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A Life without Questions

About the nature of the spiritual path.

About this Video:

I love the simple, practical questions about life – simply because if you take a closer look, you discover the secret of life and happiness in them.

This was also the case with the questions in this video: "Is it counterproductive if I give space to my lust when I am on the spiritual path? Should I help others or look after myself instead?"

Basically, it's always about the same thing: how do I know what's right now? What can be a compass that shows me the way so that I can decide and do the right thing and feel good and happy afterwards? How can I become wise and finally know how to do it?

The answer to these questions is surprising, because wisdom is so different from what we imagine it to be. Although it deals with seemingly mundane questions, this video takes you into the depths of life and back to paradise and the creation of hell.

Links to the topics in this video:

(please find the complete transcript below)

  1. We can live without seriousness

  2. Is it counterproductive to give space to lust?

  3. How the spiritual path works

  4. "I should be different" is the hindrance

  5. Our ideas about what is unspiritual

  6. Do I help out of joy or obligation?

  7. It is not about doing the right thing

  8. Learning happens out of experiencing

  9. Living every moment without judging it

  10. Life functions in a way which is hidden from us

  11. How I make a decision

  12. When the ego gets starved

  13. The direction back into paradise

  14. When you can't say anything

  15. That's how I live

  16. Why only the Pure and Innocent can enter Heaven

Complete text for reading along:

Good morning.

This morning, I feel particularly cheerful and light. I had my meditation this morning, and during the meditation, I remembered a feeling I get when... you know, Jesus said: "Be like the children."

We can live without seriousness

This unseriousness of children... children know no seriousness. And I remembered this. Somehow, it came to me. We have the tendency, especially when it comes to spirituality, especially when it comes to meditating... we take it very seriously. We want to do it right, and we think it's important.

But then we are serious, and we can't meditate. And when I remembered this this morning during meditation, it made me so empty and so... It made it so easy to meditate. I love it.

We can live without seriousness; without taking everything so important.

We can live without seriousness; without taking everything so important.

And I have a few questions which I would like to answer during this video this morning, and in a way, these questions are exactly about this what I just mentioned – about this "taking everything so serious" and wanting to know: "Am I doing it right?" Let's start with the first question.

This first question is about sexuality. And sexuality... I just said: in spirituality and when it comes to meditating, we tend to be particularly serious. But this is also true for sexuality, for anything connected with sex. We take it very, very serious. We think, it's important that we have sex, and it's important that we have nice sex.

Or we think it's important that we don't have sex, and we shouldn't want sex when we are on a spiritual path. So, it's either way, but in any way: we take it seriously. So, this first question, this first email I'm going to read out now, is about this subject of sexuality.

Is it counterproductive to give space to lust?

"Beloved Mikael, I have been meditating for several years. This has had an effect on my sexual behavior. When having sex or when masturbating, I focus on the moment and experience the energy in the body, and, if possible, with my attention on the crown chakra. The pain I used to feel afterwards when I indulged in fantasies is no longer there. At the same time, I still feel the need to ejaculate at least once a week. But it's not that I say: 'I'm aware of the forces, but I no longer follow the belief that I have to come.

I know that I don't need it.' No. It's not like this. I do want ejaculation and satisfaction, which is also good for me afterwards if I have brought it about mindfully. Nevertheless, through meditation, I'm taking the path to dissolve my identification with the body. If I really want this from the bottom of my heart, do you think it is counterproductive if I want to give space to my physical needs and my lust at the same time?"

Thank you for this question. This is such a lovely question.

Yes, this is what we believe. We believe it's counterproductive: "Sexuality is a hindrance on the spiritual path if we give this a space." And this is not your belief. This is a very old belief. Throughout the ages, the monks believed this. They practiced this.

They went to a monastery to be away from all the women in society, so they wouldn't get tempted; so they wouldn't get sexual thoughts, and so they wouldn't get distracted from their spiritual path. They believed: this is good. And Swamiji, my Indian Guru, he says the same thing about the Gurus in India. The Gurus... they go to the Himalayas, far away from everybody, and they say they do this to escape this – the temptation to feel lust, to feel sexual.

