it very cleverly: they imitate you. No matter what you tell them, no matter how cleverly you talk, it's of no use. They learn nothing from what you say.

They imitate you. And if you know that, then you know what your job is. If you want your children to be happy, show them how to do it: be happy yourself. That means: learn to take care of yourself. Be a role model, but a really good role model, not a role model of how to hold a fork and knife properly at the table; no: how to be in life. Show them how to be happy; how to be at peace; how to love yourself; how to know that everything is good. If you want your child to experience this, then you have to experience it yourself. That is the challenge.

If you learn to love yourself and if you learn to dare to take care of yourself in a world that constantly demands the opposite, then you are a great role model for your children. And you don't need to talk about it at all. Simply by living it, they will learn it from you.

I mentioned my mom earlier, who had a spiritual Master when I was thirteen.

My mother was no wiser or smarter than anyone else. She also did all sorts of things wrong. She did all sorts of hair-raising things too, as all parents do, but she began to look after herself at a time when that was unthinkable. And look what happened to me. She didn't explain anything to me. She didn't tell me anything about it. We never talked about how to live and how it should all work. Conversations like that are pointless.

But without me knowing it, I was shown how to do it, and that's why I had it so much easier than my mother. And look how nice I have it now. Unbelievable. So, it's basically easy and hard at the same time. It's easy because the only thing you have to do is look after yourself. The better you do that, the more blessed your children will be. And it's hard because it's not that easy for us to learn to take care of ourselves. But that's the direction.

Thank you for that beautiful question. Thank you. I love these questions where it's about parents and children. Thank you.

Your own light illuminates the world

Link to topic in video at 43m04s

[Simone:] Mikael, Franziska has one more comment.

[Dhyan Mikael:] Yes, please.

[Simone:] "Thank you Mikael. I find the idea of your own light radiating outwards incredibly beautiful. Being a kind of secret light bringer, I like that."

[Dhyan Mikael:] Yes, and you know, it's so... The great thing is... I talk about it in a lot of my videos, how life, your own life, changes miraculously when you start to turn inwards, or, as Jesus says, put God first. And what happens then, to put it metaphorically... to stay with this metaphor of light... Swamiji often says: "Ignite your own light." He speaks of this inner light. And then, there is light all around you.

Your light illuminates your little world, and your life is completely different than before. You can't explain it to yourself, because all you do is go more and more inwards, and all around you it gets brighter and brighter. And this light that transforms your life in a miraculous way, the same light attracts others and inspires others. And when enough people do this, the whole world is bright. That's how it works.

World's grief

Link to topic in video at 44m54s

[Simone:] There is one more question from Claudia that I would like to read out.

[Dhyan Mikael:] Yes. Hello Claudia.

[Simone:] "How do we resolve, regenerate the grief of this world within us?"

[Dhyan Mikael:] Don't worry about the world's grief at all. It's like this: God distributes tasks. Everyone is given a task, and if everyone takes care of their task, then the world will be healed. And you can tell what your task is by what happens to you. You don't have to worry about the world at all and see who is carrying grief and help them.

Carry your own burden, your feelings, your fears, your worries, as willingly as you can. Say 'yes' to them, transform them, love them. Explore them. Each of us has enough to do. It's so much easier to take care of the world's grief: it's far away.

That's why all people do it. People always want to take care of others and the world, but firstly it doesn't work, and secondly, it's an excuse. But the few things that are waiting for us inside of us: that is our true task, very simple, very close, very unspectacular.

This amazing challenge: when you meditate... you sit down in the morning, you have nothing to do, nothing to do for half an hour. The time is reserved. There is nothing to do. You sit down. And what do you feel for half an hour? Urgency, worry, importance, the world, feelings, anger, sadness, pain. We are sitting on a volcano, so to speak, and this is our homework. God, life, has given each and every one of us enough to do for this entire life. The only thing we have to do is dare to take care of our own task.

It's not about helping someone else at all. That is a misunderstanding.