So, the question is: is this counterproductive? What options do you have? You feel lust. You want ejaculation. You enjoy the satisfaction this gives you. Do you have a choice? Can you be different? No, of course not. But you can think that you should be different. You can think: "I shouldn't give this a space." And this is a nice thought. It feels very holy. It feels right. And that's what all the monks felt: they couldn't get rid of their lust, but at least they thought that they don't want it, and that felt good.

Do you have a choice? Can you be different?

No, of course not.

But you can think that you should be different.

But it doesn't work.

It doesn't work to think that you should be different. The monks tried it, and you see the result. You can't get rid of sexuality by ignoring it. You can't get rid of sexuality by not giving it space. It's there. Sexuality takes its space. Whether you like it or not: it is there.

And you can see it with the monks: they tried to ignore sexuality, and it didn't lead to anything good. They torture themselves, these poor men. They feel wrong about it. They punish themselves for feeling lust, and all the time, this only makes it stronger. They want it; they believe they shouldn't want it; and it gets more and more difficult.

And it leads to nothing good. If this is being repressed, it will come out somewhere. Swamiji, my Indian Guru, speaks about this too. He says: when you suppress sexuality, it doesn't work. It will break its way in an ugly way, sooner or later.

He gives the example of some ascetic... all his life, he tried to only think about God, to only meditate, ignoring all the sexual thoughts, repressing all the sexual energy. And then, as an old man, such an ascetic, such a 'holy man', then rapes a young girl. That's the story. That's the example Swamiji gives, a very drastic example. This is to show that this does not work – for nobody.

How the spiritual path works

So, what can you do? What works? That's the question. I like it practical.

The question is... You ask: "Is it counterproductive when you are on the spiritual path to give space to your lust?"

What is the spiritual path? What is this? Where do we go?

When we talk about the spiritual path, we talk about discovering the path to the inside: discovering your soul – that what you truly are. And you discover this path when you are here, in the moment. This path is not a physical path, like a road or walkway out there in the world.

When you want to walk a certain road, you have to go where the road is, and then, you follow this road. The spiritual path is different. It's a completely different way. That path opens up when you are here. And this means: when you are the way you are. When you are there where you are now, that's where this path opens up.

When you think you should be different, then you are somewhere else; then you are with your thoughts elsewhere; then you're not on the spiritual path. Then you are in your fantasy. You're not in a sexual fantasy, but in a spiritual fantasy; in this fantasy of: "Oh, that's how I should be."

The spiritual path is different. It's a completely different way.

That path opens up when you are here.
And this means:
when you are
the way you are.

When you want to be on the spiritual path in this moment, you have to come here. You have to forget the thoughts about wanting to be somewhere else – a different location. You have to forget the thoughts about wanting to be different – a different person.

When you forget this, when you're just the way you are, and when you're just where you are right now, that's where this path opens. Then, you're on the spiritual path – for that moment.

"I should be different" is the hindrance

</topic> So, the trick is not to become a certain way, to then become able to walk this path, to become holy enough for Heaven, so to speak.... No. The trick is to not want to be different, but to be the way you are right now. That's when this door opens. So, the obstacle, the hindrance, is not the lust for ejaculation, for instance. The hindrance is the thought: "I should be different." Then you are somewhere else.

When you are at home, you feel this lust and you experience this lust as it is – whether you do something with it or not does not matter at all – then you're here. And then, you think: "Oh, this shouldn't be like this. I should be above this. I should be beyond this." And then, you are with how this feels, this shitty feeling of being wrong. Then you are with this – and then, you are here. Then, there's no hindrance. But as soon as you think: "Oh, I should be different. I shouldn't give the space. I shouldn't feel like this", then you are somewhere else.

What's counterproductive is the thinking about it.

If you can enjoy your lust without thinking about it at all, then it's completely innocent. You experience it, and then you enjoy it, or you don't enjoy it, and then that's it. Then it's done. But when you think about it, you either don't do it, and then, you think about it all the time.

And all the time, you think: "Oh, but I mustn't do it. I'm spiritual." Or you do it, and you don't enjoy it while you're doing it because you think: "Oh, I shouldn't do it." And later on, you think: "Oh, I did something wrong." And in 2 weeks, you still think: "Oh, I should not have done it. How stupid am I? When will I ever learn it?"

And that's counterproductive.

So, my advice to you is: be the way you are right now. Don't worry at all about being spiritual. We have these subtle ideas how we should be in order to walk on this spiritual path, but all these ideas we have are wrong. They are not true.

My advice to you is:
be the way you are right now.

Don't worry at all about being spiritual.

You know, what kills the identification with the body is experiencing how it is – again and again and again. If you... I promise you: if you experience masturbating and if you experience sex with complete awareness and without thinking about it, without thinking about it that it's wrong or important... when you do this, it will lose its importance for you very quickly. Maybe you still masturbate, but it doesn't matter to you.

Maybe you enjoy it, maybe not, but it's not good, and it's not bad. It just is the way it is. It becomes some part of life, just like eating, just like sleeping. You don't think: "Oh, I shouldn't eat. This is a hindrance on my path." No. You don't think this. But with sex, you think this. And the reason why we think this is because it occupies our thinking so much. That's the counterproductivity. That's the obstacle.

So, just stop thinking about it. Then, there's no counterproductivity. Just allow yourself to be the way you are.

And then, you experience masturbating, you experience sex, and maybe you enjoy it, maybe it's beautiful. And then: be with this, enjoy this. Or maybe you experienced: "Okay, that's nice, but I didn't really like it"... then, be with this. That's also okay. It doesn't mean that you should have done it differently. Just be with how it is, every part of the way. Before, you feel lust, then you do it, you have sex or you masturbate, be with this. Then afterwards, how do you feel? Sometimes you feel good.

Sometimes you feel bad. Sometimes you feel indifferent. Be with this. Don't think about what it means. Just be with it. That's when the door opens to the inside: when you just are with what is. And you know, you can be here, you can be in your crown chakra... that's the spot here on the top of the head where we have our attention during the Samarpan Meditation... you know that you can do all these things while you are resting with your attention inside of yourself, in your crown chakra.

Don't think about what it means. Just be with it.

That's when the door opens to the inside:
when you just are with what is.

And that's the only important thing: to experience it while being as aware as you can be. And this means: without thinking; without questioning it.

That's the only important thing:
to experience it while being as aware as you can be.

And this means:
without thinking;
without questioning it.

And then, whether you remain a lustful person or not is not important. For me, it is like this: I find sex and masturbating increasingly unimportant. I mean, this is not the right way to say it... It is completely unimportant for me. I don't care whether it happens or not. It doesn't mean that this body doesn't feel lust.

Sometimes this body feels lust. It doesn't mean that I don't get sexual thoughts or sexual fantasies – I do –, but I don't take it at all serious. I don't think it means something. I don't think it means that I'm a bad person or an unspiritual one, or that I should have sex or that I shouldn't have sex.

I don't take these thoughts serious. And that's why the subject the thoughts are about, in this case sexuality, is no problem for me. It just is the way it is.

My attention is somewhere else. My attention is here, in my inside, here, in the moment.

Our ideas about what is unspiritual

I know the challenge you face. As I said in the beginning: we have a lot of opinions about what is spiritual and what's not, and laying in bed, masturbating and ejaculating does not fit with these ideas we have. We think this is not spiritual.

Thinking about it is not spiritual. Judging what happens, this is not spiritual. Wondering: "Should I have done it? Should I have not done it?", that's not spiritual.

If you just are with what is without judging it, without having an opinion about it, as if this is not your body, as if this is not your lust and not your ejaculation, then, then it's very spiritual.

That's why Jesus said: be like children. That's what he meant. Look how children do it. They do whatever they do. They don't wonder: "Is this right? Is this wrong?" They just do what they do, and then, later, they suffer the consequences. Either they are totally happy or they suffer, maybe they ate too much and then they have a bellyache, but they don't think: "Oh, I shouldn't have eaten so much." They just suffer from their bellyache. Be like this.