In Christianity, and most of us probably grew up as a Christian, at least in the Christian culture, we often talk about "loving our neighbor". And empathy is a huge misunderstanding. It's like this: the disciples experience the Master, the disciples experience Jesus, for example, or the disciples experience their Guru, and they experience an incredible love that flows from a Jesus or a Guru. And they feel as if this Jesus simply loves them incredibly and will do anything for them.

And the students, the disciples, have no idea what the Master, the Guru or what Jesus actually does. They don't understand anything of what he says, and then, they just imitate him. Then they try to practice empathy themselves, or not to eat meat, because they see that the Guru doesn't eat meat and so on. They imitate all these outward appearances, everything that is visible from the outside. And that doesn't help; on the contrary: it takes them even further away from themselves.

And that is also quite understandable, because a Jesus or a Guru, a Master, did not get there by trying to help others. Such a person is one of those very few, very rare specimens that are called "black sheep", which is why Jesus also liked to talk about black sheep who set out on their own path to themselves, something that is completely reprehensible and selfish in the eyes of all other people. And on this path to themselves, they have found fulfillment, strength and love within themselves. They have discovered the one source of love, the one source of peace.

And the more they discovered it, the fuller they became, the fuller they became with love and peace. And then, they become so full because they have turned inwards, because they have become a black sheep... then they became so full that at some point, this love and peace started to overflow. They still didn't do anything else. A Guru, a Jesus, doesn't run around the neighborhood to help others. He doesn't do anything. He is only ever closer to himself, and this overflow takes place even more. And that's what other people then experience.

But the source is within yourself, and you can only find it if you go inwards. That's what it's all about; that's why we are here. And then you too will become someone of whom others say: "Wow, he has such empathy", and then you won't understand at all what people are talking about, that's how I feel, because the only thing you do is: you rest within yourself, and you look ever deeper into yourself.

You don't care about others, but others drink from you and benefit from you and flourish around you. That's how it works, and that's why the only thing you need to do is to take care of the little bit of grief you find in yourself, to embrace it. That is the only task you have. And you have the permission and the duty to just take care of it. Then, you're doing it right, even if that means being a black sheep in the eyes of others.

Thank you.

Black sheep

Link to topic in video at 53m01s

[Simone:] Mikael, there are currently no questions in the chat.

[Dhyan Mikael:] Thank you. I would like to say something briefly about black sheep, because the topic is so close to my heart. I am one myself.

There's this story, I've already told it in a video, it's told somewhere in the Bible, and the story is about a shepherd. And this shepherd has a hundred sheep, and one day, one of the sheep gets lost, goes its own way, gets lost, goes the wrong way, so to speak; and it is the biggest and strongest.

It is always the big, strong sheep that become the black sheep. And then, something interesting happens. The shepherd leaves the ninety-nine sheep behind and looks for the one, and when the shepherd finds the one somewhere in the wilderness, he takes it in his arms and says: "I love you more than the ninety-nine."

And this story is in the Bible because the shepherd is God, the sheep are the people. The people want to do everything right. They take care of each other, and we've been doing that for millennia, and the world is getting darker and darker. But every now and then, one gets lost.

Every now and then, one dares... very rare specimens, the strong ones, the great ones, a Buddha, a Jesus, a Lao-Tse Tung, they do the unheard-of: they look after themselves; they go on a path that no one else goes on, that everyone believes is wrong. Only God says: "Ah, there's one, at last!" And he follows him, he lifts him up, he loves him more than anyone else. That's why this story is in the Bible.

True and false self

Link to topic in video at 55m43s

Simone, would you like me to read something to you?

[Simone:] Yes, please, Mikael.

[Dhyan Mikael:] Then I'll read out a question that has also reached me by email. "I always enjoy watching your videos and listening to your experiences and advice. You repeatedly advise: 'Be true to yourself'. I often ask myself: how do you distinguish the true self from a false self? Most of what we humans do and above all think and then use as a basis for decision-making comes from the ego and unfortunately not from the soul.