Experience what happens now, and then, later, experience what happens later – totally, without judging it at all.

And then, you will experience that all these things, like your lust, are in fact a help. This is where you learn not to think. This is where you learn to be in the moment. That's what it is about. It's not about becoming a better person. It's not about becoming a certain way so you only do things which are good for your spiritual path.

In a practical way, like what you do, what you eat... The one thing which we learn on the spiritual path is to become unserious: to not think about things, to not judge things; to just be here without thoughts about it. And then, everything else happens by itself. It's unbelievable. I know, you can't imagine this, especially when it comes to sex, but trust me... I went this way. I am talking from my own experience.

The one thing which we learn on the spiritual path is to become unserious: to not think about things, to not judge things; to just be here without thoughts about it.

And then, everything else happens by itself.

It's unbelievable.

So, there's no problem at all. Thank you for your question. I'm very happy that you wrote to me.

So, this this question was not really about sexuality. We take these topics, like sexuality, so serious, but in reality, it's the seriousness about some topic – that's what we have to look at. It's not the topic itself.

Do I help out of joy or obligation?

I have a second question, which is about a completely different area of life, but in this sense, it's about the same thing.

I really like this question.

"For me, it's often like this: someone calls me up and asks for help. And usually, I help. But I've realized that sometimes, it's too much for me. But I always want to help, like a child. I'm really quite naive. Now I'm more careful, and I think about whether I really want to do it and whether my strength allows it.

But then, the thinking sets in: "Actually, I should help"... And now I ask myself whether this first impulse, this 'yes, I can do it', whether this is my soul enjoying it, or rather my helper syndrome. And I wonder whether taking my time, sleeping on it, taking my time before I answer such a question, would be the better approach."

Thank you so much.

You know, it's these seemingly mundane, practical issues and questions which reveal what is really important in life. And I like this question so much because it touches on a second area of life where we have a lot of ideas, a lot of thoughts. The first area was sexuality, and the second area is: we should help. We should be a certain way with our fellow human beings. If somebody asks for help, you should want to help. It's not only that you should be helping, but you should want to help; then you are a good person.

And we can't even imagine saying no. It's like we don't even have space in us for the question: "Do I want to help, or do I not want to help?"

It is not about doing the right thing

So, there are all these ideas we have, old ideas. They are not our ideas, they are humanity's ideas. And this is why we have such a hard time to feel what's up for us in a particular moment. And for me, this was a hard one; exactly, this. I was like you. I always said 'yes'. Somebody asked me for help, or at work, somebody asked me to do something... anywhere: I always said 'yes': "Yes, I can do it. Yes. I want to do it. Yes. I help you."

I didn't even know what I want. I didn't even know whether I have the time or the capability or the lust to do it. It was just unimaginable for me to say 'no'. I couldn't say no. I could not allow myself to consider myself, and it took me a long time to learn this. You know, that's the role of a spiritual Master or Guru: he or she gives you the permission to be the impossible one. He gives you, or she gives you the space to consider: "Hey! Okay, maybe you are totally wrong, but just look at how are you. Just for a moment, what's the truth?"

That's the role of a spiritual Master or Guru:

he or she gives you the permission to be the impossible one.

But it's not about doing the right thing. It it's not about... that's the trap we fall in.

That's the one trap we have in life: We think it's important that we find out what's right in this moment. Should I say yes? Should I say no? What is the truth here? We think this is the question we have to answer. And we think, if I get wiser, I will know better what to answer.

That's the one trap we have in life:

We think it's important that we find out what's right in this moment.

And as you find out, it's very difficult to find the right answer. There's always something contradicting that what you were deciding in a particular moment.

The truth is: it's not difficult to make the right decision or to give the right answer, the answer which is right for you – it is impossible. The secret of life is that it is not about doing it right. It's not about doing it right for other people, but it's also not about doing it right for you.

You see, the real issue, the real problem here is that we ask the question – "is this right?", or "is this wrong?" If you don't ask this question, everything is fine. Somebody asks you for help. You say 'yes'. You do it. You either enjoy doing it, or you don't enjoy it. It doesn't matter. Later, you feel in a particular way. Maybe you feel good. Okay. Maybe you feel bad.

Okay. It doesn't matter. If you don't ask the question: "Is this right?", or later, if you don't ask the question: "Was this right?", then there's no problem. And this is not a spiritual concept. This is very practical. It's the question which creates our suffering, our discomfort. And, this is the important, this is the interesting thing: it prevents us from learning.

The real issue, the real problem here is that we ask the question – "is this right?", or "is this wrong?"

If you don't ask this question, everything is fine.

Learning happens out of experiencing

A child learns very fast without asking any of these questions. A child just does what it does with complete energy. The adult watching this thinks: "Oh my God"... The adult thinks: "Oh, this is terrible", or: "This will lead to problems", or the adult thinks: "Oh, this is great". But the child doesn't think any of these things. The child is not interested in the question: is this good or bad? The child knows nothing about this.

It just knows where the energy goes, where the attention goes, and the child does it. And then, later, the child either totally enjoys it or it suffers. Sometimes the child does something completely stupid, and it leads to injury or suffering or unhappiness, but the child never thinks: "Oh, I shouldn't have done this." No. Then the child is totally in the suffering, or it's totally in the enjoyment.

At no point does the child think about it, analyze it, drawing conclusions. No. The learning happens by itself, out of experiencing it. And the more total you can be with the experience, the faster you learn. We do not learn by analyzing. We do not learn by drawing conclusions. To take your example: you say 'yes'.

You help somebody. Later, you're totally tired and done, and then you think: "Oh, yeah. I didn't really have the strength for this. I didn't really have the time for this. I should have said no." That's what the adult does. But this is not how learning happens. This does not help you the next time.

The more total you can be with the experience,
the faster you learn.

We do not learn by analyzing.

We do not learn by drawing conclusions.

Learning happens by experience, everything you experience, totally, with complete awareness. And complete awareness means: just experiencing like a child, not thinking about it. As soon as you think about it, as soon as you wonder: "Do I want this feeling, or not? Should I have done it, or not? Should I do it, or not?", then you are not there with your awareness. You are in your thoughts. And there, you don't find any answers. And there, you don't learn.

Complete awareness means:

just experiencing like a child, not thinking about it.

Living every moment without judging it

You see, it is like this: we believe you do something, and later, you experience something, and that what you experience later indicates whether that what you did earlier was good or bad. And this is not true. You can do things which are perfectly good for you and perfectly right for you, and you feel totally shitty later. And there are things which are really not good for you, and you feel wonderful later. What we feel and think afterwards has not really a connection to that what we did earlier. This might sound totally strange to you, but you can discover this for yourself.

Just try it out. Live your day. Just experience everything you experience. Do whatever you do. Make the decisions you do. But then, don't question them later. And see what happens. When you do this, it's like a veil is being pulled from your eyes. It's like a new dimension opens up. When you start living every step, every moment, without judging it, without asking yourself, is this right or wrong, and without asking yourself, do I want this feeling? Do I want this feeling or not? When you live like this, it's like your capability to perceive and to see becomes so much more.

And then, you don't draw logical conclusions. It's like you just see and experience totally clearly. And out of this, learning happens. Out of this, wisdom grows, but you don't know how. It's not by you making decisions: "Ah, now I feel like this. This means, next time I will do this different." This is not how it works. This is an illusion.

There is no way for you to know whether something was right or wrong. You just cannot know this, and this is a hard one.

This is real letting go.

There is no way for you to know whether something was right or wrong.

You just cannot know this, and this is a hard one.

This is real letting go.

And then, somebody asks you: "Hey. Can you help me?" And then, maybe you answer spontaneously... Maybe you say: "No. I don't want to."

And later you feel: "Oh, shit, I should have said yes. I would really be happy to help. I know I'm tired. I know I don't have time, but somehow, I know I want to help." Or you say: "Yes. I help you", and then, later, you notice: "I should have done something different. This is not right." You know, you don't know where you trick yourself.