Sometimes, I react out of impulse or compulsion in everyday life, with which I am not one hundred percent in harmony afterwards. I then have the impression that my actions and the underlying thinking were perhaps not necessarily in true harmony with my soul. Sohamji would probably say: 'Don't worry about it and meditate'."

Yes, that's a really, really good question. We had a similar question at the beginning of this Satsang. The thing is: we can never be sure; never. You will never know whether what you are feeling as a compass within you, this energy that is guiding you, whether it is your ego or your soul. You won't know, but you will find out.

If it was your ego, you will find out. You will feel it later. And if it was your soul, if it was true, then you will find out too. And that's how we learn.

So, my advice is not to worry about it at all: "Is that my soul or my ego that I'm sensing?" You can't answer that question. I do it like this: what I feel, for instance what I feel as guidance within me, where the energy is going for me, where my curiosity is leading me or my joy, I just do that, no matter what I think about it, even if it feels completely wrong. I know I can't judge whether it's holy or sinful, wrong or right. Whether it's the soul or the ego, I can't know. But I will find out.

And by living like this, every day, again and again, again and again, this feeling of right and wrong continues to develop. But it's not that you then have the feeling more and more: "Oh, now I'm sure of my decision." That's what I said at the beginning of the Satsang: you actually feel permanently ignorant and unsure, but nevertheless, your own instinct, the feeling that guides you, becomes more and more sure, better and better, clearer and clearer.

Later on, you find out more and more often: that was really good; more and more often, more and more often. You don't feel any clearer or more enlightened in the situation, but what happens out of this ignorant trust in your own compass, from this ignorant trust in the energy... we can't do anything other than follow it, we can't do anything else anyway... And by following it more and more often, more and more often, we go more and more in the right direction, even though we don't necessarily feel more sure or wiser or smarter. That's how I feel.

I often say in my videos: "I'm just stupid, I have no idea, I feel really really stupid." And then sometimes people say: "But Mikael, that's not true at all", but I feel like that. And it doesn't go away, the feeling doesn't go away. But that what happens is getting wiser and wiser and more and more right. It's quite amazing. So, you're right, I would also say: "Don't worry about it, meditate, and always do what you feel like doing. That's the only thing you can do." That doesn't mean it's always right, but you will always learn the right thing. Always.

I think that's such a great subject: being true to yourself, no matter how stupid you are, no matter how weird you feel; that's the only thing you have to do, in reality. All the rest happens by itself. Thank you.

Simone?

[Simone:] We don't have any new questions yet, but Katharina has just written: "What a great story", about the shepherd story.

[Dhyan Mikael:] Yes, that's one of my favorite stories because I'm a black sheep. And you too, of course, when you're in this Satsang, you're a black sheep. That's just the way it is. And that's what the Bible says. It says: these are the right ones. Yes, then I can read out another question. That's great, because I have a few here.

Falling asleep during meditation

Link to topic in video at 1h02m01s

"I've been doing Samarpan Meditation for about two weeks now, and although I sit upright, I always fall asleep briefly in between. Is that detrimental to the effect?"

Oh, that's a lovely question. Thank you.

That's a really good sign.

It's like... I recently attended a live discourse by my Guru Swamiji here in Germany in fall. And he has such an energy, it's unimaginable.

And between Swamiji and the people... there were about three hundred, four hundred people there... there was a relatively large distance, sixty, seventy meters or so. It was out in the open. And he has such energy, this Guru... it's incredible. You're literally transported somewhere else, without realizing it. And some people fell asleep because of this effect, this energy, it's so relaxing, it's so calming. There is simply no reason to stay awake at all.

And one of these people was snoring so loud that you could hear it everywhere out there on this soccer field, it was just fantastic. And I've seen it again and again with Soham in Satsang that people just fell asleep. They often called Soham "Swami Valium" in the past because people simply fell asleep in his Satsang, and that is simply because you experience such deep relaxation. You sit there in Satsang with this Master, and all your problems disappear, and you can finally relax. And people fall asleep like babies.

And that's also sometimes the case during meditation. You get into this energy that carries you, and you're just happy, and then you just relax more and more. And you can't judge whether you are really sleeping or whether you are experiencing what is called meditation.