You don't know where your conditioning or your mind tricks yourself. It can trick you in the beginning, when you answer the question. It can trick you while you're experiencing it, and it can trick you later with the thoughts and the feelings you get about what you were doing. At no point of this whole experience do you really know what was right or wrong.

So, you might as well just not think about it. Don't ask yourself the question: is this right or wrong? Was this right or wrong? Don't ask yourself the question, and don't believe that the feeling you get later means something. That's the trap we fall into: we analyze, and the basis of our analyzing are our feelings. Just know that there's no way that you can know anything.

That's the trap we fall into:

we analyze, and the basis of our analyzing are our feelings.

Just know that there's no way that you can know anything.

Life functions in a way which is hidden from us

I know this sounds very strange, but when you realize this, and then, when you start living without asking these questions and without drawing conclusions later, you discover that it's not needed at all.

Life functions in a way which is completely hidden from us. The true way life functions is: the more you are just here completely open for anything, all the things inside of you, the energies guiding you, the feelings coming to you... to be open for all of this... The more you can do this, the more magical life happens in a perfect way.

It doesn't mean that you always feel happy. It doesn't mean that you only feel pleasant feelings. No. But your openness for everything coming to you, without judging it, without rejecting anything, that is a kind of happiness which is beyond anything this world can give you. And in a totally practical way, this guides your life. You know, I talk so much about this seemingly simple question because these questions: should I do it or not... I mean, here, it's about helping, but you could ask this question about many other areas of life, about any decision.

Your openness for everything coming to you, without judging it, without rejecting anything, that is a kind of happiness which is beyond anything this world can give you.

The thing is: you can't know it. The answer doesn't come from up here. And you can never know whether what you do is right or wrong. When you just don't ask these questions, when you don't judge, but instead just say 'yes', allow everything which comes to you and not analyze it later, it is as if, then, you are so connected to the whole life that you do the best thing all the time without having any clue about it. The wisdom which is operating is hidden from you.

The wisdom which is operating is hidden from you.

It's not that then, you feel wise, and then, you know: "Yes, I know, this is the right thing, and when I do this, then I will feel good later." This is not how it works. But what happens out of this is a growing knowing. You experience more and more: "This is right. Yes." It has nothing to do with pleasure. It has nothing to do with whether it feels good or not. You just know: "Yes. This is good. Yes. Yes. Yes."

How I make a decision

So, in a practical way... I tell you how I do it, practically.

I have a decision to make, for instance, when somebody asks me a question like this. And then I do something. Either I answer, or I don't answer. Sometimes I just take my time. Sometimes I ignore the question. Sometimes I don't ignore the question. Sometimes I say 'yes'. Sometimes I say no. But no matter what, I don't think about it much. Sometimes I feel like: "I want to take my time with this."

Sometimes I don't I don't feel like taking my time with a decision, I answer immediately. There is no rule. You don't know how to do it the next time. Just let the next time come. That's how I do it. I just let the next time come, and then, I will see what I do then. And then, later, I do not reconsider. Later, I do not wonder: "Was it right? Was it wrong?"

There is no rule.

You don't know how to do it the next time.

Just let the next time come.

And then, out of this, new events happen, and feelings happen out of this. And then, I feel the feelings. I feel the way I am then, but without considering why I feel like this. I don't analyze: "Oh, now I feel like this because I did it wrong", or: "Ah, now I feel like this because I did it right." I don't do this. I just feel the way I am. I don't wonder: "Do I want to feel like this now?" No. I just feel like this, as if I want it like this; just like this.

And my experience is that with this kind of living, with this kind of attitude.. I don't know how to explain it, but more and more wisdom happens. More and more miracles happen. It's not that I get wiser. I know as little as ever. It's not that I have more clarity and knowing: "Ah, now I do this, and this is the right thing." No. Not at all. It's that I don't need these questions anymore to feel that everything is right. I don't take these questions serious anymore.

I don't wonder what I should do. I don't wonder about what I did. I just live, and the wisdom and the happiness and the Heaven, they just sprout everywhere. I don't know how this is possible, but this is how life works.

When the ego gets starved

So, don't ask yourself these questions. That's the secret. And when I say this, I know this sounds very harmless. It sounds like: "Oh, yeah. This is good. I do it like this." But when you do this, when you stop asking yourself these questions, when you stop analyzing yourself and your past actions, when you stop analyzing your feelings, when you stop wondering: "Do I want this or not", then it's like something in you doesn't get fed anymore, doesn't get nourished anymore: the ego.

This identity, this identification in you which is false: your thoughts. And they don't like it when they don't get taken serious anymore. They make themselves even more serious. And then you feel: "Oh, I can't do this. This is impossible. I must know what I'm doing."

This requires being willing to feel without any clue. This requires you to be willing to feel totally clueless, out of control, and wrong.

And then, life becomes miraculous.

This requires you to be willing to feel totally clueless, out of control, and wrong.

And then, life becomes miraculous.

The direction back into paradise

And that's why I talk about this question so much, this question about the question whether you want to help or not, because this touches the essence of life.

Hell was created back then, in paradise, in Adam and Eve... Mankind was in paradise, and then, humans started asking these questions: "Ah, is this right what I am doing? Is this wrong? Do I want this? Do I not want this?" Judging. That's when hell was created.

Mankind was in paradise, and then, humans started asking these questions:
"Ah, is this right what I am doing? Is this wrong? Do I want this? Do I not want this?"
Judging.

That's when hell was created.

That's the suffering. The suffering does not come from you answering in the wrong way to the question in front of you, and then you doing the wrong things.

The suffering comes from you questioning yourself, and the suffering comes from you not wanting to experience that what you experience. That's why we make all these crazy thoughts. That's why we want to find out what to do, what not to do: simply because we judge ourselves, and because we judge one thing to be good and the other thing to be bad, and we judge one feeling to be more desirable than another feeling. That it. That's the only thing which causes us problems.

And when you return to a way of living without asking these questions, it is as if the world changes; as if suddenly you live in a world which is 10 times, a 100 times, a 1000 times bigger than the world you know – actually, infinite, no boundaries.

Heaven.

That's the direction back into paradise.

I don't know whether this makes sense to you.

I don't know.

You can live like this. And then, you help, and you totally enjoy it. Maybe you are totally overtaxing yourself, and you enjoy this. Or you don't help, and you enjoy this, and then you have bad thoughts about it, and then you are with this, and you enjoy this bad feeling, and this is how you live every step of the way. That's how you come to Heaven.

That's how you lose the identity with your ego, the identification with your ego, the identification with the body. All these spiritual things happen automatically. We can't do them directly. Just by us stopping to wonder: "Is this right? Is this wrong? Should I do this? Should I not? Do I like this? Do I not like this?" That's all. Just learning to live without these questions – that's all.

That's how I live.

Just learning to live without these questions –
that's all.

That's how I live.

When you can't say anything

Let's see. I think I have time for one more question. There is one question I would like to answer before I stop for today.

"Thank you from the bottom of my heart for your videos. It's balm for the soul, a very rare, raw, precious, and expensive balm, so much so that sometimes, I find myself not wanting to share it with everyone. That's funny to observe. Am I stingy, or do I know somehow that not everyone is able to recognize the gold in it?"

Thank you. Thank you for your email. First of all, I want to say that: yes, it is very precious and expensive, and I don't have anything to do with it. You know, for me, it is as much of a gift as for you. I don't know how this is possible. I don't know.

I don't know.

But thank you for your words. And, yes, it is like this. You can trust your feeling. You know, you experience meditation. You experience this spiritual path, and it's like what Jesus said: "Call from the rooftops." You want to tell everybody.

But often, you can't say a word. And you can trust it. Something knows what to say and what not. And Swamiji, my Indian Guru, he speaks about this. He says: when somebody is not open, it is impossible for you to speak about it. It just doesn't work. Maybe a very good friend of yours comes for a cup of tea, and you want to share this with this friend. And maybe you even think: "Oh, this would be good for her. I know this would help her so much." And then the friend is there, and you can't say a word.