You just know that something is wrong here: fifteen minutes are missing... but you don't really know what you've been doing. So, it's definitely not a bad sign, on the contrary. It's a really good sign.

As long as you're sitting upright, it's definitely a good sign. Swamiji also recommends that you meditate sitting upright, preferably with a free back, and that is simply the best, the most comfortable. The energy is different when you are lying down, then you really fall asleep. I wouldn't necessarily recommend that.

And I would like to say something else that Swamiji says about meditation. He says: "No matter how you meditate, meditate somehow." I just said that it's best to meditate with your back upright, but don't make a problem out of it. There are many people who simply can't do that, their bodies can't cope with it. It doesn't matter at all. Just meditate in the way that works for you. Don't make a problem out of all these little things around it. As long as you meditate, it's wonderful.

For example, Swamiji also says that it is best and most beautiful to meditate very early in the morning, immediately after waking up. There are people who just can't do it, and then Swamiji says: "Never mind. And if you meditate in the afternoon at five or in the evening at nine... the main thing is that you meditate; that's the most important thing. The rest is all little things, all unimportant." Falling asleep? Unimportant; the main thing is that you meditate.

What do narcissists need?

Link to topic in video at 1h06m41s

[Simone:] Mikael, now there's a question I'd like to read out.

[Dhyan Mikael:] Yes, I'd love you to.

[Simone:] Sandra asks: "What is a narcissist in the eyes of innocence? What has happened to him, that he has become so unloving? What do narcissists really need in order to heal?"

[Dhyan Mikael:] In the eyes of innocence, there are no narcissists.

In the eyes of innocence, there are only little children everywhere, full of pain, who are not responsible for what they carry around with them, without exception.

What does a narcissist need? People who take care of themselves, that's what a narcissist needs, because then he or she is forced to take care of him- or herself, and then all is well.

Don't take care of the narcissist.

Take care of yourself.

Jesus once said something quite interesting. He said: "Don't take the splinter out of your neighbor's eye, take the log out of your own eye." And he was talking about that.

It is easy to think about other people.

The shortcomings, the weaknesses, the wounds, the bad things about other people are so obvious, and especially with narcissists. They are really poor people, because it is so obvious with them.

But recognizing our own logs and turning towards them is a real challenge. And if you do that, then other people won't have the opportunity to harass, bother or manipulate you. There are people who are very good at manipulating other people, some narcissists are among them. However, this only works as long as other people are not at peace with themselves. If someone is at peace with themselves, a narcissist has no chance.

So, every day I experience aspects of myself where I think: "For God's sake.

Why do I have to be like this?" But that's just the way I am.

And the more you get to know yourself, the closer you get to yourself, and that's why I said at the very beginning of my answer to you that there are no narcissists for innocence... The closer you get to yourself, the busier you are, and you no longer look at others. And when you look at others and see something there, you have nothing but compassion, because everything you see out there, you also know about yourself. You may not live it out like others do.

It may not be as pronounced in your case, but mostly not because we are better, but simply because we don't dare or because we somehow have other inhibitions, otherwise we would behave just like the people we like to judge so much. And the more you start to love yourself and get to know yourself and make peace with all these weirdnesses and strange characteristics that you discover in yourself, the less willing you are to judge other people in any way, because you can see more and more clearly: they are all like me.

They can do just as little about it as I can, just as much a product of their environment, just as helpless as I am, just as ignorant as I am. And that's why there are no such people for innocence; only children, only small children.

And, of course, we are confronted with people in everyday life who sometimes make our lives very difficult, but the best thing to do is to look after yourself. As soon as you ask yourself the question... This is especially true of narcissists, who are very good at it. They want you to ask yourself the question: what does this poor guy want, what's wrong with him? How can you help him? Then you've already fallen for it. Take care of yourself, it's the best thing for everyone involved.

And besides, you know... There is no such thing as a narcissist. We love to use such labels these days, such terms. But we humans are very complex, incredibly multi-layered creatures, and we have a bit of everything.