All you do is talk about the weather. And then, the friend is gone, and you think: "Why was I so cowardly? Why didn't I have the courage to talk about this?" Trust that it is right. If the other person would be open, you would just talk. And it's the other way around, too. Sometimes you meet a person, and the last thing you want to do is talk about spiritual things with such a person. You think: "This doesn't fit. I can't do this. This person doesn't want to hear this.

And what do they think about me?" But you don't know that this person is somehow ready and open for it. Maybe this person herself or himself doesn't even know this. But then, you have an encounter with such a person, and, suddenly, you just start talking about it. And later, you think: "Oh my God. What did I do? Why did I talk about this? This person is not interested at all." But you can trust it. You would not be able to talk about it if this other soul would not be open.

You can just trust this. And you get relaxed with it after a while. Sometimes, you talk about it, sometimes not, and you just know: something knows better. You don't have to know. For me, it's the same, just like this.

About a year ago or half a year ago, I was sitting at the haircutter. I have to go to the haircutter again next week. And this lady... Usually, I sit there. I don't say a word. I just sit there. I enjoy getting my haircut, and I'm very happy that somebody takes care of my hair. But about half a year ago, I was sitting there, and suddenly, I started talking about the meditation. And I thought: "What am I doing here?" And then, it turned out that this person was totally open.

And since then, she talks about meditation with me all the time, and she even encouraged me to start a meditation group here. The hairdresser did this. She encouraged me for this. She said: "Yes, this would be a good idea. I'm sure many people here would like this." So, I started talking about this, and I thought this is totally wrong and stupid. And then it turned out to be so fruitful and so lovely. And sometimes, somebody is here where I think: "Ah, this is a person where I want to talk about this", and I don't say a word. I don't say one word. I just trust these things.

Thank you for your question.

That's how I live

That's how I live. You I stopped wondering whether what I'm doing is right. I learned in the last 25 years that I cannot know this. And when you get wise, it doesn't mean that you know more. It means that you know that it's okay to not know. You trust more, and you just let life happen. And whatever happens in life, you say 'yes', because you know it's good. You experience it. This knowing is an experience, not a factual knowing up here, not an analysis.

When you get wise, it doesn't mean that you know more.

It means that you know that it's okay to not know.

You trust more, and you just let life happen.

And then, everything what happens in life is good. Masturbation, sex, helping other people, not helping other people, it's all okay.

There was something which wanted to be said, but it's gone again. And when this happens, sometimes I just wait for a moment to see whether it wants to come back or not.

Why only the Pure and Innocent can enter Heaven

You know, often it is being said that only the pure and innocent can enter the Kingdom of God. Only the pure and innocent can enter Heaven.

But we don't know what is meant with this purity and with this innocence. Usually, we think, this purity means having no bad wishes and lust, and stuff like this. We imagine, being pure means not wanting to have sex, not wanting to have an orgasm, not desiring things.

Being innocent... we believe, this means not doing anything bad, not committing any sin, helping other people when they ask, doing the right thing all the time. We believe: this is being innocent. We believe: this is being pure. And this is not true. We interpret these two words on a worldly level, but they are being meant on a soul level, and that means... Being pure is: not questioning God, not questioning anything.

Not asking myself: what is the right decision here? Not asking myself, did I do it right? Should I have been doing it differently?

Being pure is:
not questioning God,
not questioning anything.

Not asking myself: what is the right decision here?

Not asking myself, did I do it right?

Purity means: not having these thoughts, not having these questions. That's purity. And innocence is living life out of this not knowing, out of this not questioning myself, not questioning anything. That's innocence. And when you live like this, and this is unimaginable for normal people, nothing bad can happen. Nothing wrong can happen.

And then, people see saints. They experience a saint, and then they see: he only does good things. But they don't know where it comes from. And the purity and the innocence is: not thinking about this; not questioning yourself; not questioning the thoughts, not the feelings, not your actions; not preferring one thing over another; just not asking these questions. This is purity. Then, you are empty up there. You know nothing anymore, and yet, your world is huge, infinite.

Thank you for being here. I'm so happy that you are here.

I love you.