Osho, the Indian mystic who was very well known in the 1970s and 1980s, said: "I am God, and I am Devil." He knew himself; he was very, very close to himself, and he knew all these sides of himself. He had everything. He knew that this is an illusion, that we label certain people as evil and good or as narcissists or depressed or something or other.

We have it all somehow. With some people it's more visible, with some people it's more uncontrolled, and that's why it comes to the surface. In other people it's just as present, but not as visible. The differences are actually only of a gradual nature. There is no one who is not narcissistic, and there is no one who is only narcissistic.

And that's why I prefer to take care of the log in my eye, and that's how I learned to love all other people, because then, the splinters in the eyes of others are peanuts. It's no longer a big deal.

Thank you for the question.

[Simone:] Mikael, we don't have a new question, but Snow White says: "You radiate such warmth, it's so good."

[Dhyan Mikael:] That's because I've been learning from my Master for twenty-four years: "Take care of yourself. Be true to yourself." That's what I said earlier about Jesus. That's how it comes. So, I will now read out another question from my side.

Not being welcome

Link to topic in video at 1h15m58s

"I am temporarily living with my parents in their house again, without having set a time frame beforehand. At first, they agreed, but in the meantime, there have been a few incidents that have made me feel that I'm not really welcome here. Now I have the prospect of an apartment, but it doesn't feel really right. My parents are pressuring me and manipulating me.

They think this apartment is just right for me. I can't perceive any loving intention in their behavior, more like pushing me away. Inwardly, I have already decided against the apartment. Somehow, I can't find a suitable place for me to live. It's frustrating and plunges me into sad hopelessness. Do you have any suggestions for me?"

Yes, thank you. I really love these practical questions.

I want to say two things about it. One is: let's talk about the obvious. It is very obvious that your parents don't want you to live there. You can say that in a completely neutral way. It has nothing to do with whether they love you or not.

Okay. And if you have the courage to simply acknowledge that: "Okay, it's obvious that this isn't a good fit. It was okay for a few weeks or maybe a few months, and now it's not." And once you acknowledge that, just, you know, without the story, without the story: "Ah, I'm the daughter, and these are my parents and they should love me, and I should be welcome here."

Maybe it's true, maybe it's not, but we don't need to discuss that. Let's just look at the situation as it is, apart from the feelings that naturally play a role; I understand that. Okay. It's becoming obvious: that is no longer your place; and once you know that, you can take care of yourself accordingly.

As soon as you give up the expectation that where you are now, that you should be welcome there... as soon as you do that and accept how it really is right now, then you will get clarity, and only then will you also find something new. At the moment, you're tripping yourself up. You don't really want to see the situation as it is because it's painful; because there are emotional stories attached to it; because it's not just any people, but because it's your parents and you've experienced a lot with them, and there's a lot of emotion involved.

And all the feelings are okay, you can feel them all if you have the opportunity, but when it comes to the practical situation, just be as brutally honest with yourself as you can. "Okay, I was welcome here, but now I'm not anymore. What can I do?" Once you see that clearly, you'll have completely different ideas.

I can tell you what I would do in such a situation, but I'm not sure if that will help you. What I just said at the beginning is what's really important.

For me, it's unbearable to be with someone where I feel it's not good for them if I'm there. I have to leave then. It's not good for me either. I can only be somewhere where I am really welcome. As soon as I feel: "I'm no longer welcome here", no matter what I think about it, no matter whether I think: "Yes, but I should be welcome"... But none of that matters.

As soon as I realize, I'm not welcome here, then I have to leave. Otherwise, I'll get sick; otherwise, I'll go crazy. That's not good for anyone. That's me. And once you feel that so clearly, then you find something, because then you're not looking for a permanent place to stay that's really good for you, a dream apartment so to speak, but then it's about: "I have to get out of here, and then I'll see."

Maybe you just move on to a friend's place, since you don't have any other parents. But maybe you will find something else. But as soon as you realize what the current challenge is right now, then the next step will be easier. At the moment, it's obviously not about finding a new, perfect, permanent home. You'll find it somehow, but it's more like this: "I can't stay here. Something has to happen."

Somehow that reminds me of something I experienced in my own life. I didn't experience it with the apartment, but with a job, but back then I read advice from a saint... I don't even remember who it was, and later Soham said exactly the same thing in Satsang, I just remember it now. He said: "You have to give up the old before the new can come." But we always want to have the new firmly and securely in our hands before we let go of the old, and that's not what usually happens in life. That's what happened to me with a job.

I had a sure-fire job that I could have done for the rest of my life, forever, but I couldn't do it anymore. I had to get out. I would have died there. And I had to give up everything, everything. I didn't know what to do at all. I didn't know where to go. I didn't know what money I was supposed to live on. I didn't know anything. I had to give it all up, and after I gave that up and stood there naked... I had nothing, on the contrary: I even had to pay a lot of money to be allowed out of there. I had nothing.

Two weeks later, I had the job of my life, which I then did for twenty years with such joy. I could never have imagined that. I could never have imagined it. I first had to let go of the old and then, out of nowhere, a whole new life came along. So, my advice to you is: really do it step by step. Look: "Okay, how is it specifically now? Is it now time to find a really nice apartment for myself with a lot of patience and consideration, or am I just on the run?"

You have to feel for yourself what is right, I can't do that for you. I can only tell you a little bit about what I've experienced in my life.

But in the situation you're in now, separate the story, the feelings, this "ah, but my parents should...", or this being hurt and feeling rejected... These are all feelings that have nothing to do with the specific situation. They only become so painful for you in this situation, but they are old, they didn't arise today, and you can still feel them tomorrow or in two years' time.

Look at yourself naked: "Do I want to stay here? Do I feel comfortable here? Is it good for me? Can I breathe here?" And then decide.

Thank you for your question. Thank you, thank you.

[Simone:] Mikael, we have no more questions in the chat. Do you perhaps have a quick final question? It's 21:26 o'clock.

[Dhyan Mikael:] Yes, we have three minutes left, let's see if I can find a question... I always tend to talk so much...

Dealing with memories

Link to topic in video at 1h26m18s

I have another question. I don't want to read it out now, it would take too long, but it's about death. A few Satsangs ago we had two people... one person, a woman, talked about the death of her partner. Another woman reported the death of her dog, and she has now written to me again here and said... how does she put it? "You say that one shouldn't go down memory lane, but one can't avoid it.

Memories come to me without being asked. But you probably mean that one shouldn't indulge in them." Of course, when something emotionally upsetting happens, such as the death of a beloved animal that has been with you for years, it's completely normal for memories to keep coming back, and it requires incredible discipline not to pursue them. Because it leads to nothing.

And if you persist in turning away from the memories, you can get back to the moment... and if you have to pinch yourself for it and then feel your hand that you are pinching right now... or feel how you are sitting on the chair, or feel your breath... then you will realize that yes, you have feelings inside you, you can feel them. You feel sadness, perhaps an emptiness inside you. But the suffering, that is in the memories. The feelings are simply human feelings; actually, they are all full of love.

But when we go into the memories, we go away from here. We go away from ourselves, as if we were flying away, and then we suffer. And sometimes, it feels like if you don't look at the memories, if you turn away from them, as if you're turning away from your loved one or your beloved animal, your beloved partner, but that's not true.

That is the mind disguising itself. You will feel a completely different, pure, crystal-clear and, above all, suffering-free love if you stubbornly ignore these memories for a while and just be here, completely still. You will feel a connection that has nothing to do with images, nothing to do with memories, a living connection full of love.

Well, how did I manage that? To the second. I really have to be careful not to go overtime. I love talking about these beautiful questions. Thank you so much for this wonderful evening. Thank you for being here. Thank you for the questions. I am so grateful that I get to do this. And thank you to Devasetu and Jetzt-TV for making this possible so wonderfully. And thank you, Simone, for your beautiful reading. Good evening. Good night.